The Poo Productions Gang

Not pictured: Brandon Gloom, Ian, Jesus

Poo Productions Players:

Jaysin Arthurs
Jaysin Arthurs is the descendant of the famous Abraham Lincoln Zombie. He, along with fellow Cushite Josh Hitt founded Poo Productions in 1997 to combat the growing elk population. (for more information, visit the Society For the Eradication of Elk, Deer and Caribou). Currently, Jaysin is nested in the warm tussels of former president Bill Clinton's bowells.

Jesus Christ
The saviour of all mankind, Jesus knows what it is to be successful. That is why Jaysin appointed Jesus as his executive in charge of PR. Jesus enjoys spending time with his family, performing miracles, and just hanging out with the guys. Always driven, Jesus' busy schedule surprisingly leaves him with lots of spare time to hang out with all his friends. When asked how he accomplishes this, Jesus replied that being omnipresent helps a lot.

Brandon Gloom
Brandon has drawn many of the covers for Jaysin's books all in the blood of the innocent. Ever a man of ellusiveness and rumour, Brandon was last seen (so it is said) on highway forty selling crack cocaine to underage vampire prostitutes and their 500 pound inbred mothers while on the phone attempting to contact Luke Perry to warn him of an Alien attack from the secret society cult of woodchucks named Marmeduke whose evil plot is to dominate the Earth without expressed written consent of the NFL. Brandon is also a firm religious believer in Sadomassochism.

Kortney Hall
Korney works at a circuis as a lion trainer. She enjoys long walks on the beach with wild monkeys and giraffes. In her spare time, she enjoys picking her nose, eating banannas, and playing with chickens at the Chicken Pantry in Bunnell, FL. Oh yeah, she's also a member of PP and she thinks it is fun eating poo at Poo Productions board meetings.

Elyse Herzog
Better known as Justin Timberlake, Ms. Herzog has for many years widely influenced the pop culture with many appearances on MTV and Bloomberg Telivision. Elyse has supported Poo Productions with her vast fortuned earned by singing the song "Baby, I wanna sex you up and down the street at 1:00 AM". For her contributions to PP, Elyse has earned the title of "Businesswoman/Pop Singer/ Employee of the month"

Josh Hitt
Josh has moved on to bigger and brighter things since the start of Poo Productions. You can now see him in the broadway show "Fat Guys & France". Josh has repeatedly asked that he have no association with Poo Productions, as he fears the wild oats of his youth will come back to haunt him when he runs for president in 2032. But of course, we still keep talking about him anyway.

Robby Noble
Robby has been spending a lot of time on the carnival circuit, so he hasn't spent much time with PP. In his free time, he enjoys inbreeding, a skill he learned from his fellow "carnies". He also enjoys beating English-African-Hispanic-Macedonian-Ethiopian-Mexican-Canadian-Americans.

Carly Schrader
Carly dreams of owning a llama and riding it through central park. In her free time she enjoys writing pooetry and pondering the deeper meaning of cheese in a can. The color of bright green is something that she is never without. She loves being a member of Poo Productions and hopes to one day write something worth publishing through the company (not bloody likely Carly). Never underestimate the power of bright green tube socks!

Cassie Schrader
Cassie has been always been very supportive of Poo Productions because she enjoys embezzling money from the company. In sharp contrast to her twin sister, Carly, Cassie despises circus lamas and has cocreated the Society for the Eradication of Elk, Deer, Caribou, and Circus Llamas.

Michael Vowell
Mr. Vowell is a hiddeously deformed wombat whose passion for anarchy inspires him to work for Poo Productions. His fondness for purple alligators drove him to move to Shellbyville Wisconsin. I have not heard from him since.

Wess
Wess enjoys speaking candidly and not giving out his last name.