Hakkyou
By Scott Douglas Davidson
Warnings: Shounen-ai (male-male situations), swearing, violence, rape, clinical insanity.
Disclaimers: No one here, nor the location, is mine. The pan Chi-chi attacked Kakarotto with is mine, but I don't think I want it any more.
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There was a chill silence hanging in the air across the red mesa. Three figures, four people, all standing in the silence following the question. Gohan stood in stunned silence, Goku had forgotten who Chi-chi was? His own wife? The wonderful, kind, gentle, violent raging maniac that was Chi-chi?
Vegeta was doubled over laughing.
"Whaaat?" Kakarotto asked, a slightly nasally whine unknowingly making him sound exactly like he whom he shared the body with. Vegeta laughed harder.
"You don't know anything about the baka's harpy mate?!" Vegeta clutched his sides, roaring his mirth to the desert.
"Well, he didn't seem to wanna talk about her, and he's bein' pretty quiet now." Kakarotto shrugged "So the baka got himself a mate? I can't feel any life-bonds other then his father bond with the boy here. Oh, and he seems to have a rival bond with you, my prince."
Vegeta shut up.
Rival bond? Goku sounded puzzled.
"Rival bond?" Gohan echoed. Kakarotto stared at the boy, sometimes he and his baka father were entirely too much alike.
"Me an' ouji-sama can explain to you about Saiyajin life bonds some other time kid. I can feel the baka's mate too now, and she's about to land." Kakarotto pointed up to where a hovercar containing Bulma, Chi-chi, Goten, and Trunks was lowering itself from the sky.
Gohan winced.
--- --- ---
"GOHAN! YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO BE STUDYING! IS THIS THE THANKS I GET FOR BUYING YOU ALL THOSE TOP OF THE LINE TEXT-BOOKS AND FINDING THE BEST HIGHSCHOOL AROUND AND TRYING TO GET MY BOY THE EDUCATION HE NEEDS TO GET A GOOD JOB?!" Chi-chi screeched. She didn't stop there, but if I didn't type Bulma's rant I certainly ain't typing Chi-chi's.
Kakarotto, Vegeta and Gohan winced as one.
Uh-oh. Goku stated wisely.
"AND AS FOR YOU!" Chi-chi marched up to Kakarotto, hands on hips and glaring.
"What about me onna?" Kakarotto snarled.
"ONNA?! You've been hanging out with that horrid Vegeta too much! You're coming home this instant and doing all your chores, cleaning the house, and YOU cook dinner tonight!" Chi-chi shook her frying pan threateningly at him.
"I'll just hunt. And you will not call my prince 'horrid'." Kakarotto glared back, his tail thrashing behind him, then added as an afterthought; "Onna."
"GOKU!" Chi-chi screeched and swung her frying pan at Kakarotto's head. Kakarotto simply reached up and grabbed it out of the air, folded it in half, and handed it back to her.
"I'm not the baka. Here's a deal, call me by my proper name and I'll call you by yours." Kakarotto smirked as Chi-chi gaped at her bent frying pan. She looked up... And hit him with the broken cookware.
"THAT WAS MY BEST PAN!" she whacked him on the head repeatedly, shouting obscenities at him "YOU BROKE MY BEST PAN!"
"WELL YOU SHOULDN'T HAVE BEEN TRYING TO HIT PEOPLE WITH IT!" Kakarotto shouted back, trying to shield his head from the deceptively strong blows. Who'd have thought a human onna could be so strong? No wonder she was the baka's mate.
"GOKU! THAT'S IT! COUCH FOR A MONTH AND NO FOOD FOR A WEEK!" Chi-chi shouted the ultimate threat, stopped whacking him on the head, and folded her arms over her chest.
No food?! Goku sounded distressed But I'll starve! I'm already getting hungry!
"Onna, three things. One; my name is not Goku, it's Kakarotto. Two; I can hunt, your threat of no food means nothing to me. Three; from the baka's reaction to your threat, he's with you more for your cooking abilities then from any mate ties. I'm leaving." Kakarotto turned and started away.
