"Um..what's wrong?" she abruptly demanded, determined not to let her eyes portray her true feelings. She slid back a little, retracting the tight space between them.
He ran a hand through his hair, causing Vanessa to fight back the savage instinct to push him against the bus wall and deliver a kiss. He was wearing a pair of baggy, Aeropostale jeans, a red American Eagle T-shirt the color of the red stripe on a candy cane and a pair of Nikes. The fact that this made him appear even more irresistible didn't exactly help the situation either.
"What happened to us?" he curiously asked.
[What happened was you decided to marry that Abercombie & Fitch Bitch and forget about me] Vanessa bitterly thought.
She crossed her arms over her chest, throwing Lance a deadly glare.
"You're a smart guy, I think you can figure that out for yourself," she icily guessed.
"I'm not talking about our lack of communication the past six years, I'm talking about Bridget," Lance snapped. He was tired of being patient to her childish labyrinth. Sick of the games she constantly decided to play, all he wanted was the straight of truth.
"What about her? Forget to tell me when the wedding date was?" Vanessa vehemently flouted.
"God damn it Vanessa, will you cut the bull shit and start to act like an adult?" Lance dauntlessly shouted.
Vanessa narrowed her eyes, the pensive expression having completely vanished.
"An adult? You're the one acting like a ninth grader; juggling two girls because you can't decided which one you want to drop!" she exclaimed, the ferocity in her voice bubbling like volcano lava.
"Juggling two girls? I'm only engaged to one; what other one are you talking about?" Lance sharply demanded.
"ME," Vanessa shrieked.
Lance opened his mouth to fire back a response, but his voice faltered. Was she right? From the moment they had met again, had he been subconsciously stringing Vanessa along? He racked his brain for a legitimate opposing view but he found none. His mind wandered back to the almost-kissing incident in the club, last week. What had possessed him to act so irrationally? He loved Vanessa but only as a friend....or did he?
He locked eyes with her and she smirked, as if to say "you know I'm right, admit it." He glanced away and focused on her lips. Soft, voluptuous and slathered in strawberry lipgloss; lips that ached for a kiss...
"Are you going to say something or stare at me all day?" Vanessa suddenly and sharply replied.
Lance suddenly was thrown back into reality, eradicating his earlier thoughts.
"Don't flatter yourself," he retorted.
"I just don't understand you, Lance. I always thought you were the sensible one. But yet, you're insisting on marrying that skank!" Vanessa seethed.
"Skank? You haven't even talked to her for more than two seconds! You know, you should quit lying to yourself. You're just jealous," Lance gruffly stated.
Vanessa made a face like she'd been drinking a glass of pure lemon juice.
"Jealous?! Me?! What the hell does she have that I would be jealous of?" she shouted, horrified.
Lance laughed.
"It's simple. She has something you don't have and it kills you. It kills you to the point that you'll do anything to eliminate what's been taunting you all along; the truth," Lance smugly reasoned.
Vanessa snorted.
"Oh? And what's your diagnosis, Dr. Bass," she demanded. He quickly inched forward, closing the space between them. He pressed his nose against hers, her ragged intake of breath sharp as an Exacto knife.
Widening as large as Olympic size swimming pools, those chocolate brown eyes of hers swallowed his heart and any resentful feelings. The invisible electricity between them crackled in the air, each yearning to make a move but both to afraid to do so.
Silence engulfed the room for what seemed like hours until he spoke again, his voice coming out hoarse.
"You're jealous of her. You're jealous because now that I'm engaged to Bridget, you can't have me."
"I-I-I," Vanessa stuttered, "you're right," she whispered.
Lance pulled away and slowly smiled.
"See, that wasn't so hard was it. You're so stubborn, you know that?" he replied. Vanessa let out an uneasy laugh.
"I guess so. I mean, you've known me since we were kids," she agreed, a smile beginning to find its way onto her face.
He reached over and brushed a curl that had strayed from the ponytail she gathered her hair in, away from her face, tucking it behind her ear. It hovered there for a few more seconds, then quickly dropped to his side.
"Nessa, you're my best friend. And no one is going to diminish what we have. Nothing's going to change our friendship now that I'm getting married," Lance confidently assured.
