Disclaimer: Everything BtVS and AtS is owned by Joss, ME, and all them over there. Everything Anita Blake is owned by Laurell K. Hamilton

Two Weeks

Day 1

I'm standing in front of the shop; I should just open the bloody door. I've got to stop being such a poof and just go in. All that makes logical sense of course. But what about the part of me that says they only tolerated me because of the slayer and she wasn't here now. Worse what if they blamed me. I was supposed to protect Dawn, and I didn't. I let that damn demon throw me off of that tower. What the hell, I'm going in.

I'm walking in; the Watcher looks up and sees me but doesn't say anything. Anya's walking over to me.

�Are you going to buy something Spike?� She asks.

�No.�

�That's unpatriotic.� She stated.

�What?� I reply confused. �Oh, bloody hell, I'm not American.�

�Oh yeah.�

Red's coming this way now, well at least she usually makes sense.

�Hello Spike.�

�Hi Red.�

�Did you need something? You haven't been here since�� She says nervously.

�No, I mean well.� I start.

Bloody hell, why do I sound like a nervous teen-ager.

�I'm here because I heard you guys have decided to fight evil without the Slayer.� I said.

�Oh. Yeah right we are.� Willow said not sure what I was getting at.

�I thought you might need some help.� I finish.

�Really, oh my god, Spike really.�

�Well sure.�

�We didn't think you would you know� still be interested in fighting evil without Buffy.�

�It may have started because of her. But I want to help you with this I really do.� I say.

I still can't believe I want to fight evil. I am evil. I'm supposed to be the Big Bad.
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Spike came into the shop. I wonder what he wants. He looks so nervous. Not like him at all. I'm just going to go over there and ask him. Oh god, Anya's over there now. She's telling him he's un-American. I swear I will never understand what Xander sees in her. I better go rescue him before she starts her lecture on capitalism. Hate to have his chip activate because he tries to kill her.


Wow, he wants to help us patrol. He wants to fight evil. I thought about going to see him about patrolling before but figured he wouldn't be interested. Who would've thought the Big Bad would decide to fight evil instead of creating it.

At least this means I don't have to patrol with Giles anymore. He doesn't want to patrol anyway, but he thinks it's too dangerous for me to patrol alone. Xander patrols with Anya so that leaves me with Tara but she still isn't really up to it. So she stays home with Dawn. That means Giles has to go with me. But I'm sure he'll be glad to let Spike take over that job.

�Giles Spike wants to patrol with us.� I call to him as he comes down the stairs.

�Really.� Giles says eyeing the vampire suspiciously.

�Bloody hell Watcher. I want to help. I promised the Slayer I would protect her sister. The best way I can do that is to help fight evil.� Spike says.

Spikes getting angry. I hope they don't make him so mad he leaves. I think all the stuff about just doing it because he promised Buffy is a lie anyway. He wants to help.
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Why the bloody hell don't they ever believe me. I offer to help, for free I might add, and they act like I plan on killing all of them. They need my help. They can fight alone, but they will get much farther with some super human strength if they face anything really bad.

At least Red believes me. She seems to want my help. I never could understand why she's so insecure. Well at least she got rid of the ex-demon. She's pulling me over to the table to tell Harris. Yeah like he's going to be happy about this.

�Spikes going to help us Xander.� She says so enthusiastically.

�What?� The boy says.

�Spike wants to patrol with us.� Willow says more slowly.

�No. I don't want dead-boy junior out at night with me.�

�Fine he'll patrol with me.� I hear the witch say.

�That's crazy Will. He. Is. Evil.� Xander says to her.

�He says he wants to help. What does he have to do to prove he changed, does he actually need to let the next hell god kill him for you to believe him.� She says angrily.

She's defending me. I don't think anyone has ever done that before. Not really. Great now here comes the Watcher again.

�That's enough Xander. If Spike wants to help, we need all the help we can get. Until he gives us reason to not trust him, I think he has proven he can be of service.�

Well not exactly a glowing recommendation but at least he's not staking me.

�Spike we have all begun training. Since we all patrol we all need to train. Xander and Anya have been training and patrolling together and I have been training and patrolling with Willow. I think it best if maybe you take my place with Willow for the time being. That is if it's okay with her.� He said.

�That's fine.� Willow says to Giles.

So I will patrol with Red. That is definitely better than patrolling with Xander or Giles.
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I changed out of my skirt and into my patrolling clothes. I've decided to wait for Spike downstairs. He said he would come and get me, instead of me walking to his crypt alone after dark. Oh, he's already here.

�Hey, you're early.� I say as I reach the bottom of the steps.

�I know I left right after sunset.� He says.

�You could have come upstairs, I would have gotten ready sooner.�

�It wasn't a problem.� He says watching me, �You ready?�

�Lets go.� I say.

We head outside and back toward the cemetery.

One of us should probably say something. We haven't said a word in like ten minutes.

�Spike, can I ask you a question?� I decide I might as well start.

�What?� He asks. He stops walking and looks at me.

Great now I'm nervous. Why did he have to look at me?

�Well, Buffy said you told her about before� when you were human.�

�Yeah, what of it?� Okay why is he getting defensive now?

�She said what you told her. That you were different than you are now, that she thought you had been hurt, that's why you are the way you are now?�
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Great Buffy told her I was a poof. No wonder she always looks at me like that.

�I wasn't different.� I say.

I sound angrier than I should. I know that. She's just trying to talk to me.

�She said you wrote poetry.�

�Yeah. So.� I respond.

�Spike she thought you were different then. Not in a bad way.� The witch is saying.

�I wasn't a poof.�

�Didn't say you were. Tell me about the girl. The one that hurt you. Tell me what happened.�

God why does she want to know this. I should just tell her to sod off. That would be the smart thing.

�You really want to here this Red?� I ask instead.

�Yeah.�

We start walking again. Only now I'm telling her about my life. She wants to know everything. She wants to know about when I was a little boy. About my mum, and my sisters. I tell her everything she wants to know. I answered all her questions. I tell her about Cecily. Only unlike Buffy she expresses sympathy. She says tells me that Cecily was a fool.
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I can't believe he told me all this. He is smart. He was sensitive. Actually I think he still is. I can see in his eyes that it still hurts him, what the girl said to him, what all those people said. That was a hundred years ago and it still bothers him. I do think that's why he's the way he is. God now I feel so bad for the way we treated him after Buffy found out that he loved her. He had been trying back then he really had. And we all turned around and treated him like dirt.