"SON GOKU YOU COME BACK HERE THIS-..." Chi-chi stared. Chi-chi blinked, then stared. Chi-chi stared long and hard. Then, just for variety, she stared a little. And then she went back to staring.
"WHEN DID YOUR TAIL GROW BACK?! THAT'S WHAT'S MAKING YOU ACT LIKE THIS! YOU'RE GETTING IT CUT OFF THIS INSTANT!" Chi-chi pulled out a meat cleaver. Don't ask me why she had a meat cleaver, she must have been keeping it in pan space for emergencies.
Kakarotto yelped and clutched his tail protectively against his side.
"ONNA! You're that cruel?! How 'bout I chop off one of your arms?!" Kakarotto snapped at her, cradling his tail and backing away from the crazed woman.
...Lemme talk to her, I wanna keep the tail too, it feels right. Goku pushed slightly for control, almost surprised when Kakarotto let him right out.
"Chi-chi, calm down honey, I'm back." Goku put up his hands in a warding gesture "Kakarotto's gone. You can put the meat cleaver down now..."
"YOU SAID YOU'D CHOP OFF MY ARM A SECOND AGO!" Chi-chi screeched. Goku gulped.
"That wasn't me!" he futilely tried to defend himself. Chi-chi raised her bent pan to hit him on the head, when Vegeta stood between them, the pan crushed in one of his fists.
"Onna, you have no right to deal punishment to my subjects. I suggest you leave. Now." the prince snarled at her.
"VEGETA!" Bulma finally got the chibis to stop trying to fly the hovercar themselves, and she stomped up, grabbing Vegeta by the arm and trying to drag him away. Vegeta planted his feet firmly and lifted his arm, letting Bulma dangle in the air, swearing colorfully and loudly at him.
"The brat studies enough, he could probably outdo all those scholars you want him to grow up to be like. Kakarotto and the baka are not your slaves to do whatever you want them to do. That baka mate of yours is a grown man, and not a retarded child. And I am the prince of all Saiyajin, and Kakarotto is a Saiyajin, and therefore my subject! I will decide myself whether he deserves punishment, and the worst punishment would be to let you or the onna drag him away! You do not dictate us, humans." Vegeta lashed his tail angrily, grabbed Goku and Gohan by the collar, and blasted off, away from the two women.
"DAD!" Goten and Trunks called out, taking off after the two full Saiyajin once they saw them leaving.
"GOTEN! TRUNKS! YOU TWO GET BACK HERE RIGHT NOW OR YOU ARE SO GROUNDED!" Bulma and Chi-chi bellowed at the sky. Goten and Trunks didn't hear them.
"GOHAN! YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO BE STUDYING! IS THIS THE THANKS I GET FOR BUYING YOU ALL THOSE TOP OF THE LINE TEXT-BOOKS AND FINDING THE BEST HIGHSCHOOL AROUND AND TRYING TO GET MY BOY THE EDUCATION HE NEEDS TO GET A GOOD JOB?!" Chi-chi screeched. She didn't stop there, but if I didn't type Bulma's rant I certainly ain't typing Chi-chi's.
Kakarotto, Vegeta and Gohan winced as one.
Uh-oh. Goku stated wisely.
"AND AS FOR YOU!" Chi-chi marched up to Kakarotto, hands on hips and glaring.
"What about me onna?" Kakarotto snarled.
"ONNA?! You've been hanging out with that horrid Vegeta too much! You're coming home this instant and doing all your chores, cleaning the house, and YOU cook dinner tonight!" Chi-chi shook her frying pan threateningly at him.
"I'll just hunt. And you will not call my prince 'horrid'." Kakarotto glared back, his tail thrashing behind him, then added as an afterthought; "Onna."
"GOKU!" Chi-chi screeched and swung her frying pan at Kakarotto's head. Kakarotto simply reached up and grabbed it out of the air, folded it in half, and handed it back to her.
