The Beth Dart Quiz

Check the correct answer to each question. An alert box will appear to let you know if it is correct or not. Make sure you count how many you got right on the first guess.If your answer is not right--TRY AGAIN. 1. You’re trapped in a theatre that only plays old MacGuyver re-runs and you’re forced to stay there living off Taco Bell food for one month. What is the one thing you want to bring? A gun. Your Bible... so you can thank God for being such a nice guy. An extremely attractive and desperate person of your sexual preference. 2. What is TOOL? NOUN: (pl. tools) Object used to perform a task. (ex. hammer, screwdriver) The tool Betty used to fix the door was a hammer The Ontario Old-timer‘s League The best band of all time, complete with lead singer Maynard James Keenan. 3. Natural Light beer is: Beer for poor people. What you drink when all of the Coronas run out. Good beer for a great price. 4. You wake up one morning to hear a knock at the front door. It‘s Ol‘ Wayne and Lil‘ Blacktooth Bobby Jo from next door. It seems the rednecks got out again and shot your dog, mistaking it for a deer. This is the fourth dog this year. You: Finally call Social Services and tell them that Ol‘ Wayne feeds his family uncooked pig‘s feet and makes the kids sleep in the tool shed. Tie their dog to your dog house and see how quickly they mistake one of their own animals for a deer. Kill the whole damned redneck family in their sleep. 5. A random woman approaches you and tells you that she believes sea creatures are the insect kingdom of the ocean. In her theory, she points out that the Earth‘s surface is 1/4 land and 3/4 water. In this case, she decides, creatures of the ocean must be larger than those on land. Because of the antennae and exoskeletons she sees on most seafood, it only makes sense to her that such sea life as shrimp are equivalent to gnats, lobsters to roaches, crabs to ticks, etc. You: Agree with her and then ask her to share her high quality narcotics. Spit on her and run away. Tell her that you believe mice are really tiny grizzly bears. 6. Would you rather drink a five gallon bucket full of mucus or have sex with one of your immediate family members? Have sex with the family member Drink the five gallon bucket of mucus 7. Bob and Sandy have been dating for six months. Bob found out that Sandy has been cheating on him with his brother. When Bob confronted Sandy about it, she spit in his face and then proceeded throw a telephone at his head and break everything in his bedroom. What should he do? Call the police on her for attempted assault, trespassing, and destruction of private property. Keep his cool until she‘s gone and then beat the hell out of his brother. He can‘t hit girls--it‘s like a moral code. Smack the bitch.

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<br><blockquote><font face="Arial">Check the correct answer to each question. An alert box will appear to let you know if it is correct or not. If your <br>answer is not right--TRY AGAIN.</font></blockquote></blockquote></blockquote><hr WIDTH="100%"><blockquote><blockquote><blockquote><h4> <br><font face="Arial">1. You’re trapped in a theatre that only plays old MacGuyver re-runs and you’re forced to stay there living off Taco Bell food for one month. What is the one thing you want to bring?<font></h4> <br><form><input TYPE="radio" onClick="alert('You can’t be serious... try again.')"><font face="Arial">A gun.</font> <br><p><input TYPE="radio" onClick="alert('It’s nice to see you’re on my level. TV lost all class when it lost MacGuyver.')"><font face="Arial">Your Bible... so you can thank God for being such a nice guy.</font> <br><p><input TYPE="radio" onClick="alert('Very close... but not correct in this instance.')"><font face="Arial">An extremely attractive and desperate person of your sexual preference.</font></form> <br><p><hr WIDTH="100%"><h4> <br><font face="Arial">2. What is TOOL?