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Umit Koseoglu
Teachers are evil. It's a proven fact. Well by me anyway. It's so cruel the way they give us loads of homework. They hate us so they want to make us suffer. Here are some ways to make them pay...
* Steal their chair. They hate it when their chair goes missing and they find a pupil sitting on it. If they give you a dirty look, just smile sweetly and they'll leave you alone.
* Draw on the whiteboard with permanent marker. I know this seems cruel but they tell us not to draw in our books, so where is our artistic "talent" supposed to go? On their board!
* Write about them in the back of your book. Teachers are so nosy and love reading our notes. Believe me, they hate it when they find you've been bitching about them behind their backs...
* When they speak to you, stare right into their eyes. This really freaks them out and makes them leave you alone.
* If a teacher is late, lock the classroom door. It's so funny to watch a teacher try to open a locked door. Especially if theres a window nearby, then you can see the look on their face!
* At the start of every lesson ask if you can borrow a pen. They'll let you the first few times then after that they'll give you a lecture about bringing your own equiptment - it's hilarious to see them make up crap to prove their point.
* If you're late to a lesson make up a crappy excuse, eg. "Sorry I'm late, my alarm clock didn't go off." If they don't believe you then tell them you have proof and make up some long boring story. That always annoys them, especially if you use the same excuse every time.
* Draw on the table. If the teachers tells you to stay behind and clear it off at break then quickly rub it off. When they ask where it went try and convince them they're insane.
* Ask them pointless questions. My friend asked our History teacher: "Why is England called England?" He was going on about it for ages. Then she said "Why is France called France?" and he started talking about the history of France. It's a great way to waste time.
* Hide the seating plan. Teachers can never remember our names, so they use the seating plan to remind themselves. If it suddenly goes 'missing' then they'll end up calling you by the wrong name. Go along with it. It's hilarious.
PS. If any teachers happen to read this then no offence. I'm just pissed off with the teacher who invented exams.!