I only happen to live in the Central Time Zone. I, therefore, can't help but notice that the people out here, and, indeed, the people in all of the time zones that aren't Eastern, basically get ignored during the New Year's celebrations. Therefore, I have written a song for these people, the lyrics of which are presented here.
New Year's Eve—the confetti's flying
And the excitement is at its most
With joy, the crowd is crying
But only on the east coast.
Yes, the east is having the time of their lives
While the rest of the country rots.
They're all giving hugs and high-fives;
We just sit here and get the plotz.
[Refrain]Would it hurt to give us some attention?
We're people too, you know!
On TV, we get no mention;
Not one special event or show.
What's wrong with a celebration for us?
Like fireworks or dropping a ball?
Out east, they certainly make such a fuss.
I tell you, this makes no sense at all.
We're also entitled to celebrate;
We like to have fun, too!
We like to drink and make out with our dates;
We're just the same as you.
[refrain, followed by short interlude]
Let's waltz right into New York City
And disable their little ball.
They think they're all sitting pretty;
But suppose their ball doesn't fall...
New Year's Eve—the confetti's flying
And the excitement is at its most
With disappointment, the crowd'll be crying
Out there on the east coast.
[refrain, followed by some sort of ending]
* * * *
By the way, for those of you that don't know, to "get the plotz" essentially means "to get frustrated."