Remove teddy bear from oven and preheat oven to 375.
Melt 1 cup of margarine in a saucepan.
Remove teddy bear from oven and tell Billy, " No No."
Add margarine to 2 cups of sugar.
Take shortening can away from Billy and clean cupboards.
Measure 1/3 cup of cocoa.
Take shortening can away from Billy again and bathe cat.
Apply antiseptic and bandages to scratches sustained while
removing shortening from cat's tail.
Assemble 4 eggs, 2 tsp. vanilla and 1-1/2 cups of sifted flour.
Take smoldering teddy bear from oven and open all doors
and windows for ventilation.
Take telephone away from Billy and assure party on the line
the call was a mistake. Call operator and attempt to have
direct dialed call removed from bill.
Measure 1 tsp salt, 1//2 cup nuts and beat all ingredients well.
Let cat out of the refrigerator.
Pour mixture into well-greased 9x13 inch pan.
Bake 25 minutes.
Rescue the cat and razor away from Billy. Explain to kids
that you have no idea if shaved cats will sunburn.
Throw cat outside while there's still time and he's able to run away.
Frosting
Mix the following in saucepan:
1 cup sugar
1 oz. unsweetened chocolate
1/4 cup margarine
Take the darn teddy bear out of the *^+@%^&* broiler and
throw it away ~ far away !
Answer the door and meekly explain to nice policeman that
you didn't know Billy had slipped out of the house and was
heading to the street. Put Billy into playpen.
Add 1/3 cup of milk, dash of salt and boil, stirring constantly
for 2 minutes.
Answer door and apologize to neighbor for Billy having stuck
a garden hose in man's front door mail slot. Promise to pay
for ruined carpet.
Tie Billy to the clothesline !!!
Remove burnt brownies from oven....