Let�s make this simple. Instead of people telling a story, we will just have some simple quotes.
�Do you feel the need for Greed?� -Chuck Woolery
�Is that your final answer?�-Regis Philbman
�I never thought you�d be a junkie because heroin is so passe.�-The Dandy
Warhols
�If it�s not here, then it must be somewhere else�-Theo �Kue�
�And that�s the way it is�-Celiene Dion
Ok, we�ve finished the quotes, now the 7 deadly sins.
1. Christianity (I know coming from the bible, it�s kind of weird, but see the saint Dion�s quote)
2. Stupidity (Ignorance isn�t bliss, it�s DEATH)
3. Felonies (Obey the law or else)
4. Limp Bizkit & Rap Music (They are the sexists)
5. KKK (They are the racists)
6. Football/Basketball/Baseball players (They are the homophobes)
7. Marilyn Manson (I dunno, I just don�t like him much)
Ok, time to explain the fiends.
1. Satan = Ricky
2. Lucifer = Mike AKA Big Red (Satan and Lucifer are 2 different people)
3. Devil = Nick (Devil, Satan, and Lucifer are 3 different people.)
4. The New Jersey Devils = 1996 & 2000 Stanley Cup Champions (OK, so I
don�t really hate the NJ Devs., but they sort of fit in with this catagory).
Ok, almost done, now the new and improved 10 commandments:
1. Thou shall buy meat and gain as many bonuses as obtainable in Supermarket
Sweep.
2. Thou shall not try to start a fashion trend less ye be a homosexual.
3. Thou shall not kill (This one is unedited).
4. Thou shall not have sex with thy neighbors wife, but down the street and it�s
fair game.
5. No harm, no foul.
6. Thou must not speak negatively about ye hockey.
7. Thou must not speak negatively about ye saints.
8. Adam, Eve and the Apple is now changed to Adam Ant, Eva Gabor, and Fiona
Apple.
9. Thou shall support ye Habs.
10. Thou must not invade thine goalies crease unless thine puck precedes ye. (Not valid in NHL or AHL hockey).
Saint time!
These are my current saints, applying is first come first serve.
Theo �Kue�- Saint of Boredom.
The Go-Go�s-Saints of the beat.
Jewel-Saint of Igloos.
Madonna-Saint of things that are like Virgins, and Prayers. Also saint of Evita,
Human Nature, Rain, Erotica, Everybody, Beautiful Strangers, Frozen things,
Good-byes, Rays of Light, Vogue, Holidays, Materials, Nothing, Papa�s who
don�t preach, and Secrets.
Francesca-Saint of Ruling and being the best.
Michelle-Saint of Retards.
Stephanie(The one with the infamous website)-Saint of Usless Information.
Celine Dion- Saint of Divas
If you wish to be added as a saint of something, tell me or e-mail me
([email protected]) and have the following:
�What your the saint of.
�Why you should be the saint of this.
We only take the best, so since your accually still looking at my website, then you most likely won't make it. Please head your letter "Saint Application".
Afterward:
See, the new and improved "Bible 2K1" is alot easier to read than that silly huge old "Schmible". Get with the times, and choose "Bible 2K1" as your official religious book.
(Jingle singers) "Bible 2K1: our candles burned for a million days!"
END!
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