Kelly A. Hammond

Occupation : Administrative Assistant

Date of birth : March 26, 1974

Marital status : Single (Engaged to be married)

Education : Bachelor of Arts in Communications from Cheyney University of Pennslyvania

Interests : Writing, Reading, traveling, and collecting antiques.

Personal statement : I enjoy expressing myself through writing and I hope that my words entertain and inform

people. Etc. I live in Philadelphia, PA United States

 

 

It's hard to wake up alone

feeling as if all of your friends

have gone on to better things

and more interesting people

while you languish in the agony

of loneliness and the strange

comfort of an almost suicidal

depression that won't let up

no matter what you do or say

to get the thought of ending it

all out of your head.

 

Going throughout your day

wondering if you really would

be better off dead because

this world just doesn't feel

right anymore and no matter

what you do or say or try

to accomplish, you fall on

your ass because failure

has tripped you once again.

 

So when the night falls

and you find yourself in the

bathroom opening up your

medicine closet trying to

figure out what will take the

pain away permanently without

the mess of waking up from

vomiting and you decide that

a bottle of Tylenol PM and

and Pepto Bismal will work

with a fifth of Straight Gin

to wash it all down.

 

But first you have to write

the last letter or note you'll

ever write and try not to

have anyone feel guilty about

your decision, but believing

that this is the right thing to do

to relieve them of the burden

of you and all of your baggage

that you have carried into

every relationship, leaving you

to wonder why they've ran as

far away from you as they could.

 

The letter is written and placed

somewhere it will be seen easily

after your pitiful remains are discovered

and carried away to be discarded as you

have wished, because you saw no need for

a funeral because who wants to mourn and

cry over a pile of trash anyway.

You run the final bubble bath and pick up the

pills and the pepto and the fifth of gin and

slowly you begin on the path of the kind of

peace you believe a self snuff will finally

bring, hoping that it is soon because

you are soo, soo, tired.

And hopefully, you have come to your end.

 

8/8/2003

 

Sometimes I wish

 

 

Sometimes I wish

that I could fly away from this world

and into the next.

Then I could live in peace

free from the unending pain

that lives deep within me.

All I want is to live in peace.

 

Sometimes I wish

that I could just disappear

and re-invent myself elsewhere.

Then I could do all the things

that I wanted to do

without the discouraging words

of those who think they know me

and finally put my past behind me

All I want is a fresh start.

 

Sometimes I wish

that I could just find true happiness

and finally have the peace that I crave

Then I wouldn't care about the past pain

and the self-doubt and then I could fly

into a new world of happiness and real

peace.

Sometimes all that keeps us going

are our wishes and dreams.