If "My Life" was more like "My Computer"
How much harder would it be?
Would existence really matter
If I was living a "Virtual Reality?"
Opportunities would be endless
No need to fret about making decisions,
Personal relationships won't be so confusing
Just click on "Tools" and then "Opitions."
I'd get in my daily exercise
By hitting "Start" then "Run"
Instead of saving $10.00, hit "Save As" $1,000.00
...Now wouldn't that be fun?
Can't make up my mind about dessert?
Not a problem...Right Click, "Select All."
No need to worry about gaining weight
Just Click On "Uninstall"
With the benefits of "Update"
My wardrobe could get a new look,
I would always Click on "Help"
To never again have to clean or cook.
I couldn't get lost with "Create A Shortcut"
Or better yet...I could just hit "Go To."
My life would never be in disarray
When I Right Click "Undo."
Click "Apply" for make-up or to color my hair
Or for an instant make-over...Hit "Refresh,"
"Alt /Ctrl / Delete" to Re-boot & start over
When I need a break from this mess!
And when the kids get to noisy
Lower the Volume or shut the Speakers off,
With one Click on "Reply All"
I'll never again have to repeat myself.
"Send To" will help with bath & bedtime
"Parental Control"...when losing my temper,
I'll always be able to hit "Thesaurus"
When I need to communicate with my teenagers.
The Virus Scan would detect infections
And prevent everone from every being sick,
Lost keys or lost money would never be an issue
Because "Quick Finder" would do the trick!
Click on "History"
When I can't remember what I ate last night,
Click "Edit," then "Preferences"
To "Create" my Mr. Right.
Right Click for "What's This"
Whenever the car breaks down,
Who cares what's under a hood?
I'll get a new car instantly if I "Upgrade Now."
I could always double click on "Back"
To repeat a good time again,
Or "Hit Any Key To Continue,"
Whenever I don't want a good time to end.
"Safe Mode" would give new meaning to Birth Control,
"Optimal Preferences" would not be a fantasy,
Edit "Privacy Preferences" for when I want to be alone,
I could forget the past whenever I hit "Clear History!"
"Up One Level"-- instant promotion at work
"Send In" when I got something to say,
Better yet, click "Delete"
On all the bills I don't want to pay!
Click on "Start,"..."Find," then "People"
When I want ' my love life ' to improve,
Unwanted ex-husband...Right Click on "Replace"
Better yet...Right Click on "Remove!"
I could add more RAMS for better memory
Click on "Favorite Places" for a mini vacation
I need to purchase another Hard Drive
Because I have yet to make an "Internet Connection!"