�I can't believe she was so cruel to you Spike.� I say.

�It was a long time ago.� He says, �It doesn't matter anymore.�

�It does. Feelings always matter.�

�Yeah, right.�

�I'm sorry Spike.� I finally say.

�For what?� He asks.

�The way we all treated you. After Buffy told us about�� I trail off.

�I don't blame you. I can imagine how it must have all sounded when she told you.� He says. �Anyway it didn't hurt as bad as when she��

�She what?� I ask.

What had Buffy done that caused him that much pain?
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I can't believe I told her all this. I can't believe any of this. But it feels good to have someone around that wants to hear what I say. That listens to me. That understands what I say.

�What did Buffy do?� I hear her ask again.

�Nothing, it doesn't matter.� I say, not sure I want to talk about this.

�Spike I want to know, and I told you it matters.� This time she stopped walking and grabbed my arm.

�The night I told her that story about Cecily. She took those words and threw them back in my face.� I tell her and turn to walk away.

I hear her running to catch up to me. I slow down and let her catch up.

�Spike she did that, really?� She asks panting.

�Yeah.� I say and continue walking.

�Oh god. I can't believe she hurt you like that.�

God the chit looks like she's going to cry. I don't believe this. I really don't. Someone is crying for me. Me. Hell even Dru in a hundred years never cried for my pain. Caused it sure but never cried.

�I think it's time to take you home.� I say.

�Okay.� She says.

We turn and head back to her dorm. We walk the rest of the way in silence. When we get to her dorm she turns and looks at me.

�Will you train with me tomorrow, it'll be Xander and Anya's night to patrol. So I think it would be a good idea if we train a little. I know it isn't like training with Buffy, I won't really be much of a challenge but I do need the practice even if you don't.� She says without taking a breath.

�Relax Red. I'll train with you. And please quit comparing yourself to the slayer. You can't be her. Ever. But that doesn't me you're not worth anything. You are as strong as she was just in different ways.� I say then I turn and walk away.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Day 2

I walked into the training room. Training, who ever would have thought that me, Willow Rosenberg, would be training to fight? Magic sure, but actual physical fighting. Xander spent the entire afternoon telling me how stupid I was to train with Spike. He'll hurt me. I keep telling him that's ridiculous he can't hurt me even if he wants to. I love Xander but he isn't really very open-minded considering he's dating an ex-demon.

I hear a noise behind me and turn around. Spikes standing there looking at me. Okay I don't look great dressed like this, I'm wearing spandex shorts and a really big t-shirt, but I don't think it renders staring like I have two heads.

�Hi.� I say.

�Hi, ready?� He says moving into the room.

�Yeah, were do you want to start?� I ask.

�Punching bag?� he suggests.

�Okay.�

He grabs the gloves and helps me put them on then moves to hold the bag for me. I know I'm not hitting it hard enough to warrant him needing to hold it but he doesn't say anything.
/////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

God, does she know how she looks in that outfit. No, of course not, we are talking about Red here. She thinks of herself as the ugly duckling. She looks pissed when she sees me looking at her. So I suggest we start with the punching bag.

I hold it still for her. She really does need to work on the punching, she can hit harder than that I'm sure. She just needs some incentive maybe.

�Hey Red, What happened with you and the dog-boy?� I ask.

I already know this answer but maybe it'll get her angry enough to really hit the bag.

�What?� She asks breathing hard.

�Why'd he leave? You not good enough for him? Couldn't please him maybe?� I ask.

�No, I� Couldn't please him? You mean?� she asks.

Its working she is starting to really hit it now. So I just keep egging her on.

�Yeah, you know not woman enough maybe? Or maybe the whole lesbian thing was the problem?� I suggest.

�Spike. I am more than woman enough for him. It wasn't that. It was the wolf thing.� She says and stops hitting.

I move from behind the bag. Damn, she's crying. I didn't mean to do that. She was supposed to get angry, punch the bag or me, but not cry.

�Red, I� don't cry okay.� I say.

�I'm sorry.�

�Right then your turn.�
///////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

Spikes putting on the gloves. I can't believe I cried like that. I should have known better than to let him upset me that way. Okay he says he ready so I move behind the bag.

�You don't have to hold it Red.� He says.

�I can do it.�

So I hold the bag and he starts to hit it. He's not punching hard at all. I know he can it harder than that. I tell him so. He says if he hits hard he'll hurt me and in return the chip will hurt him. So we do this for a while and then stop to rest.

�Want a soda?� I ask, � I would offer you blood but I doubt Giles has any.�

�Sodas fine Luv.� He says sitting on the bench.

We sit down and drink the sodas in silence. After we finished he asked what we were going to do next.

�It doesn't matter. I pretty much need work with everything.� I say.

�Right then. Stakes or hand to hand?� he says.

�Stakes.� I reply.

He walked over to the cabinet and looked through it. Finally finding whatever it was he was looking for he tosses it over to me. I look at it.

�It's plastic.� He says.

�Plastic?�

�Don't want any accidents do we Red?� He says.

�Oh right.� I say embarrassed.

We move on to the mats and begin moving around each other. I lunge for him a couple times and he easily avoids my attacks.

�Gotta be faster Luv.� He says sidestepping my attack.

We do this for a while before I say I need a break, Its getting late now. He suggests we call it a night and offers to walk me home.
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I actually am enjoying working with the witch. She isn't bad at all. She actually could have hit me with that stake a couple times; she just doesn't have enough confidence to attack without hesitating.

We decided to call it a night and I walk her home. We agree on a time to meet tomorrow, this time at the magic shop again instead of her dorm. I leave her at the door and head back to my crypt. I still feel bad about he wolf comments; I really didn't think they would hurt her feelings.

