flew down the stairs, fear of the unknown consuming her with each passing second.
"Raven! Where are you going?!" Mrs. Kenzington shouted, as she heard the sound of
Raven's thunderous pounding.
Raven ignored her mom's question and slipped on her soggy Doc Martin's, not bothering
to tie the laces. She ran out the door and into the mouth of the now violent storm. Her
Mustang patiently sat in the driveway; luckily the convertible top was closed.
[Oh God, I hope he's ok....this is all my fault, he was rushing to see me and then he got
scraped off the highway by some drunk. Oh please let him be ok], she desperately wished.
She hopped into the car without even opening the door and recklessly backed out of the
driveway with a startling screech. Zipping past the streets and completely ignoring a red
light, if she'd been in a NASCAR race, all the other racers would be eating her dust.
She made it to Orlando Memorial Hospital in less than five minutes and crammed her car
into the first parking spot she saw. She fought her way through the rain and into the
hospital. Her shoes squished and squeaked like a duck as she ran to the ICU part of the
humungous hospital.
If anyone had yelled at her to slow down, she didn't notice. Everything around her was a
blur, like a picture out of focus. She finally skitted to a halt at the receptionist desk,
panting for breath. A woman in her thirties frowned at the site of Raven, who now looked
like a soggy rodent. She was wearing the standard blue, hospital scrubs and a name tag.
Her obviously dyed, honey colored hair was pulled back in a low ponytail.
"Can I help you?" she questioned, slightly antagonistic.
"Yes, tell me what room Lance Bass is staying in", Raven demanded. The woman glanced
down at the pile of paperwork on her desk and then back at Raven.
"Are you a relative of the patient?" she questioned. Raven shook her head.
"No, I'm his...I'm his girlfriend", Raven informed. The lady sighed.
"I'm sorry but only relatives can visit right now."
Raven gritted her teeth. "Ok...well can you tell me about his condition?"
"I'm sorry. That's classified information only the doctors and his parents are allowed to
know", the women answered.
Raven leaned closer, squeezing the life out of the counter top. She needed to see Lance.
She needed to have his arms around her again. She needed every moment with him
because for all she knew, it might be her last. Tears began to cloud her vision at the
thought of it.
"Listen to me-" Raven paused to take a peek at the woman's name tag. "Listen, Bethany,
the love of my life is somewhere in here, maybe dying as we speak and you're forcing me
to sit outside like someone kind of misbehaved dog? Haven't you ever been in a situation
like mine? Haven't you ever been denied to say the one thing to the one person you love?
Please, just let me see him for at least five minutes. I let him go once but this time, he's not
going anywhere", she firmly concluded.
The woman was silent for a moment then sighed, giving Raven a weary, half-smile. She
went to the right side of the counter and pulled out a manila file from a white filing rack.
She opened the file, flipped through a few papers and then finally pulled one out. Her eyes
scanned the report as she read it to Raven.
"He's doing fine..well as fine as someone in a car crash can be. He's got a broken arm, a
gash on his forehead that requires some stitching, a cracked rib and the usual cuts and
bruises. Overall, I'd say if no other problems occur, then he'll be out in a few weeks. He's
staying in room 115, down the hall and to the right", Bethany quietly declared, praying no
doctors would walk by and hear her violating the hospital policy.
Raven let out a shaky breath. The worst, luckily had not struck. Lance was going to be
fine; just fine. With all her effort, she managed to give Bethany a smile.
"Thank you. You don't know how much this means to me. I won't be long", Raven
gratefully announced. Bethany gave a soft chuckle.
"Believe me, I know exactly how you're feeling. Take all the time you need", she offered.
"Thank you", Raven replied again and began jogging down the hall to Lance's room. She
finally found the closed door of room 115 and paused, her hand a few centimeters away
from the door handle. What would she say? What if Lance was mad at her? She shook her
head as if it would help clear out any negativity and turned handle and pushed open the
door.
As soon as she saw the site before her, she had to let back the urge to gasp. It was if
someone had galvanized her heart with a thousand bolts of electricity. The electricity sent
white-hot sparks prickling through each vein and nerve, making the florescent lights a little
brighter, the sound of Lance's heart steadily beating, shown by the blips on the heart
monitor and reality a little harsher. Lance literally looked like he had been thrown down a
fifty foot cliff.
She closed the door and on wobbly legs, made her way to him. She pulled up a chair and
dragged it next to the bed; staring at him. Lance was in the traditional hospital gown,
tucked into bed, the covers pulled up to his waist.
