THIS IS THE CREAM OF THE CROP!

Name: Nebbers
Country of Birth: Sunnyvale
Height: 7 foot ten inches, bitch
Weight: 199
Endurance Level: 2
Likes: The League of Nations, the League of Extraordinary Gentleman, National Baseball League
Dislikes: Orchid thieves
Quote: Mute. But if he could say something it would probably be like this, "Mmmm...Imaginary dick."
Worst Enemy: Less Than Jake

Name: George Hanover
Country of Birth: Probably America
Height: 5'6
Weight: 186
Endurance Level: A Perfect 10...(hear that ladies??? or rather, read that???)
Likes: Long walks on the beach, gothic poetry, Cats (as in the Broadway show)
Dislikes: Drunken sots, the liberal media, Kid Rock
Quote: "He's a mute actually." (this is what he likes to say)
Worst Enemy: That guy at the liquor store. What a fucking cock he is.

Name: Nicodemus Tiddlywink
Country of Birth: Latvia
Height: 6'8
Weight: 213 lbs.
Endurance Level: 6.8
Likes: Sunglasses, standing, pleasuring ladies with his dirty limericks
Dislikes: Russians, Chuck Palanhiuk, Brandon Boyd
Quote: "I didn't even know I was a mail order groom!"
Worst Enemy: Mothra

Name: Raphael
Country of Birth: America
Height: 6'3-6'4, something in that ballpark
Weight: Never asked
Endurance Level: 9.1
Likes: Mr. Burnett, Journalism, Chico, Wanton Butchery, Aqua
Dislikes: Good Riddance
Quote: "Shoot to kill"
Worst Enemy: Raph has no enemies. They are all dead

Name: Remy ibn al-Salat Shahaf the False Mustachi Lad
Country of Birth: Ireland, duh.
Height: Varies
Weight: Likewise
Endurance Level: 8
Likes: Oh, just about everything but cream cheese
Dislikes: People who don't realize by now that he hates cream cheese
Quote: "Ah, American Women. They are feisty, like a well formed potato."
Worst Enemy: Michael Collins

Name: Mr Beefy
Country Of Birth: Argentinio
Height: 2'6 and twice as wide
Weight: More than all the poultry in Christendom (170 lbs.)
Endurance: Roll two 4-sided die, subtract charisma
Likes: Buillon cubes, masturbating, and 'the ladies'
Dislikes: Tortilla chips, children, and womenfolk
Quote: "Anyone named Colin is a pal of mine."
Worst Enemy: Lex Luthor and all who threaten the Hall of Justice

Name: Hawaiian Mike
Country of Birth: Finland
Height: 5'5-5'6
Weight: 84
Endurance: 8.5
Likes: The Blue Album by Weezer
Dislikes: The Green Album by Weezer
Quote: "What's up with these immigrants?"
Worst Enemy: Himself. And gypsies, we mustn't forget them

Name: Julius Finius Flubber
Country of Birth: South Korea
Height: 5'2
Weight: Not sure, but he's built like a tank
Endurance: 5.7
Likes: Grass, dogs, fucking (he's the only one who likes this so far...odd)
Dislikes: Talking out of turn, rude behavior, J.K. Rowling and her Harry Potter Empire
Quote: "Men who are unhappy, like men who sleep badly, are always proud of the fact."
Worst Enemy: Jacques Chirac

I am a sensitive little kitty cat. Who kind of looks like a fox. A guy fox...day. Order me! Or die!