I think what we need to work on her confidence, if she had more confidence she could be a real fighter. She just needs someone to force her to see that. I just need to find a way to make that happen. Well tomorrow we patrol, but the day after we train again. I'm sure I can think of something by then. I grab a bag out of the fridge and empty it into a cup.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Day 3

Tara and I had an argument today. She doesn't want me to patrol with Spike. I think she's jealous. I told her not to be. I love her. I do right? Things have been so different since Buffy died. We fight more. I don't like fighting with her, but she doesn't understand. She says my power scares her. I need to patrol tonight; I need to get away, even just talking to Spike. He understands better than Tara does.

I'm waiting for him at the magic shop; he walks in and looks around. I think he's trying to avoid Anya. Yesterday she tried to lecture him again about being patriotic and spending money. I wave and he walks over too me.

�Ready Red.� He says.

�Sure� I say and rise to leave.

We walk out of the shop and head toward the park tonight. I'm actually hoping to run into some vamps tonight. I need the fight. We didn't have to walk long before this vampire comes out of the bushes and grabs me.
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Bloody hell I can't believe I didn't see him coming. Now I have to dust it without hurting Red. All of a sudden I see him move his hands from her and fly back towards the tree he had been hiding behind. Willow turned and looked at me.

�Wanna stake him please?� She says smiling.

The vampire starts to move forward so I throw the stake at him and we watch him turn to dust.

�Damn, Red that was impressive.� I say.

�Thanks. Can't do much physically but magic can help a lot.�

We continue walking. I decide tonight it's her turn to tell her story, so I ask about her childhood.

�You don't want to hear about it. It's really not that interesting.� She says.

�Yes it is Red. Your life is as interesting as mine I'm sure?� I say.

She starts talking about when she was a little girl. Her life wasn't bad, not really, but her parents weren't exactly up for the number one parent award. She told me about being left with sitters and nannies as a little girl. About meeting Xander in kindergarten. She told me about high school. I couldn't help but think that she had been even bigger of a poof than I was. That is until she met Buffy. I realize she has changed so much since that time.
/////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

He actually wanted to hear about my life. My life, not exactly exciting story there, but he listened.

�So Red when did the magic thing start?� he asks.

�When?� I say, � Not sure really. I guess after I met Buffy. Until then I didn't think magic or vampires or demons were real. They were monster movie stuff you know.�

�Yeah, kind of shocking to find out that the monsters under the bed as a child were real isn't it?� He asks smiling at me.

�Definitely.�

We walked through the park stopping at the playground. We stopped to rest on the swings for a few minutes before heading back home.

�What other little magiks do you have up your sleeve Red?� he asks me.

�What do you mean?� I say not sure what he wants to know.

�Well I know you can do parlor tricks like levitating objects, and the big black magic stuff, from Glory. But what else can you do?�

�Oh. Lots of stuff. Like throwing that vamp. I found out that is a helpful spell for lots of situations. I'm still working on the ball of sunshine idea for patrolling.� I say then realizing I'm patrolling with a vampire, � But I guess that won't work for us uh? Xander and Anya could use it though. Oh and I'm still trying to turn Amy back.�

�Amy?� he asks.

So as we head back to the dorms I tell him about Amy and how she turned herself into a rat. He says he thinks it's cool that I want to try and change her back. We say goodbye when we reach the door and I head inside for bed. We are going to meet after the shop closes tomorrow to train.
___________________________________________________________________________++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Day 4
It's just after sunset so I guess I should head over to the magic shop now. Willows probably already waiting for me. God I hope she's wearing more than she was last time. Those tight little shorts� Right then, I shouldn't be thinking about this, about her, that way. I'm supposed to help her patrol and train that's it right. Not thinking about how cute she looks in those little shorts or little skirts that she wears.

I walk into the shop and see her sitting at the table reading a book. She looks very deep in thought I hate to disturb her. I just watch for a minute.

�Red.� I say quietly moving behind her.

�Oh, Spike, you startled me. I didn't hear you come in.� She says.

She set down her book and stood up. We move into the training room. She's wearing sweat pants today and a sleeveless top. She says she wants to do the bag again. So she grabs the gloves and puts them on.

�Okay this time don't hold back Luv. Remember I can take anything you can dish out.� I tell her.

She starts hitting the bag. She's doing better than before. I can feel the punches this time. We continue for a while until she says she wants a break. She asks if I want I turn, I tell her no. I don't like the bag very much anyway.

She brings over sodas again and we sit down for her to catch her breath. We talk a little about her classes, and she tells me about her argument with Tara. I feel bad. I don't think the other girl is enough for Red though. She is just too mousy.

�Ready?� She asks.

�What are we doing?� I ask her, �Stakes again or hand to hand?�

�Lets try hand to hand this time.� She says.
///////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

Talking to him is getting so easy. He seems to understand. He acts interested in my classes and my magic. He listened to the problems with Tara. He didn't want to do the bag. He says he doesn't like it.

After we are break I chose to do hand to hand instead of stakes. I don't know if that was a good idea or not but too late now.

�Some ground rules here Red.� Spike says to me, � No magic okay?�

�Why?�

�Not fair. We can practice magic another day if you like but if we're practicing hand to hand no magic allowed.� He tells me.

�Fine.� I agree.

We get on the mat and begin circling each other. I mention his chip. I don't want him to get hurt so I can train.

�Won't activate unless I intend to hurt you and I don't.� he explains.

He lunges toward me and I move out of the way. He falls, I can't help but giggle at him on the floor.

�Look I took down the Big Bad.� I say still laughing.

�Think its funny do you Luv?� he says from the floor.

Before I could respond he grabs my leg and pulls me on top of him.
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She let out a small scream when she fell on top of me. I can't believe she moved fast enough to make me fall.

�Now what are you going to do Red?� I ask.

�Well.� She said nervously.

�Come Willow, I told you, you can't hurt me.�

�But�� She starts again.

She moved off of me, and sat up. I stood and pulled her to her feet. Time to get back to training I tell her. We start circling again. She asks me about Dru. She is trying to push me this time. Well fine that works two ways.

�Want to play that way Witch fine.� I say to her, � Still haven't told me about the wolf. Why'd he leave? You weren't woman enough right? Couldn't please him?� I say hoping this time I wouldn't hurt her feelings again.

