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| I haven't written anything that is actually informative or educational in a while. In keeping with my original goals of teaching as well as entertaining, I present to you, my "How-to" page... |
| You're out driving. You go a little over the speed limit and suddenly a cop car is behind you. Lights flash and sirens sound. And not even the sexy sirens. No, this is the kind of siren that sounds doom... well...actually the other sirens weren't that friendly... i digress. The next thing you know, you have a speeding ticket. Many of us have been through this scenario. Some of us more than once... or even twice... or even three times. What many people don't know is that there is a method that, if followed closely, will allow you to leave the scene without a speeding ticket. |
| (1.) Remember to be polite. If you give the officer attitude, your chances of getting ticketed are increased two-hundred fold. |
| (2.) When the officer approaches, roll down your window and smile. (fig.1) |
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| (3.) The police officer will ask you for your driver's license, registration, and proof of insurance. (fig.2) |
| (4.) Smile as you tell the policeman that your information is located "under the seat next to a gun and a big bag of crack." (fig.3) * |
| (fig.1) |
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| (5.) As the cop draws his gun, tell him that you were only kidding, you keep your gun in the glove box. |
| * note: do not accidentally pull out cocaine in your rush to ice the cop. (fig.4) |
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| (fig.2) |
| (fig.3) |
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| (fig.4) |