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| CAT... 1. Pick cat up and cradle in the crook of your left arm, as if holding a baby. Position right forefinger and thumb on either side of cat's mouth and gently apply pressure to cheeks while holding pill in right hand. As cat opens mouth, pop pill into mouth. Allow cat to close mouth and swallow. 2. Retrieve pill from floor and cat from behind sofa. Cradle cat in left arm and repeat process. 3. Retrieve cat from bedroom and throw away soggy pill. 4. Take new pill from foil wrap, cradle cat in left arm, holding rear paws tightly with left hand. Force jaws open and push pill to back of mouth. Hold mouth shut for count of 10. 5. Retrieve pill from goldfish bowl and cat from top of dresser. 6. Kneel on floor with cat wedged tightly between knees, hold front and rear paws tightly. Ignore low growls. Get helper to hold head firmly while forcing wooden ruler into cat's mouth. Drop pill down ruler and rub cat's throat vigorously. 7. Retrieve cat from curtain rod. Start over at step 1. DOG.. 1. Wrap pill in bacon and toss it up into the air. |
| HOW TO GIVE A CAT AND A DOG A PILL |