�I told you I'm plenty woman enough for any man.� She says and lunges for me.

I sidestep her easily and she raises her hand to punch me. I raise my arm blocking the punch from connecting with my chin.

�Prove it� I say smiling at her.

�P-prove it?� She stuttered.

�Yeah.� I say.

We both stop moving and stand facing each other. I smile at her, spreading my arms out at my sides.
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Prove it he said. How the hell do I prove it. God he's just standing there looking at me with that smug look on his face. He doesn't think I'll do anything. He probably thinks I'll just run out of the room or something. Fine he wants to play this game, we'll play this game.

�Okay.� I say and move toward him.

I can't believe I'm doing this. I'm going to kiss Spike. I move closer to him, he's still holding his arms out from his side. I move up against him, and he just stands there not moving a muscle. I reach up and put my arms around his neck. I still can't believe I'm doing this. I pull his head down to mine. I move my lips against his. He's just standing there. I press my lips harder against his. Finally I feel him start to respond and his lips part against mine. I move my tongue inside his mouth, tasting him, feeling him.
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She actually took the challenge. I never thought she would. I'm standing here and she's moving to me. God, she's pulling my head down to hers. Her lips are moving on mine. I want to hold her and feel her, press her against me. But I don't move, this may be the hardest thing I've ever done. I part my lips on hers. Letting her be the aggressor in this game. She thrusts her tongue in my mouth, I feel her moan against my mouth.

I can't take anymore and I move my arms around her. I press her body against mine. I move my tongue against hers, tasting her. I slide my hands over her ass, pulling her against me. I can't stop a groan from escaping my lips as I feel her shift against me. I can't let this go to far. I want her, I didn't know how much until she kissed me but I do want her. What I don't want is for her to regret it later. I don't want her to rush into this.

�Red. Luv. We have to stop.� I say pulling my head away from her.

I'm still not quite ready to move completely away though so I hold her hips against mine. She smiles and moves her hips a little closer.

�If you keep doing that we are not going to stop tonight.� I tell her and let go completely.

�What if I don't want to?� She asks watching closely.

�You do. Trust me.� I tell her, �I think its time I walk you home.�
////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

I know he's right about stopping so I let him walk me home. I can't believe I kissed him like that. I never thought of Spike like that. Not really. I mean sure he's cute, and cool and everything but I never thought of him and me.

When we reach the front of the dorm we stop and turn to each other.

�Patrol tomorrow, meet you here at sunset?� he asks me.

�Yeah.� I agree.

He moves closer and lowers his head to kiss me again. This time he kisses me. His lips are moving on mine, teasing them until they open beneath his. He thrusts his tongue in my mouth and I move my hips against his. I feel his hands on my ass, pressing me closer. Finally he pulls away.

�See you tomorrow Pet.� He says and then walks away into the night.
___________________________________________________________________________++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Day 5

I barely slept today. I kept thinking about last night. Still can't believe she kissed me. I can't believe I wanted her too. Well okay I wanted a hell of a lot more than a kiss. She is a lesbian for god's sake. What was I thinking, hell what was she thinking. Then I kissed her when I took her home. I am really turning into a bloody poof.

Well I guess its time to get ready to patrol. Sun will be setting soon and I said I'd pick her up. I head to the refrigerator for dinner. Not like I want her to see me feed. Yeah that'll impress the hell out of her to watch me drinking a mug full of blood.
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I'm getting dressed for patrol when Tara walked in the room. I turned when I heard the door close behind her.

�Hey.� I say.

�We need to talk Willow.� She says looking a little angry.

�Okay, about what baby?� I ask her.

�Spike.� She says.

�He isn't dangerous we already talked about this.� I say only now I'm getting angry too.

�I saw you last night.� Was all she said.

�Oh.� I don't know what to say.

�Well, want to tell me what was going on? It didn't look like he was forcing that kiss on you?� She says.

�Tara, I don't� I mean he didn't� Oh god.� I say.

�Right. So you don't know why it happened. I thought you loved me. You said you want to be with me, so why were you kissing Spike?�

�It started as a game.� I explained sitting down on the bed. �Then I don't know, it went farther than I expected.�

�So you wanted him to kiss you?� She is really getting mad at me now, but she looks hurt too.

�No, I mean yeah sort of.� I don't know what to say to her.

She just sits there looking at me, she is so hurt I can see it in her eyes. I'm confused myself about last night, so how can I make her understand. I can't tell her it won't happen again, because I'm not that sure I don't want it too. I like him. I liked kissing him. I love Tara though right? But if I really love her could I like Spike kissing me? Then I hear her speaking again, she's making the decision for me.

�I'm moving out Willow. I'm going to stay with a friend the rest of the year, and get my own dorm next year. When you figure out what you want let me know. I do love you, but what ever it is with Spike you need to get over it before we can be together again. I already talked to Giles too. I'm still going to help all of you with Dawn. So I'll be around.�

Then she left, she just walked out. What the hell am I going to do now. God I did the same thing to her that Oz did to me. There's a knock on the door, then it opens and a girl pokes her head in.

�There's a guy down stairs waiting for you.� She says then pulls the door closed as she leaves.
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Something's wrong with Red tonight. I don't know what, she hasn't said two words since we left the dorm. I saw Tara leaving as I walked in so I think it must have something to do with her. Finally I decide I just need to ask. Worst that can happen is she tells me to mind my own business right?

�What's up Red?� I ask finally.

�Nothing.� She answers.

�Right then. If you decide there is something wrong let me know.� I tell her.

Out of the corner of my eye I see something behind a tombstone. Great I can use the fight right now. I move toward it as it stands and rushes at me. I don't have a stake with me. Willow has it and she's standing there like she's never seen a vamp before.

�Red.� I shout at her.

No response. Damn now I'm distracted, she's gonna get us both killed. I turn and hit the vamp in the face. He falls backwards, it gives me a minute so I shout at her again.

�Bloody hell Red the stake please.�

She snaps out of it but it's to late. The vamp is on me again. I feel my face change, I'm in full fight mode now. But it has me from behind. As I struggle with it I see Willow wave her hand toward us and a second later the vamp is dust.

