Disclaimer: Everything BtVS and AtS is owned by Joss, ME, and all them over there. Everything Anita Blake is owned by Laurell K. Hamilton
Chapter 1
Willow was sitting in the Magic Box with Buffy, her mind drifting back to last night. She had her back against the wall with her eyes facing the door. Buffy was sitting in front of her, telling her about...something. Truth be told, she wasn't really listening. As she watched her, she could see her lips moving but that was it. Willow made sure to nod when she thought appropriately and Buffy seemed to be content with that.
Willow couldn't keep her thoughts away from Spike. Away from last night. She knew that what happened was only a one time thing. And she knew it wasn't about her. He had just wanted someone. Hell, anyone would have probably done. But that didn't mean she didn't have a desire deep in her body for him. Desire? What the hell is she thinking? <It will never happen again. And I don't want it to happen again. Right?> Before she could ponder on these thoughts anymore, she heard the bell over the front door ring. As she looked up at the door, she noticed Buffy had turned around too.
When Buffy saw Spike walking through the door, she rolled her eyes and focused her attention back on Willow. "Can't someone stake him already?"
"Aw...Slayer, didn't know you cared."
"I don't. Don't you have any other interests besides annoying us? You really are moving up on my stake-worthy chart."
Spike started to smirk while he let his eyes gaze over Willow's body. "Actually, I do have a new interest." He caught her eyes with his and held onto the moment before she turned away.
"Good. Go. Far away from here. Find your...interest and do whatever. Just don't come around here."
"Actually Slayer, that's not bad advice. My thoughts weren't far from that exact thing." He saw Willow's eyes widened and took that as his cue to leave. Without another word, he headed out the door and into the night.
Hours later Willow found herself finishing up patrol with Xander and Buffy. After they decided they were finished for the evening, they stood there for a moment just talking. "Don't worry," Willow told them. "I'll be fine getting home. I'm not that far away from my house."
"I know. I just worry," Buffy told her. "Shopping tomorrow?"
"Yeah. What time?"
"Hmm...about eleven. We can get some lunch and then hit the stores."
"What fun," Willow remarked sarcastically.
"Please?" Buffy pleaded.
"Ok, ok, I'll go. I'll meet you at the mall at eleven." She saw Buffy's smile and watched Xander leave with Buffy until they disappeared around the corner. She turned around and started walking the opposite direction, towards her house. Willow was unaware of the pair of blue eyes watching her from the alley.
Willow hadn't even take five steps before she felt an arm go around her waist and another hand over her mouth to smother her screams. She felt herself being pulled into the alley. Willow tried to fight her attacker but it was of no use.
He leaned down to whisper in her ear. "Go on and fight, luv. I like the struggle."
Recognizing the voice, she quit struggling. Willow bit down on his hand hard and smiled when he let go.
"Minx," he growled. Spike pushed her roughly against the wall. "Want to play, do you?"
"Look, I'm not up for your games right now."
Spike smirked and placed his hands against the wall on either side of her body, trapping her in. "But baby," he purred. "I play so well." He leaned down and kissed her neck gently, hearing a sigh of contentment escape her lips. "Content, are we?"
"Yeah," she replied softly. "Wait no. No. This is not going to happen."
"And what is exactly you think we're doing, luv?"
"Nothing is gonna happen. No looks. No glances. No kisses. And no...no sex!"
"That's not what you were saying last night. You were begging for me not to stop." When she didn't say anything, he continued. "You do a spell, witch?"
"A spell?"
"Yeah, a spell. Wouldn't be the first time." Spike raised his hand and grazed the side of her face. "Can't get you out of my bloody mind. You surround my thoughts. And last night..."
"Last night was a mistake. I was...well you were drunk!"
"Wasn't drunk, luv."
"A little over half the bottle was gone."
"The bottle was only half full when I started."
It took a moment for that piece of information to sink in. "But...what...why...why did..."
"Why did I shag you? You were..."
"Convenient," she admitted sadly.
He grabbed her chin roughly causing her to gasp and look at him. "It's not like that. It's...I need you."
"You don't need me. You need someone. Let me go."
"I don't wanna." He pressed his body against hers. "I wanna play," he whispered.
tbc
Chapter 2
"Play?" she asked him. "No...no. We're not...playing. I don't want to play," she told him but hesitated to push him away.
"Don't you?" He pressed his body closer to hers and smirked. "And you're fighting so hard against me, luv. The protesting is just too much," he replied sarcastically.
"Let me go," she almost growled.
"Not gonna happen," he told her seriously. "Ever," he whispered.
Willow rolled her eyes and pushed him back hard, watching him stumble a few steps backwards. "Don't. Just don't. We both know who you really want. You want..."
"Don't say her name," he growled. "I don't want the bitch."