</font></h4> <br><form><input TYPE="radio" onClick="alert('A mistake like this is punishable by death in my book. Try Again.')"><font face="Arial">NOUN: (pl. tools) Object used to perform a task. (ex. hammer, screwdriver) <i>The tool Betty used to fix the door was a hammer</i></font> <br><p><input TYPE="radio" onClick="alert('What kind of stuff do you think I‘m into? Go away.')"><font face="Arial">The Ontario Old-timer‘s League</font> <br><p><input TYPE="radio" onClick="alert(' Praise the gods of music. Good answer.')"><font face="Arial">The best band of all time, complete with lead singer Maynard James Keenan. </font></form><p> <br><hr WIDTH="100%"></blockquote></blockquote></blockquote><blockquote><blockquote><blockquote> <br><font face="Arial"><b>3. Natural Light beer is:<form><input TYPE="radio" onClick="alert('Watch your mouth. I’ve spent many-a-night wallowing in the splendor of that “poor man’s beer”. Try again.')"></b>Beer for poor people.</font> <br><p><input TYPE="radio" onClick="alert('You’d drink the Coronas first? Here’s a lesson from Bethy D.- any beer you need to put a lime in before it tastes good is a bad beer. No folks, a high price does not mean a good beer. It just means you have to much money to be spending in the first place. Try again.')"><font face="Arial">What you drink when all of the Coronas run out.</font> <br><p><input TYPE="radio" onClick="alert('Damn right... and don’t let anyone ever tell you different.')"><font face="Arial">Good beer for a great price.</font></form><p><hr WIDTH="100%"></blockquote></blockquote></blockquote><blockquote><blockquote><blockquote> <br><font face="Arial"><b>4. You wake up one morning to hear a knock at the front door. It‘s Ol‘ Wayne and Lil‘ Blacktooth Bobby Jo from next door. It seems the rednecks got out again and shot your dog, mistaking it for a deer. This is the fourth dog this year. You:<form><input TYPE="radio" onClick="alert('That seems to be the most logical answer. Good job.')"></b>Finally call Social Services and tell them that Ol‘ Wayne feeds his family uncooked pig‘s feet and makes the kids sleep in the tool shed.</font> <br><p><input TYPE="radio" onClick="alert('Good idea, but it won’t work. You’ll have to remember that these are real rednecks. In that case, their dog has been dead for five months and is still tied to a chicken house in the backyard with no food or water. That doesn’t mean that Ol’ Wayne actually knows his dog is dead. In fact, if he would have actually remembered he had a dog, he would have fed it to his family long ago. Tying the dead dog to your doghouse would do no good. Not even rednecks shoot dead animals- they simply put them in the bed of their truck to haul home for dinner. Try again.')"><font face="Arial">Tie their dog to your dog house and see how quickly they mistake one of their own animals for a deer.</font> <br><p><input TYPE="radio" onClick="alert('You’re a sick person. Stay away from me and anyone I know... and if you can’t do that, at least try to answer the question correctly. ')"><font face="Arial">Kill the whole damned redneck family in their sleep.</font></form><p><hr WIDTH="100%"></blockquote></blockquote></blockquote><blockquote><blockquote><blockquote> <br><font face="Arial"><b>5. A random woman approaches you and tells you that she believes sea creatures are the insect kingdom of the ocean. In her theory, she points out that the Earth‘s surface is 1/4 land and 3/4 water. In this case, she decides, creatures of the ocean must be larger than those on land. Because of the antennae and exoskeletons she sees on most seafood, it only makes sense to her that such sea life as shrimp are equivalent to gnats, lobsters to roaches, crabs to ticks, etc. You tell her:<form><input TYPE="radio" onClick="alert('Exactly. That is my personal theory of the existance of sea life. Never tell me different. Next question.')"></b>Lots and lots of high quality narcotics.