�What the hell did you do?� I ask angrily.

�I uh� threw a branch at him.� She says.

�A branch? How? Never mind, magic.� I say still angry that her distraction almost got us both killed.

�Thank you would be nice.� She says as we start walking again.

�For what?� I ask. �You being so distracted you almost get us both killed. Look whatever is wrong you don't have to tell me if you don't want to but you do have to pay attention.�

Bloody hell, she's crying. Crying. Unbelievable she almost gets me killed and she's crying.
//////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

I'm crying. Because of Tara, because he's right, but not because he yelled at me. I did almost get him killed. If I'm going to patrol I have to pay attention. It's not like I have Buffy's super strength.

�I'm so sorry Spike. I know I'm not good company tonight. And I need to pay attention. But Tara�� I say through the tears.

He stops walking and sits on a headstone and looks at me.

�What about Tara Pet?� He asks cautiously.

�Sh-she left me.� I say.

He reaches out and pulls me closer to him. I'm standing between his thighs now. I rest my head on his shoulder. He's patting my back softly.

�Want to talk about it?� He asks me.

I nod my head against his shoulder and wipe my eyes with my hand.

�She saw us last night. Outside when you were leaving.� I tell him.

He's not saying anything, just waiting for me to continue.

�She moved out. She's going to stay with a friend. She says she'll still help with Dawn and Scooby stuff but�� I say.
//////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

What have I done? What if my little game last night has ended their relationship? What if Red wasn't serious with those kisses? Tara saw them if this was a game I am truly a bastard.

�She just left.� I say.

�She wanted to talk. She wanted to know why we were kissing.� She says.

She's not crying now, but she's not moving away from either. It feels good to hold her this way. Not even about sex this time. I want her yeah, but I also just want to make her feel better, so we stay this way.

�Spike thing is I couldn't promise her it wouldn't happen again. I told her last night was a game that got carried away but I couldn't say it wouldn't happen again.� She says quietly.

It takes a minute for her words to sink into my head. She couldn't say it wouldn't happen again. That means she must want it to, because she can't think I would force anything on her.
///////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

Does he understand what I'm saying to him? He's not moving, not at all. I really need to get used to the vampire not breathing thing. But he is being really still, and quiet. I lift my head a little so I can see his face. He's looking at me.

I move my face closer to his. I see his lips parting as I move closer. I'm really going to do it again. I'm going to kiss him. I press my lips to his. He's pulling me closer to him. I feel his tongue move into my mouth, and his lips moving over mine. He's holding me so close.
////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

This is so wrong, I shouldn't be doing this, and she's upset it's not right. I have to stop this. Okay maybe later, right now she's so close and her lips are moving over mine. I move my hands from her shoulders to her hips pulling her closer to me. I have to stop this, before we� No I can't let that happen.

�Red.� I say pulling my head away.

She groaned and tries pulling my head back down. I want to let her, I really do. No this has to stop.

�Willow, lets go. Its time for you to go home.� I say.

�I want to stay here.� She says quietly.

�Luv, It's time to go home.� I repeat.

�Fine.� She says.

We start walking out of the cemetery. She is still upset but this will all get better in the morning. I'm sure of it. We head across the campus to her dorm. I wait until she goes inside then I turn and head home.
_____________________________________________________________________________++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Day 6

When I got home last night everyone had called me. There were messages from Tara, Giles, Xander, and Dawn. I just didn't want to talk to them. Tara said she was sorry about being so angry but she really did think it was for the best. Everyone else just wanted to know what happened, they had all heard about Tara leaving and wanted to know why and if I was okay. I'll talk to them all today, at the magic shop I'll explain then.

I slept late today, no morning classes. I had two classes this afternoon, I considered skipping them but well I'm me so I went. I couldn't concentrate though, my mind kept going to tonight, what was I going to tell everyone. Tara left because she thinks I love Spike. Do I love Spike? I mean okay, attracted to him sure, but love? Attraction may be enough for now anyway. Then of course is Spike attracted to me? I don't really know, we've kissed and he seemed interested but� What if he was just kissing me because I kissed him? I mean really he's a vampire not exactly overly moral.
//////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

What the hell have I been thinking, that damn witch, I can't get her out of my head. This is worse than the thing with the slayer. At least Buffy didn't encourage me. This is getting so out of hand, the Big Bad isn't supposed feel sorry for someone. But I did last night, I wanted to comfort her, to make her stop crying. I pulled away from the kiss, because she was vulnerable, and I didn't want to take advantage. I've obviously lost my bloody mind.

She really was very upset last night. I hope she's okay. I feel like this was my fault, I goaded her into kissing me, it was supposed to be game, she was right. Then the girl saw her, damn, this really is my fault. But honestly, if she loved Tara that much why was she kissing me, and she did say she couldn't promise it wouldn't happen again, it did happen again. I really am becoming just like the poof.
/////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

Everyone was waiting for me when I walked into the magic shop, well everyone but Tara. Giles said she had been there but had left before I arrived. Tara didn't tell them anything but that we needed time apart, that I had some things I needed to work through.

�Well, yeah I guess that's a good explanation.� I tell them.

�Will. It is not a good one. That is a I don't want to talk about it one.� Xander says.

�We had an argument okay. You all know we've been fighting a lot since Buffy� Anyway she thinks I need to work some things out for myself before we can be together.� I say my eyes filling with tears.

�What things?� Anya asks.

�Anya.� Xander warns her.

�What? Maybe we can help?� Anya tells him.

God she probably does think she is being helpful. But they aren't going to understand if I tell them the problem.

�That's okay. Its some thing I have to do on my own.� I tell her.

�Is it because of the lesbian thing?� She's asking now.

�Sort of.� I tell her.

I don't want to talk about this anymore so I pick up a book and start reading. My mind isn't on this research though. I can't stop thinking about how much I don't want to go back to the dorms tonight. I didn't sleep well last night everything reminded me of Tara. But where else was I going to go. Xander's I don't think so, not with him and Anya� Giles already had his hands full with Dawn.

Time must have flown by because I look up and see the sun setting. Giles is locking the doors and everyone else is clearing out the research books.