Vanessa's smile abruptly dropped off her face and slammed onto the tour bus floor. Her body stiffened as though she were a corpse and a light obliterated in her eyes.
[FRIENDS? That's all? I thought he was talking about something more...I can't believe this. After he almost tried to kiss me, all I am to him is just a few photos in the scrapbook?]
"Friends?" she slowly asked, as if the word was a sin.
He nodded, confused.
"Yeah..friends. That's what we are Vanessa, best friends," he confirmed.
She tried not to wince as a newly sharpened dagger twisted into the center of her heart. Couldn't he see she wanted to be more than his friend? Gillian could see it, the rest of the guys could probably see it, the whole damn world most likely could see it. So why couldn't he?
"But I.." she trailed off.
"But what?" Lance questioned.
[Say it Vanessa, it's now or never. Say what you're feeling in your heart], she urged.
An image came to mind. An image of bliss; Lance was done on one knee, a grin the size of the entire USA pasted on his face. He slowly slipped a diamond ring onto her shaking finger, then kissed her hand.
"Oh my God, Lance," she heard herself say. He smiled at her, gloating at the fact she'd been so surprised.
"I love you. I always have and I always will."
Then his lips crashed against hers into a kiss. And then the image faded into thin air, as a realization came to mind. Lance didn't love her. Of course, he cared about her and in a sense, loved her. But it was only as a friend. A friend and nothing more. Lance deserved to be happy and being happy didn't involve her.
"Vanessa? What is it?" Lance demanded. Vanessa shook her head, a weak smile plastered on her face. She had to be strong even if her entire world had just been pulverized at the fact the man she loved would never love her back.
"It's nothing. I just wanted to..um..say sorry for acting like such a bitch this past week," she lied.
He laughed.
"It's ok. I wasn't being such a great friend, either," he reassured. Vanessa laughed.
"So you really love her?" she solemnly asked, referring to Bridget. Lance grinned.
"Yeah, Nessa, I do. She's sweet and smart and funny and I'm just lucky I found her," he babbled.
"I'm happy for you, Lance," Vanessa answered, mentally kicking herself for not being able to express her true feelings.
"Thanks. You know, I'm really lucky to have you, too. I really hope everything's cool between us, now. I wouldn't want to lose such an awesome friendship," Lance confessed.
The urge to gag increased, the word friendship acting like salt on a bleeding wound. She nodded.
"Yeah. Everything's cool," she replied. He smiled. She inwardly swooned. He looked at the DVD cabinet and then back at her.
"So, this trip is gonna be mighty long. I say we watch a few movies," he suggested.
"Sure. As long as I get to pick first," she ordered. He shrugged.
"Ok, I don't care. As long as it isn't Bring It On," he answered. She laughed despite the fact she felt like crying.
"I promise, it won't be Bring It On," she vowed. She got up from her spot on the couch and walked
the short distance to the DVD selection. After rummaging around the cabinet for a few minutes, she picked out a DVD. Then, she turned on the DVD player, popped in the disk, closed it, grabbed the remote, then settled onto the couch, not bothering to sit far away from Lance.
To her surprise and delight, he lazily wrapped his arm around her shoulder. She sadly smiled, knowing this would be the closest she would get to a kiss and carefully rested her head on his shoulder.
"I'm really sorry for not speaking to you, those past six years," he randomly whispered.
"It's ok", she simply replied. She wanted to brush off the memories of the past and focus on the future, although with the news of Lance's engagement to Bridget, that wasn't looking too good either.
The credits of the DVD began to play on the TV screen.
"No, it's not. I was such an idiot for giving up so easily. I could have lost you," he continued, scolding himself.
"Lance, please. Don't beat yourself up over me. At least you tried. It wasn't your fault Lou was an asshole," she replied.
He chuckled.
"I love you, you know that?" he asked.
[Oh, if only he would say the real thing...but I guess this is as good as it gets.]
"What can I say, I'm a lovable girl," Vanessa joked. He laughed and kissed the top of her head.
"So, what movie did you pick out?" he questioned as the actual movie began. She snuggled closer to him.
"My Best Friend's Wedding."
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