His eyes were closed, probably lost in a deep sleep. A angry, brick red, thick scratch
started at his right temple and stopped at the bottom of his chin. A million tiny, blazing red
scratches were on both of his arms and his hands. There was a split in the middle of his lip
but fortunately, Raven noticed it wasn't deep enough to require stitches. A white, cotton
bandage covered his forehead, hiding the gash Bethany had informed her on. His right arm
was already plastered up in a cast, leaving only his fingers free. Present on his left arm, in
addition to the collection of scratches, was a black and navy blue bruise the size of a golf
ball. An IV stand stood next to the bed; a thin tube connected to the needle in his arm.
The unshed tears that she had experienced earlier found their way to the surface and there
was nothing she could to stop them.
[I did this. I did this to him. I know I wasn't the one who hit him but if I hadn't rejected his
apology, if I hadn't been so chicken, he wouldn't have gone out in the rain to find me.
None of this wouldn't have happened.]
She slowly reached over and gently ran her index finger along the scratch on his temple,
following it to his chin like the course of a river.
"I know you can't hear me and if were awake, you probably wouldn't want to listen. But
I'm going to take this opportunity to say some things I should have said before, ok?"
Raven whispered through her tears.
She placed her hand over his and gave a genuine smile for the first time in what seemed
like light years.
"I remember the first time you talked to me. It was something new and exciting but I
definitely didn't want you to know. I couldn't let you see what I was feeling or I would be
the weak one. So I told you off when really all I wanted was to talk to you a little more. I
remember the first time you kissed me; I was in heaven. And I now I'm thinking about the
first time I realized that I love you. There's only one person in this world for someone; that
somebody we're meant for, that somebody we lay awake at night, dreaming about,
thinking about our future kid's names, even though we don't know what we'll be wearing
tomorrow."
She laughed to get rid of the tension built up inside of her.
"So you see, that's why I can't let you go. You're the only one for me, Lance. I can't let
you go; I just can't", Raven finished. Until that very moment, Raven didn't truly realize
what being in love with someone meant. But as she confessed her deepest and inner most
thoughts to Lance, the idea suddenly clicked.
You didn't choose love, love chose you. It was an invisible force that pulled two people
together and it was the invisible force that kept them together. Love was like a law,
written deep in the stars that only the Angels could see. Raven just hoped his love for her
would be stronger than any of the anger he had.
She carefully rested her head on his chest, gazing towards the window.
"If only you could have heard me", she murmured. Suddenly, she let out a yelp as a hand
began stroking back her hair. Raven quickly lifted her head from his chest and drew back a
bit, staring at Lance's smiling face.
"I did hear you", he replied. Raven softly laughed.
"You did? But I thought you were asleep."
"I was...except then I woke up when you started to talk. I knew it was you so I kept my
mouth shut and pretended to be asleep", Lance confessed, his eyes sparkling.
"Are you feeling ok? How's your rib?" Raven demand.
"I'm fine. I went into surgery as soon as I arrived at the hospital; that's why I was sleeping.
All the pain killers and stuff to knock me out made me a little drowsy and lightheaded,
afterwards", Lance informed.
"Oh...should I go then? I mean, if you're sleepy then I don't-"
Lance held up a hand to silence her.
"Stay. Please. Besides, I think having you here is making me better quicker", Lance
requested with a grin. Raven laughed, then turned serious.
"You aren't mad at me, are you?" Raven questioned, fearing he'd say yes. Lance shook his
head.
"No. Why would I be at you?" Lance asked, confused. Raven glanced down and then back
at him.
"Because, you were coming to see me and you got hit. If I hadn't acted like such a bitch
then none of this wouldn't have happened", Raven explained.
"Raven, you had every right to be mad at me. I don't blame you. But it's not your fault I'm
in the hospital. You had nothing to do with that", Lance reassured. Raven nodded, his
comforting words unable to change her opinion.
"I know but still...I feel...responsible. After everything I've done to you, how can I make it
up to you?" she gravely asked.
Lance thought for a moment, a sly grin crossing his features.
"Well, there is one thing you could do right now", Lance suggested. Raven's eyes widened
and lit up. She leaned forward.
"Really? How?"
Lance inched forward in his bed, their noses touching. Their hearts both began to
accelerate.
"By doing this." And with those words, he captured her lips in a passionate, deep, long
overdue kiss.
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