</font> <br><p><input TYPE="radio" onClick="alert('You know damn well you wouldn‘t actually do that. Try again.')"><font face="Arial">Spit on her and run away.</font> <br><p><input TYPE="radio" onClick="alert('I don’t think that’s how you should go about solving your dilemma.')"><font face="Arial">Tell her that you believe mice are really tiny grizzly bears.</font> <br><p><hr WIDTH="100%"></blockquote></blockquote></blockquote><blockquote><blockquote><blockquote> <br><font face="Arial"><b>6. Would you rather drink a five gallon bucket full of mucus or have sex with one of your immediate family members?<form><p> <br><input TYPE="radio" onClick="alert('Hey... it’s a tough choice, guys. There’s no right answer to this question. You can go ahead to the next. God have mercy on us all. ')"></b>Have sex with the family member</font> <br><p><input TYPE="radio" onClick="alert('Hey... it’s a tough choice, guys. There’s no right answer to this question. You can go ahead to the next. God have mercy on us all. ')"><font face="Arial">Drink the five gallon bucket of mucus</font></form><p><hr WIDTH="100%"></blockquote></blockquote></blockquote><blockquote><blockquote><blockquote> <br><font face="Arial"><b>7. Bob and Sandy have been dating for six months. Bob found out that Sandy has been cheating on him with his brother. When Bob confronted Sandy about it, she spit in his face and then proceeded throw a telephone at his head and break everything in his bedroom. What should he do?<form><input TYPE="radio" onClick="alert('That’s so weak. Try again.')"></b>Call the police on her for attempted assault, trespassing, and destruction of private property.</font> <br><p><input TYPE="radio" onClick="alert('Are you kidding? This bitch just broke all your stuff and you’re just going to play it cool? Try again.')"><font face="Arial">Keep his cool until she‘s gone and then beat the hell out of his brother. He can‘t hit girls--it‘s like a moral code.</font> <br><p><input TYPE="radio" onClick="alert('Correct! I’m not saying domestic abuse is right. That is by far my opinion. But just because someone is a female doesn’t mean they don’t deserve to be confronted like everyone else in the world. I’ve seen too many bitches walk all over good guys because they’re too polite to let a girl know when she’s done something out of line.')"><font face="Arial">Smack the bitch.</font></form><p><hr WIDTH="100%"></blockquote></blockquote></blockquote></body> <br><center> <br><img src=http://www.geocities.com/potionraver/"http://homepages.go.com/~wickedeclipse/graphics/results.bmp"> <br></html> <br> <br></font>"> <font face="" size=""> <center><table width="700" cellpadding="" border=0> <TR> <TD width="700" colspan=2 valign=top><font face="" size=""> <!doctype html public "-//w3c//dtd html 4.0 transitional//en"><html><meta http-equiv="Content-Type" content="text/html; charset=iso-8859-1"><meta name="GENERATOR" content="Mozilla/4.61 [en] (Win98; I) [Netscape]"><meta name="Author" content="Beth Dart Quiz"><center><img src=http://www.geocities.com/potionraver/"http://homepages.go.com/~wickedeclipse/graphics/quiz.bmp"> <br><center><img src=http://www.geocities.com/potionraver/"http://homepages.go.com/~wickedeclipse/graphics/fire.gif">
<br><blockquote><font face="Arial">Check the correct answer to each question. An alert box will appear to let you know if it is correct or not. If your <br>answer is not right--TRY AGAIN.</font></blockquote></blockquote></blockquote><hr WIDTH="100%"><blockquote><blockquote><blockquote><h4> <br><font face="Arial">1. You’re trapped in a theatre that only plays old MacGuyver re-runs and you’re forced to stay there living off Taco Bell food for one month. What is the one thing you want to bring?<font></h4> <br><form><input TYPE="radio" onClick="alert('You can’t be serious... try again.')"><font face="Arial">A gun.</font> <br><p><input TYPE="radio" onClick="alert('It’s nice to see you’re on my level. TV lost all class when it lost MacGuyver.')"