"Don't play this game, Spike. Listen, last night we comforted each other. That's it! Don't read into it. Leave me alone." Willow took a couple of steps toward the end of the alley, only to find herself being gently pushed against the wall.
"Can't do that, luv. This bloody game ends when I say it ends, Witch. And it's far from over."
"I won't let you use me just because you're not with Buffy."
"Didn't you use me to forget about your witch?" A wave of emotions washed over her. "You're right. I did. That was MY mistake. One I won't be making again."
Spike continued to pin her body to the wall. "And you think I'm just gonna let you leave. That I'm just gonna let you walk away."
"I don't want you, Spike."
"Is that what you're telling yourself? So I haven't crossed your thoughts all day? You haven't thought about what we did last night at all?" Spike took a step towards her, pressing his body against hers. "I thought about you," he whispered into her ear. "I thought about every bloody moment. The way you felt under my touch. The fire inside you." When he felt her hands slide up his arms, he leaned down and placed a soft kiss on the curve of her neck. "I haven't thought about anything else except for you, Willow."
Willow looked up into his eyes and saw them clouded with emotions. She let her hands slide up his arms and into his hair and pulled his head to hers. She then pressed her lips to his, showing Spike her need for him. Spike took control of the kiss and deepened it, melting into her touch. The kiss started to become rough and needing. He tasted every bit of her, savoring the taste that was Willow. He let his hands glide down her body, touching her everywhere. When he let his hands start to glide, he had let go of his grip on the redhead. She could have easily pushed him away. Instead she drifted her hands under his shirt, along his back; trying to pull him even closer to her body.
Willow suddenly pulled away from the kiss and dropped her hands. "We can't do this," she told him breathless.
Spike took a step back. "Right. I've heard that speech more than once."
"We just can't!"
"You mean you won't. Tell me you didn't enjoy last night. Tell me I didn't touch something inside of you. Something emotionally." He waited for a response but never received one. "You weren't hesitant last night with me, luv."
"Spike..."
"Think whatever you want. This thing between us, this game. This is just the beginning," he told her.
"We can't do this. We can't use each other. I'm not her and I don't want to use you like that."
Spike started to get angry. "I only fucked the girl twice and you act...you act like I was in love with the chit. It's not always about love, sometimes it's only about a fuck." His words hit her hard.
"Maybe then that's all I was to you," she said softly, voicing her fear. She saw his eyes flash golden but she didn't care. Willow took a deep breath. "I don't want you there because you're convenient and I refuse to be some cheap thrill for you." She paused for a few moments and then started to walk away. Suddenly she stopped.
"Even if I want to take comfort in you," she whispered. "Because I do." Willow resumed walking away from him and out into the night air. tbc
Chapter 3
Spike watched her leave the alley and closed his eyes for a moment. He had been so close. So bloody close and now she was gone. He reopened his eyes and took a cigarette from his pocket. Lighting it, he walked out of the alley and headed towards the crypt.
Willow made it to her house and slammed the door behind her. She never knew he could invoke so many emotions inside her. Walking over to the couch, she grabbed the blanket that was draped over the end and wrapped it around her body. As she stretched out on the couch, she kicked off her shoes and let her mind wander. She tried to push all thoughts of him out of her mind. She tried to forget what had happened between them. She tried to forget what had happened in the alley.
"Sleep," she mumbled to herself. "I just need some sleep." Willow lay on her side and closed her eyes, willing her body to rest. And for some reason she just couldn't. She just lay there, even after the sun came up. When the phone rang that morning, she glanced at the clock, noting that it was only nine in the morning. "Hello."
"Hey Wills, it's Buffy."
"I know, I know. Shopping at eleven."
"Actually I gotta cancel."
"Cancel? Shopping? Buff, are you feeling alright?"
"Giles has it in his mind that we need to up our Slayer/Watcher time. He called me at seven in the morning! Seven! Do you know anyone who was up at seven? No one but me!" Buffy took a deep breath. "Anyways he wanted me to ask you since we weren't going shopping if you could come and research earlier."
"Naw. Just basic stuff. He's doing the full research watcher thing."
"Great," she mumbled. "I guess I'll see you soon."
"Yeah, if I'm out of the chains." Buffy didn't hear Willow say anything. "You know that was a figure of speech, right?"
"Yeah, Buff I know. I'll see you soon."
"Bye."
"Bye."
Willow hung up the phone and kicked off the blanket. Pulling herself off the couch, she headed into the bathroom, thankful for the hot shower she was about to have.
About three hours later, Willow walked into the Magic Box with her laptop draped over her shoulder. Seeing Buffy being grilled by Giles on the other side of the room brought a small smile to her face. It reminded her of high school.