�You going to wait here to train with Spike?� Giles asks.

�Yeah. He said he'd be here after dark.� I tell him.

�Fine then lock up when you leave.� He says.

I help everyone finish cleaning up and they leave. Giles and Dawn to head home and Xander and Anya were off to patrol. So I sit here alone waiting for Spike. It isn't long before I spot him walking across the street. I get up to unlock the door to let him in.

�Hi. Can you give me a minute to change out of this skirt?� I ask as he walks in.

�Yeah, no problem.� He says watching me.

I head to the bathroom to change and he heads to the backroom.
///////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

If she changes into anything skimpy I swear I'm going to go insane. Doesn't the chit own a big bulky sweat suit. I hear a sound behind me and turn around. Damn. The spandex shorts again. Is she doing this on purpose? Funny thing I don't really think she is, any other girl sure but she doesn't think she is that attractive.

�Ready.� I say.

�Sure, where are we starting tonight?� She asks.

�Weapons?� I suggest.

Anything but hand to hand, is what I want to say. I don't think I can handle that.

�Ever use the quarterstaff?� I ask her.

�No. Xander and Giles think it's to heavy for me.� She says.

�Nonsense. And it gives you a lot of help later. You probably won't ever fight with a quarterstaff but if you can master it, it gives you a lot of options in a real fight.� I tell her and move to retrieve the weapons.

�How so?�

�You're being attacked, unarmed, but things are lying around. Tree branches, pieces of wood or metal. If you can balance and fight with this then you can use any of those things if you need to.�

I hand her a quarterstaff and demonstrate the proper stance and way to hold it for her. We start sparring. She is a little small for such a large weapon, but it won't hurt her to learn it. She isn't doing that bad really. We keep going with this for a long time before she asks to stop.
////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

Training with Spike is really cool. He doesn't coddle me like the others. He never says you're not ready or that will be to hard for you. He doesn't suggest we stop, he keeps going until I need to stop.

He keeps looking at me kind of funny though. I heard him moan when I first walked in, like something was wrong. He does that every time we train. If I ask why, he changes the subject.

I get us sodas again. I offered to bring blood for him next time but he refused. Says he feeds before he comes over anyway. He also said he likes soda. He doesn't need food like I do, but he enjoys it anyway.

�Are you okay, after last night I mean?� he asks me.

�Last night? Oh, you mean because of Tara?� I ask.

�Yeah. You seemed really upset last night.� He responds.

�It's hard. Part of me knows she's right. We need to be apart. But it doesn't make it easier, everything in the room reminds me of her.� I confess.

�I know, when Dru left. I wanted to stake myself. Everywhere I looked were things that made me think of her.� He says quietly.

�Wow. The Big Bad confessing to being brought down by love.� I tease.

�Love didn't bring me down. It's just�� His sentence trails off.

I look at him, he looks upset maybe I shouldn't have teased him about it. It must be hard to always maintain such a hard cool image like he does.

�Why don't we call it a night Red?� He says standing up. �I'll walk you home.�

Home. I don't want to go there. Probably can't convince him to train all night.

�Something wrong Luv?�

�No, yes. It's just I don't want to go there.� I say to him.
/////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

She doesn't want to go home. Great, what the hell am I supposed to do now.

�What about your parents?� I ask.

�My parents? Yeah that won't work. They won't like me showing up in the middle of the night unannounced.� She says looking defeated.

She looks so sad. I can't make her go home. I know how painful that is. But what am I going to do with her. She can't stay here all night.

�I have a bed in the crypt.� I hear my own voice saying.

What the bloody hell am I doing, telling her she can come home with me? Women don't live in crypts, vampires do. But it's too late to take it back now. She is already over here hugging me and telling me thank you.

�Spike thank you so much. I didn't know you had an actual bed. I thought you slept on that thing.� She says still hugging me. �Oh but what about you, I can't kick you out of your bed.�

�Don't worry about me. I can sleep anywhere okay.� I tell her.

I really must be insane to do this. Obviously competing with Dru now one the lack of sanity issue.

We lock up the shop and head back to the crypt. Takes longer than usual because it is easier to just avoid Xander and Anya.
////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

When we get to Spike's crypt I realize I don't have any clothes or anything. I point this out to him. He says he can go and get me a toothbrush and hairbrush and that kind of thing from the 7-11 but he can't get clothes in the middle of the night. He left to go get the toiletries and I look around the crypt.

Funny I've been here before but never really looked around. I find a t-shirt over by the far wall. I decide he won't mind if I borrow it to sleep in. It should be plenty long enough. So I quickly change clothes. I just finished pulling the shirt over my head when he walks back in carrying a couple bags.

�I think I have everything you need and something for bre�� His voice trails off as he stares at me.

�I didn't think you'd mind if I borrowed� Never mind I'll change.�

�No, I don't mind. It's just that�� He says.

He is still staring at me though. I take the bags from him and he moves to turn away quickly. He really is acting strange.
//////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////_

The damn chit is wearing my t-shirt. Okay that isn't so much the problem as that is all she seems to be wearing. And she's acting like she's fully clothed. This is going to be a very long night.

She's taking the bags. She's going to see� That isn't going to work I have to work on self-control so I turn away from her.

�There are donuts in the bag too. I thought you might be hungry in the morning. I hope I got every thing you need.� I say when I turn back to face her.

She's going through the bags looking at all the items.

�Thanks again Spike.� She says smiling at me.

�I know you must be tired. C'mon I'll show you where the bed is.� I say and open the passageway.

I start down the steps with her following behind me. We reach the bed and she looks at me again. I really need her to just get in that bed and go to sleep.

�Spike I really don't feel right taking your bed. I'll sleep on the floor.� She says.

�I told you it's not a problem. I've slept in worse places than this floor.�

�No I can't let you sleep on the floor Spike it's not right. This bed is huge. We can both fit on it.� She suggests.

Right now she's competing with Dru on the sanity issue.

�Spike either we share the bed or I sleep on the floor.� She says crossing her arms.

�Fine lets just get some sleep then.� I tell her angrily and move to the other side of the bed.