><font face="Arial">Your Bible... so you can thank God for being such a nice guy.</font> <br><p><input TYPE="radio" onClick="alert('Very close... but not correct in this instance.')"><font face="Arial">An extremely attractive and desperate person of your sexual preference.</font></form> <br><p><hr WIDTH="100%"><h4> <br><font face="Arial">2. What is TOOL?</font></h4> <br><form><input TYPE="radio" onClick="alert('A mistake like this is punishable by death in my book. Try Again.')"><font face="Arial">NOUN: (pl. tools) Object used to perform a task. (ex. hammer, screwdriver) <i>The tool Betty used to fix the door was a hammer</i></font> <br><p><input TYPE="radio" onClick="alert('What kind of stuff do you think I‘m into? Go away.')"><font face="Arial">The Ontario Old-timer‘s League</font> <br><p><input TYPE="radio" onClick="alert(' Praise the gods of music. Good answer.')"><font face="Arial">The best band of all time, complete with lead singer Maynard James Keenan. </font></form><p> <br><hr WIDTH="100%"></blockquote></blockquote></blockquote><blockquote><blockquote><blockquote> <br><font face="Arial"><b>3. Natural Light beer is:<form><input TYPE="radio" onClick="alert('Watch your mouth. I’ve spent many-a-night wallowing in the splendor of that “poor man’s beer”. Try again.')"></b>Beer for poor people.</font> <br><p><input TYPE="radio" onClick="alert('You’d drink the Coronas first? Here’s a lesson from Bethy D.- any beer you need to put a lime in before it tastes good is a bad beer. No folks, a high price does not mean a good beer. It just means you have to much money to be spending in the first place. Try again.')"><font face="Arial">What you drink when all of the Coronas run out.</font> <br><p><input TYPE="radio" onClick="alert('Damn right... and don’t let anyone ever tell you different.')"><font face="Arial">Good beer for a great price.</font></form><p><hr WIDTH="100%"></blockquote></blockquote></blockquote><blockquote><blockquote><blockquote> <br><font face="Arial"><b>4. You wake up one morning to hear a knock at the front door. It‘s Ol‘ Wayne and Lil‘ Blacktooth Bobby Jo from next door. It seems the rednecks got out again and shot your dog, mistaking it for a deer. This is the fourth dog this year. You:<form><input TYPE="radio" onClick="alert('That seems to be the most logical answer. Good job.')"></b>Finally call Social Services and tell them that Ol‘ Wayne feeds his family uncooked pig‘s feet and makes the kids sleep in the tool shed.</font> <br><p><input TYPE="radio" onClick="alert('Good idea, but it won’t work. You’ll have to remember that these are real rednecks. In that case, their dog has been dead for five months and is still tied to a chicken house in the backyard with no food or water. That doesn’t mean that Ol’ Wayne actually knows his dog is dead. In fact, if he would have actually remembered he had a dog, he would have fed it to his family long ago. Tying the dead dog to your doghouse would do no good. Not even rednecks shoot dead animals- they simply put them in the bed of their truck to haul home for dinner. Try again.')"><font face="Arial">Tie their dog to your dog house and see how quickly they mistake one of their own animals for a deer.</font> <br><p><input TYPE="radio" onClick="alert('You’re a sick person. Stay away from me and anyone I know... and if you can’t do that, at least try to answer the question correctly. ')"><font face="Arial">Kill the whole damned redneck family in their sleep.</font></form><p><hr WIDTH="100%"></blockquote></blockquote></blockquote><blockquote><blockquote><blockquote> <br><font face="Arial"><b>5. A random woman approaches you and tells you that she believes sea creatures are the insect kingdom of the ocean. In her theory, she points out that the Earth‘s surface is 1/4 land and 3/4 water. In this case, she decides, creatures of the ocean must be larger than those on land. Because of the antennae and exoskeletons she sees on most seafood, it only makes sense to her that such sea life as shrimp are equivalent to gnats, lobsters to roaches, crabs to ticks, etc. You tell her:<form><input TYPE="radio" onClick="alert('Exactly. That is my personal theory of the existance of sea life. Never tell me different. Next question.')"