Buffy couldn't believe Giles was acting this way. She had been the Slayer for a while and now all of a sudden he wanted more training. She rolled her eyes at this notion. As she turned her head slightly, she saw Willow. Buffy turned back to her watcher and cut him off in mid sentence. "Willows here and I am so in need of a break." Before he could answer, she jumped up and headed towards her friend. As she approached Willow, she gave her a warm smile. "I am so glad you're here. He's driving me crazy. And since this is my first break, let's sit down."
After they both sat down, Willow glanced at Giles and then at Buffy. "How long have you been training?"
"None. I've listened to him talk for three hours though. And he's making that clucking sound." Buffy saw Willow's grin and couldn't help but to smile. "Enough about me. Tell me about you."
"What about me?"
"You look like hell."
"Gee, thanks Buffy."
"What's wrong? Are you ok?"
"I'm fine. I just...I just didn't sleep that well. Actually I didn't sleep at all. And before you ask, I just had some stuff on my mind."
Spike had been standing in the doorway behind the two girls, listening to their conversation. "And what might that be pet?" he smirked.
As Buffy turned around to insult Spike, Willow closed her eyes for a moment. "Don't you have something else to do Spike?" Buffy asked. "Maybe sleeping or playing with a stake. I'm sure I could give you a few ideas."
"I'm touched that you would think of me, Slayer."
"Think about dusting you."
"Don't you have to spend some Slayer/Watcher time with Rupert?"
"Buffy your break is up," Giles yelled from across the room.
Hearing his order, she moaned as she got up. "I really hate this."
As Spike watched Buffy walk away, he took a deep breath and sat next to Willow. He watched as she grabbed a book and started to leaf through the pages. "Want something to drink, luv? Soda or something?"
"Not from you. If I'm thirsty, I'll get up and get it."
"Right," Spike told her with a nod from his head. After a couple more moments, Spike turned and looked at Willow. "You can't just ignore me forever."
"Watch me," she said softly. Willow focused back to her book until Buffy walked over to her.
"Hey Wills, it's time for patrol."
"Thank goddess, I can't wait..."
"You're not going," Buffy told her.
"What?"
"You haven't gotten any sleep. You won't be alert. And Giles thinks he and I should go. I swear this is torture." Buffy then turned to Spike. "Which means you stay here and watch over Willow." Without another word, Buffy walked away from them, grabbing a stake on her way out the door.
"Just bloody great," Spike mumbled.
Willow slammed her book shut and placed it on the table. "I don't know what you're all upset over." Willow stood up and grabbed her bag.
"Where do you think you're going?"
"Home and away from you."
Spike grabbed her wrist, ignoring the pain in his head. "Sit," he ordered her. When she made no movement, he tried again. "Sit," he growled. Hearing the growl, she promptly sat down next to him. "Since we're both stuck here, the least you could do is talk to me Red."
"I have nothing to say."
"How about why you didn't sleep?"
"You heard."
"I did. You had something on your mind."
"Yeah, so?"
"Something like me?" Spike asked hopefully.
It was at this time Willow realized Spike still hand his hand around her wrist. Quickly she brought her wrist back to her body, causing him to let go. "And why would you be on my mind?" she asked bravely.
Spike leaned back into the couch and took a chance. "Because you were on my bloody mind all night."
"Funny, Spike. But I don't like this game."
"Game? Is that what you think this is? A bloody game?"
"What else would it be?" she asked softly almost hoping he didn't her.
He saw her start to move off the couch when he placed his hand on her shoulder, halting her movements. "Maybe I thought about you all night because I WANTED to. Because I feel something for you."
Willow turned her head to look directly at him. "Highly doubtful."
"How far do you plan on pushing me away, luv? How long are you gonna pretend that there isn't something between us?"
"There isn't," she told him sadly.
"How long are you gonna try to convince yourself of that." Spike placed two fingers under her chin and turned her head to face him. "Don't push me away," he pleaded. "I need you, Willow. Always."
Willow stood up quickly. "I really should go."
"Red..."
"I don't want to be something you settle for, Spike. I-I can't be here right now." Willow quickly ran out of the shop and into the darkness.
tbc
Chapter 4
Spike was wearing only his jeans with the top button undone. He had shed the rest of his clothes and was now lying on his side on his bed, leafing through a book that had caught his interest. He wondered about the redhead. What she was doing now? And why was she continuing to push him away. When he heard the crypt door open, he put his book down and jumped up. Seeing Willow enter his crypt sent a look of shock to his face.
After she entered the room, she took the stake out of her pocket and threw it to the other side of the room. Willow glided over to Spike and put her arms around his neck, smashing her lips against his.
Spike pulled back for a moment. "What are you doing here?"
Willow let her fingers play with the ends of his hair. "I can't get you out of my mind." Without saying anything else, she kissed him again forcefully, begging for entrance into his mouth.
Spike slightly opened his mouth, allowing the witch what she was begging for. As he began to taste her, he deepened the kiss, taking control. The kiss was full of need and want. There was nothing slow between them.