I have completely lost my mind. How the hell am I going to sleep tonight, with her half dressed right next to me? I hear a sound next to me and turn to look at her, she is sound asleep. This is really amazing.
___________________________________________________________________________++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Day 7

I rolled over and reached across the bed for Tara. My hand landed on someone but it wasn't Tara, her body is soft and this is well, hard. It takes a minute for me to realize what was going on. Then I remembered it was Spike. I didn't want to go home last night, and then I insisted he sleep in the bed not on the floor. Funny thing is I slept really well last night, better than I have in a long time. I can see the clock over his shoulder, its still early. I don't have classes today so I don't have to get up yet.
///////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

I try to move, that's when I realize that someone is lying very close to me. Close, hell she is practically on top of me. She has on arm across my chest and her leg is across the top of my thighs. Her body is pressed so close to mine I can feel her heart beat.

She's still sleeping. Her leg shifts a little higher, and I hold my unneeded breath. Damn, I can feel my erection growing as she shifts trying to find a more comfortable position. I try to move; maybe she'll just roll away, back to her side of the bed. No such luck, she moved her head onto my shoulder now. Her face is inches from mine; I can feel her breath hitting my cheek. I move my arm that is under her to stroke her back. As I move my hand I realize the t-shirt she slept in has risen up on her back, as I move my hand lower on her back I feel the top of her panties. She sighs softly and moves closer to me.

I can't take much more of this, so I turn my head toward hers and press my lips against hers. I feel her body move closer. I shift my body so that she rolls onto her back and move over her. I let my tongue move against her lips, until I feel them open. I move my tongue inside her mouth, tasting her. She moves her arms around my neck pulling my head down, increasing the pressure of my lips on hers.
////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

God, what a way to wake up, I feel his lips moving over mine. I open my mouth to let his tongue in; I can feel myself moan as he rolls us over. His tongue is moving inside my mouth, I'm trying to pull him closer, I don't want this to ever end.

I shift my legs spreading them further apart so now I can feel him between my thighs. His jeans are rubbing against the inside of my thighs. I feel his hand moving down my side, brushing against my breast, I feel my nipple harden as his thumb brushes over it. He's reaching for the bottom of the t-shirt; I feel his hand moving back up, pulling the shirt with it. I feel his fingers reach my breasts, and rub across my nipples.

�Spike,� I hear my voice say.

I can hear him saying something under his breath but I can't understand him. He's moving away from me. I try reaching out for him to pull him back.

�Red, stop we can't do this.� He tells me as he sits on the edge of the bed his back facing me.

�Why?� I ask him as I move to sit next to him.

�Because I�Bloody hell, its not right.� He says.

�Not right? I want to. I could definitely feel that you wanted to. So why isn't it right?� I ask him, beginning to feel a little hurt now.

�You came here because you're upset about Tara. You don't really know what you want right now.�

�I know what I want.� I tell him and try to reach for him again but he moves away, standing up.

�I thought vampire didn't care about morals or what's right or wrong?� I ask him.

�Right. Usually we don't. I can't explain it, but for some reason I can't bring myself to hurt you.� Spike says.

�You wouldn't be hurting me.� I tell him.

�You may not think so now. But later you might. Look Red, I'm not going to deny that I want you. But I'm also not going to rush into something that may just get us both hurt in the end.� He says moving next to me again.
////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

Well she seems to have accepted that explanation. Hell she should it was the truth. If she's still hung up on the girl then this will only hurt her. Hell it's not even like we've had a date.

�Spike, I don't know exactly when I started to see you as anything other than the vampire that helps us for money and is obsessed with the slayer but I do. I don't even think of you as a vampire anymore.�

�But I am a vampire, and you're bloody friends will stake me if I hurt you.� I tell her.

�You're not going to hurt me.� She says.

�My intentions may not matter Luv. I don't plan on hurting you, but did you plan on hurting Tara?�

She sat there silently for a minute and then shook her head slowly.

�We are still patrolling tonight right?� She finally says.

�Yeah. I'll pick you up after dark.�

�All right I better get dressed and go home before anyone looks for me then.� She says quietly.

I grab her arm as she starts to walk away and turn around.

�Do you see the problem? Your friends don't know about any of this do they? How you feel? That we've kissed? Why Tara left?� I ask, I realize how harsh this is sounding to her but she needs to understand.

�N-No� she says quietly.

�If you can't even tell them about what's happened how are you going to deal with a relationship?�

�I'll work on telling them, but you're willing to try a re-relationship?� She asks.

She looks so small and innocent standing here in my arms. I want so badly to do what she keeps saying she wants. But I just let go of her and move away.

�I told you I want you. We can keep seeing each other patrolling and training and maybe after you tell your friends, if you're still interested we can see about moving on.�

She didn't say anything she just walked away to find her clothes. A few minutes later she was gone.
///////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

At least he didn't say he wasn't interested or didn't want me. I still can't believe the Big Bad is worried about my being hurt or my telling my friends. God, telling my friends, that is so not going to be pleasant. Giles I'm sure will be angry in his own British way. But Xander that is going to be the real problem. He couldn't stand the idea of Buffy and Angel, because Angel was a vampire and Angel had a soul. He is going to completely lose it over the idea of Spike and me. Well at least Tara didn't say anything. The only one that may not be a problem is Anya. Hell, she will probably be all for it as long as I say the sex is good.

I open the door to my room and see Xander standing there, looking out the window. When I close the door he turns around and runs to hug me.

�Where have you been?� he says still hugging me.

�Where?� I ask.

�I called you last night a couple times. Then I tried again this morning. When I there was still no answer I tried Giles and your parents. They all said you they hadn't seen you.� Xander said looking at me. �I even went to Spike's crypt but he wasn't there, at least not that I could see.�

�I-I didn't want to come back here last night.� I say hoping he won't press for more information.

�Okay but Will, where were you?� Xander asks.

�I-I uh.� I don't know what to say to him.

While stuttering for a lie he'll believe I realize I'm doing exactly what Spike had said. I can't tell Xander that I spent the night at Spike's crypt even though all we did was sleep, well mostly. We hadn't done anything to hide. I didn't want to go home and he gave me a place to sleep.

