������� Q: How do you upgrade a Yugo car?
������ A: Put in an engine.
������� A. "TRADE IT FOR A TRABBIE"�� (the late great Roosian "people's car")
������� A. "PARK IT NEXT TO A PORTAJOHN.....AND LEAVE IT UNLOCKED"
������� A. "CRUSH IT AND USE IT FOR TRACTION BALLAST IN YOUR BIG DOG 4X4 PICKEMUP TRUCK"
������� Q: Why do Yugos have heated rear windows?
������� A: To keep your hands warm when you're pushing them.

������� Q. What's the difference between a Yugo and the principal's office?
A. It's less embarrassing if your friends see you leaving the principal's
������ office.

������� Q: What goes on pages 4-5 of the Yugo user's manual?
������� A: The train & bus schedule.

������� A man goes to a parts garage:
������� Man: "Can I have a windshield wiper for a Yugo please?"
������� Parts man: "Yeah, that seems like a fair swap."

������� Q: What is the sport-version of Yugo?
������� A: The driver wears Nike shoes.

������� Q: What do you call a Yugo at the top of a hill?
������� A: A miracle.

������� Q: What do you call two Yugos at the top of a hill?
������� A: A mirage.

������� Q: What do you call a Yugo with dual exhausts?
������� A: A wheelbarrow

������� Q: How do you double the value of a Yugo?
������� A: Half fill it with gasoline!

������� Q: How do you make a Yugo look good?
������� A: Park it between two Cadillacs!

������� Q: What to you call a Yugo with brakes?
������� A: Customized.

������� Q: What do you have to do if your Yugo gets in the way of a swarm of killer
������� bees?
������� A: Stop pushing and take refuge into the car.

������� Q: What is the Yugo owner's most ardent wish?
������� A: To buy a car.

������� Q: What do you call a Yugo with a seat belt?
������� A: A rucksack.

������� Q: How do you make a Yugo go faster uphill?
������� A: Throw out the passenger.

������� Q: How do you make a Yugo go faster downhill?
������� A: Turn off the engine.

������� Q: What do you call a Yugo with a flat tire?
������� A: A write off.

������� STOP THE PRESS!!
������� Yugo has announced a new 16 Valve model for 1993.
������� 8 in the engine, 8 in the radio.

������� - I can see you've got a new car - a Yugo!
������� - Yes, I won the second prize in a lottery.
������� - What was the first prize then?
������� - A fruit-basket!

������� Yugo will be introducing three new vehicles next year.�� They will have a moped called an "I Go". They will have a
�������� 4-door called a "We Go". They will also have a new station wagon called the "Y'all Go".

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