When Willow felt Spike take control of the kiss, she reached for the zipper of his jeans. The kisses that were once rough and forced were now hard and quick. He couldn't get enough of her and she had no plans of stopping him. Spike leaned back when he felt his jeans pushed over his hips. He took the ends of her shirt and pulled it over her head, throwing the garment to the floor. "No bra luv," he whispered.
"Why bother? It would just end up on the floor." As she watched him kick off his jeans, she tore out of her own; feeling his arms snake around her waist moments later. As she felt his lips flutter across her neck, she needed to hear the words. "Tell me," she pleaded.
Spike halted his movements and looked at her. "Tell you?"
"That you need me," she said in barely a whisper.
He could feel his body respond to her with that one statement. He held her closer, pressing her body to his. He started to nip at her neck until he made his way to her ear. "I need you," he whispered. "I need you so much."
Hearing his words, she started kissing his neck, which only drove him crazier.Willow stopped kissing him and looked up into his eyes with a grin. She placed her hands on his chest and pushed him backwards until he was backed up against the wall. Willow reached her lips to his and started a slow passionate kiss that grew with need.
As Spike felt the kiss intensify, he let his hands glide over the rest of her body. He switched their places so that she was the one against the wall. His lips left hers and he started to nip at her neck. Spike felt her hands on the back of his neck. "Spike," she pleaded.
He looked up and into her eyes seeing the want for him. He slid his hands under her ass and picked her up, sliding her down on his cock. Their eyes never left each other. He took a step towards the wall using it to help him balance her as he felt her arms go around his neck. Spike felt her hands slip down to grab his arms as she started to kiss his neck. He growled lowly as he started to thrust inside of her.
Willow let go of any mental barriers that she had had with Spike. Giving into the sensations he was building within her, she started to moan his name.
Hearing his name on her lips, he quickened his thrusts, sending himself deeper inside her. "Spike...so close," she panted.
"Tell me," he grunted.
"I need you," she whispered. "I want you."
Hearing the words, he slowed down his movements, barely moving inside her. Hearing her whimpering, he placed a small kiss on her lips. "We're not done yet," he whispered. Spike walked over to the bed, still embedded in Willow. He laid both of them down on the bed as he hovered over Willow.
When Willow felt the silk sheets under her, she relaxed even more. "Spike...need you," she whimpered.
"I need you too baby." He let his tongue graze across her nipple for a moment before he kissed his way back up to her neck. He saw Willow reach for the headboard to keep her body still. He reached his hands up and interlocked their fingers, holding her hands to the bed. He started to move slowly within her, letting her feel every movement between them. Hearing her moan, he thrust into her a little faster. As he sank into her, she arched her body up to his.
Willow knew he was driving her crazy. She wanted him to just take her and he had turned it into something more. Something emotional. As she felt his mouth on her neck, she arched her back to meet the rest of his body.
When he felt her body arch, he let go of her hands and brought them up under her back, holding her close to him. "I need you always," he whispered. He felt her hands slide up his back and decided he didn't want to hold back anymore. "Tell me you need me," he growled.
"I need you, Spike. I need you so much."
Hearing the words spill from her lips, he started to pound into her. And much to his surprise she was meeting each and every thrust. "Willow," he moaned into her ear. Willow lifted her legs a bit, giving him a new angle. He sunk even deeper into her. As he heard her scream out his name when her orgasm hit, he decided not to hold back anymore. He morphed and shot deep inside her while holding her body close to his. As he morphed, he growled her name against her throat.
Spike collapsed against her after his orgasm had hit. His head was now resting against her chest. When their breathing had become normal again, he lifted his head to look at her. He slid out of her and climbed up her body, smiling when she leaned into him.
Willow turned on her side and stared at Spike for a moment. She smiled as he tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. "Hi."
Spike smirked. "Hi."
"I couldn't get you out of my head."
"Not necessarily a bad thing, luv. I haven't been able to forget about you either."
Willow didn't want the awkward silence she was sure that would follow. "I should go...back home." Willow sat up but was stopped when Spike placed his hand on her arm.
"NO!"
"Spike..."
"Stay with me for a bit. Don't leave yet. For me?" He watched as Willow laid back down on the bed. He draped the silk sheet over their bodies and leaned partially over her. "I'm not ready for this moment to end, Red. And it will when you walk out that door. We'll go back to...to whatever was going on before and I'll just want you that much more." He leaned down and placed a soft kiss on her lips. As he leaned back, he knew he had to ask. "Stay for a bit?"
"I'll stay," she whispered. After a few moments passed, she turned on her side and snuggled into his chest. She wanted to tell him that being with him made her feel content. Happy. Instead she said nothing. Deep down inside she felt as if he'd rather be with someone else other than her.
tbc
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