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| A Weeping Soul It is the seventh day of the week, a day that was once considered to be a day of rest. As I gaze into the sky, I ask myself, when will the sky ever stop releasing it's forlorn tears. My own mood mimics what nature is imposing upon us. This morning, the wind was very blustery and had swept in from the South East causing leaves to be blown down from the tree's branches. A sense of serenity has not crept into my soul today, and for this reason I hope the rain will soon stop. Not long from now, winter will find it's way here and I know that my life shall be a long duration of loneliness, solitude and quietude. All kinds of work shall be in abundance, which will keep me busy until the snow covers the land. Regardless of the quantity of work that could keep one busy around the clock, just will not fulfill nor replenish the requirements necessary to feed the soul. My soul needs mending because it can be described as being broken, empty, hollow and continues to leak out whatever happiness seeks to manifest itself within. I will forever seek answers by analyzing myself, whether the results are right or wrong. All thoughts and feelings that make up the person that is me, have been dissected and studied and when the time is right, I hope the puzzle of my life will no longer contain gray areas that are difficult to understand. Human existence and other life in general, my own opinion only, will always be missing or contain broken links within the chain of life. A question in my mind right now is, who gives any one human being the upper hand or right to judge other human beings? Why is there so much suffering amongst humans and also with animals, while others suffer minimally or not at all? However, I am not a Psychologist, Doctor, Scientist, nor a Professor and according to the bottom line, I am devoid of an education and expertise on this topic, which is required to form a logical hypothesis so that my queries about life can be answered. Most of the time, I rely on my instinct and gut feelings, when dealing with day to day living. Needless to say, I am taught that we must live by the standards and rules which were created by man. My story continues into another day and it was when I was cleaning up in the garden, that I had another great urge to write. I have just realized that a lesson has been learned by me and I had overlooked this feat in the past. As deficient of education that I am, I still wish to pass on the lesson that I have learned from my youngest daughter. All mortal humans should pay attention and be in tune to all reactions of young children from infancy until maybe about five years of age. During this span of life, I believe they relay realistic and genuine emotions whether it is happiness or fear, when they are around people or animals. At this time they are not yet ruined by rules taught to them in our artificial world. They react or behave with their inborn instincts whether it is good or bad behavior. A number of years ago my daughter proved this hypothesis, but I did not connect with her instincts until a year ago. I had a glimpse of what she saw and felt and now know the experiment has a conclusion. With no doubt, I am not a perfect human being and do manage to relay many negatives that I don't except of myself. Other forces sometimes influence and changes the real me. Selfishness is another trait that is not desirable and I find it very difficult to forgive within my fellow humans. We all make mistakes sometimes in our lives and I think that some of them could or can be avoided without messing up other human lives. Who gives some humans the power to ruin and or control another's life, which could result into a negative force, that could cause one to struggle for their sanity in order to survive what life deals out. However life is getting better and I can only state that being a positive survivor makes for a better life. |