"I'm not the baka. Here's a deal, call me by my proper name and I'll call you by yours." Kakarotto smirked as Chi-chi gaped at her bent frying pan. She looked up... And hit him with the broken cookware.
"THAT WAS MY BEST PAN!" she whacked him on the head repeatedly, shouting obscenities at him "YOU BROKE MY BEST PAN!"
"WELL YOU SHOULDN'T HAVE BEEN TRYING TO HIT PEOPLE WITH IT!" Kakarotto shouted back, trying to shield his head from the deceptively strong blows. Who'd have thought a human onna could be so strong? No wonder she was the baka's mate.
"GOKU! THAT'S IT! COUCH FOR A MONTH AND NO FOOD FOR A WEEK!" Chi-chi shouted the ultimate threat, stopped whacking him on the head, and folded her arms over her chest.
No food?! Goku sounded distressed But I'll starve! I'm already getting hungry!
"Onna, three things. One; my name is not Goku, it's Kakarotto. Two; I can hunt, your threat of no food means nothing to me. Three; from the baka's reaction to your threat, he's with you more for your cooking abilities then from any mate ties. I'm leaving." Kakarotto turned and started away.
"SON GOKU YOU COME BACK HERE THIS-..." Chi-chi stared. Chi-chi blinked, then stared. Chi-chi stared long and hard. Then, just for variety, she stared a little. And then she went back to staring.
"WHEN DID YOUR TAIL GROW BACK?! THAT'S WHAT'S MAKING YOU ACT LIKE THIS! YOU'RE GETTING IT CUT OFF THIS INSTANT!" Chi-chi pulled out a meat cleaver. Don't ask me why she had a meat cleaver, she must have been keeping it in pan space for emergencies.
Kakarotto yelped and clutched his tail protectively against his side.
"ONNA! You're that cruel?! How 'bout I chop off one of your arms?!" Kakarotto snapped at her, cradling his tail and backing away from the crazed woman.
...Lemme talk to her, I wanna keep the tail too, it feels right. Goku pushed slightly for control, almost surprised when Kakarotto let him right out.
"Chi-chi, calm down honey, I'm back." Goku put up his hands in a warding gesture "Kakarotto's gone. You can put the meat cleaver down now..."
"YOU SAID YOU'D CHOP OFF MY ARM A SECOND AGO!" Chi-chi screeched. Goku gulped.
"That wasn't me!" he futilely tried to defend himself. Chi-chi raised her bent pan to hit him on the head, when Vegeta stood between them, the pan crushed in one of his fists.
"Onna, you have no right to deal punishment to my subjects. I suggest you leave. Now." the prince snarled at her.
"VEGETA!" Bulma finally got the chibis to stop trying to fly the hovercar themselves, and she stomped up, grabbing Vegeta by the arm and trying to drag him away. Vegeta planted his feet firmly and lifted his arm, letting Bulma dangle in the air, swearing colorfully and loudly at him.
"The brat studies enough, he could probably outdo all those scholars you want him to grow up to be like. Kakarotto and the baka are not your slaves to do whatever you want them to do. That baka mate of yours is a grown man, and not a retarded child. And I am the prince of all Saiyajin, and Kakarotto is a Saiyajin, and therefore my subject! I will decide myself whether he deserves punishment, and the worst punishment would be to let you or the onna drag him away! You do not dictate us, humans." Vegeta lashed his tail angrily, grabbed Goku and Gohan by the collar, and blasted off, away from the two women.
"DAD!" Goten and Trunks called out, taking off after the two full Saiyajin once they saw them leaving.
"GOTEN! TRUNKS! YOU TWO GET BACK HERE RIGHT NOW OR YOU ARE SO GROUNDED!" Bulma and Chi-chi bellowed at the sky. Goten and Trunks didn't hear them.
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Anything you want to send me, save a virus, please email to me.
Thank you, and remember; love means never having to say 'put down that meant cleaver'.
Anything you want to send me, save a virus, please email to me.
Thank you, and remember; love means never having to say 'put down that meant cleaver'.