></b>Lots and lots of high quality narcotics.</font> <br><p><input TYPE="radio" onClick="alert('You know damn well you wouldn‘t actually do that. Try again.')"><font face="Arial">Spit on her and run away.</font> <br><p><input TYPE="radio" onClick="alert('I don’t think that’s how you should go about solving your dilemma.')"><font face="Arial">Tell her that you believe mice are really tiny grizzly bears.</font> <br><p><hr WIDTH="100%"></blockquote></blockquote></blockquote><blockquote><blockquote><blockquote> <br><font face="Arial"><b>6. Would you rather drink a five gallon bucket full of mucus or have sex with one of your immediate family members?<form><p> <br><input TYPE="radio" onClick="alert('Hey... it’s a tough choice, guys. There’s no right answer to this question. You can go ahead to the next. God have mercy on us all. ')"></b>Have sex with the family member</font> <br><p><input TYPE="radio" onClick="alert('Hey... it’s a tough choice, guys. There’s no right answer to this question. You can go ahead to the next. God have mercy on us all. ')"><font face="Arial">Drink the five gallon bucket of mucus</font></form><p><hr WIDTH="100%"></blockquote></blockquote></blockquote><blockquote><blockquote><blockquote> <br><font face="Arial"><b>7. Bob and Sandy have been dating for six months. Bob found out that Sandy has been cheating on him with his brother. When Bob confronted Sandy about it, she spit in his face and then proceeded throw a telephone at his head and break everything in his bedroom. What should he do?<form><input TYPE="radio" onClick="alert('That’s so weak. Try again.')"></b>Call the police on her for attempted assault, trespassing, and destruction of private property.</font> <br><p><input TYPE="radio" onClick="alert('Are you kidding? This bitch just broke all your stuff and you’re just going to play it cool? Try again.')"><font face="Arial">Keep his cool until she‘s gone and then beat the hell out of his brother. He can‘t hit girls--it‘s like a moral code.</font> <br><p><input TYPE="radio" onClick="alert('Correct! I’m not saying domestic abuse is right. That is by far my opinion. But just because someone is a female doesn’t mean they don’t deserve to be confronted like everyone else in the world. I’ve seen too many bitches walk all over good guys because they’re too polite to let a girl know when she’s done something out of line.')"><font face="Arial">Smack the bitch.</font></form><p><hr WIDTH="100%"></blockquote></blockquote></blockquote> <br><center> <br><img src=http://www.geocities.com/potionraver/"http://homepages.go.com/~wickedeclipse/graphics/results.bmp"> <br> <br> <br></font></TD> </TR> <TR> <TD width="300" valign=top><font face="" size=""> </TD> <TD width="400" valign=top><font face="" size=""> </TD> </TR> <TR> <TD width="700" colspan=2 valign=top><font face="" size=""> <center><A HREF=http://www.geocities.com/potionraver/"http://homepages.go.com/~wickedeclipse/home.html"> <IMG SRC=http://www.geocities.com/potionraver/"http://images.wbs.net/wbs3/auto/find_me_banner_logo.gif" WIDTH=131 HEIGHT=40 BORDER=0></A> </TD><TD bgcolor=ffcc00><IMG SRC=http://www.geocities.com/potionraver/"http://images.wbs.net/wbs3/auto/find_me_search.gif" WIDTH=36 HEIGHT=40 BORDER=0></TD><TD bgcolor=ffcc00><FONT SIZE=1 FACE="ARIAL,HELVETICA" color=000000>Search WBS Home Pages</FONT><br><FONT SIZE=2 FACE="ARIAL,HELVETICA"><INPUT NAME="search" VALUE="" size=15></FONT><FONT SIZE=1 FACE="ARIAL,HELVETICA"><INPUT TYPE=submit value="Search"></FONT></TD> </TR> </TABLE> </TD> </TR> </TABLE></center></FORM></body> </html>">

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