| Here's to the darker shade of life |
| Ask me how I feel now...ask me why didn't life just give it a try Tell me why the tears that I shead make me want to cry. There are so many things I wish that I could take back. I've lied to myself for too long and that is a known fact. Leaving without saying "Hello." That's what I hate the most. Not being able to look into your eyes. Wishing that I had you to hold. I am his mother, Bonded by blood, love and hope. I just wish that I could find a better way to cope. But I know there will be a day when I will see you again. And together we will be forever, there will be no end. Somewhere in the heavens there is a light divine. That's where I know your spirit shines. |
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| Venturing so far from home Never looking back. I feel so all alone. I go to sleep at night And dream of a brighter tomorrow. But all I feel lately is not sadness but sorrow. Feeling isolated, not fitting in. I wish that I could find a way to start over again. I hate the way I feel everyday. Its like I wake up in the morning and ask myself, �What kind of mood am I going to be in today?� I feel so lost, like I have totally lost my sense of direction. Going left, right, up and down�and feeling no satisfaction. I wish I could just wake up and know who I am inside. Not feeling all of this confusion and depression. Not typing all of this bullshit down like a fucken confession. Why can�t I do it? I really did try. I gave a lot of effort. And why is it my spirit that suffers? I feel tired and drained. Not looking forward to much. Just getting up and going to work. Basically feeling fucked. I come home and try to get my life together. But it feels like it keeps on going forever. Sit at home and stare at a screen all night. With my free spirit and confined soul always in a fucken fight. Feeling the life in me being sucked out. It sucks because I am too scared to make a stand and fucken shout out! Feeling older, far beyond my years. I am in the prime of my life right�then why am I here in tears? Seeing all the couples around me happy each time I look. Why is it that I feel so left out, to the point that I want to puke! I want to find my reason for being here. I know there is one right? Everyone has their own opinions. And I know that I am not going to find my answer tonight. Feeling like a fuck up, with no encouragement. Feeling like I am falling with no net for enlightment. Everyone is in their own world and really don�t give a shit if I live or die. So for tonight, just for tonight, I chose to go to bed and cry |