�Xander, I couldn't come back here last night, I just couldn't face it again. I told Spike and he�� I start to explain when Xander interrupts.

�Damn him. I'll stake him myself. He had no right, taking advantage�� Xander is yelling now.

�Wait. He didn't take advantage of me. Hell I did my best to get him to�well you know and he sent me home. Said if I couldn't even tell any of you that we were becoming friends that we couldn't become more. Said he didn't want to do something that would end up hurting me.� I tell Xander.

�Spike said he wouldn't hurt you?�

�Yeah. I've been trying all week to get him to�� I say � but he won't, says I don't know what I want because of Tara leaving.�

�Will I still don't like it. Even your being friends with him is dangerous. He is evil.� Xander tell me.

�You don't have to like it Xander. I have to do what makes me happy.�

�Is this why Tara left? Did you tell her you, I hate even saying it, like Spike?� He asks me.

�Sort of.� I tell him. �She saw me�kiss� Spike, it wasn't serious not then but she said I had to find out what it is I want.�

�And you think its Spike?� Xander is asking me looking somewhere between confused and disgusted.

�I don't know. He may be. Maybe it's Tara, or maybe it's someone else. I don't know but I can't find out any other way.� I tell him. �I'm confused too right now, but I need to do this.�

�You're going to do this no matter what I say aren't you?�

�Yeah. I have to.� I tell him.

�Fine then I'll let it go for now but if he hurts you he's dust.� Xander tells me.

I give him a hug and tell him I'll see him at the magic shop in a few hours. Right now I need to shower and change clothes and I have some reading I need to do for class.
///////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

I'm just coming out of the tunnels when I hear the door fly open. I hesitate to come up. The sun is still out and I prefer to not become dust.

�Spike I know you're here somewhere.� I hear a familiar voice shout.

Damn it's Harris. At least its not a serious threat so I step the rest of the way out and close the opening.

�What do you want?� I ask.

�What did you do to Willow?� He says moving toward me.

�I don't see how it's any of you business, but if you want to know about Willow ask Willow.�

�I did but I think she's protecting you. So now I'm asking you.� He says to me grabbing the front of my t-shirt.

�Harris move your hand or chip or no chip I will kill you.�

�Not until you answer me.� He replies, �Did you sleep with Willow?�

I consider this question. Technically speaking I did sleep with Willow, but being reasonably sure that wasn't what he was asking, and Willow had apparently already given him an answer I decided to go with sarcasm.

�My sex life isn't any of your business.� I say smirking at him and pulling his and off my shirt.

�It is if it concerns my friend.�

�If your friend wanted it to be your business she would have told you exactly what happened.� I tell him then grab his shirt forcing him against the wall.

�Whatever Willow told you is probably the truth because I don't think Red could lie if her life depended on it.� I tell him raising him off the ground slightly. �She loves you, you are her best friend, I can't imagine why but you are. I don't want to hurt one of her friends but if you ever try and threaten my again��

�I-I don't want her hurt.� He stutters.

�Either do I. Which is the reason you are not dead right now. Go home think about whatever she told you that got you over here and decided if you think she would lie about it.�

I let him go and he grabs the door and runs away. The threat worked for now at least since he isn't aware that if I even thought about carrying out the threat that damn chip would activate. I must admit she told her friends much quicker than I thought she would.
//////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

Xander must have told everyone about last night because Giles and Dawn decided to wait for Spike to arrive before leaving the magic shop and Xander and Anya stayed in the shop instead of moving to the backroom much longer than was necessary. Shortly after dark the door opened and Spike walked in. Everyone in the room stopped and stared at him. He just stood there waiting; I think he was half expecting a stake to hit him. Finally he walked over and took my hand.

�Ready Luv?� He asks me smirking at Xander as I stood next to him.

When I stood up he leaned over and gently kissed me. When he moved away I saw Xander and Giles both clenching their fists at their sides. Dawn and Anya were both staring at Spike smiling.

�Hey Nibblet.� Spike said to Dawn.

�Hi. I haven't seen you in a while.� She answers still smiling at him.

I'm beginning to see why Dawn has such a big crush on the vampire. At first I thought it was weird but this last week I've realized that Dawn probably saw the side of him that I'm just now starting to see.

�Come visit after school anytime Pet.� He said.

�We better get going.� I say to everyone in the room.

We turn and head out the door. As soon as we were away from the shop he stopped and turned to face me.

�You told them.� Was all he said.

�No, I told Xander, pretty sure he told the rest of them.�

�They looked like they knew and they aren't happy.� He says to me.

�I know but all that matters is that we are right?�

�Right then, lets patrol.� He says and starts to head toward the cemetery.

We walk quietly through the cemetery. Not really much action tonight. Couple of fledglings that Spike easily stakes by himself, we finish the patrol kind of quickly and he starts heading to the dorms. I can't stop thinking about him, why didn't I ever notice how sexy he was before? How confident he is? Okay well that I noticed, just always looked at it more as arrogant. But he really is a great guy, cool, sexy, and confident, if you get past the whole amoral vampire thing.

When we reach my dorm he turns and takes me in his arms pulling me close to him. He lowers his head kissing me gently. He moves his lips over mine until I open to him. He slides his tongue inside and I can taste him. His mouth feels cool compared to� He moves his hands down to my hips pulling them closer to his. I can feel his erection pressing into me. God I don't want him to leave, ever, but I feel him pulling his lips from mine.

�Gotta go Pet.� He says.

�Tomorrow?� I ask still thinking about his kiss.

�Thought we weren't training tomorrow. You said it was a night off.�

�Still want to see you. The Bronze?� I ask hopefully.

�Okay. I'll meet you there.� He says and turns and walks away as I stand there watching him go.
___________________________________________________________________________++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++\
Day 8

I have completely lost my mind. I realized this on my way home last night. I agreed to a date with her. Well not really a date, not like flowers and candy date, but to meet her in a social situation. I'm meeting her at the Bronze in a few hours. I haven't had a date in over a hundred years, I want sex, and I have sex. I'm a vampire I don't date. I am becoming a poof. Worse than Angel.

Time to get ready. I need to shower, change, and eat. Not like they serve blood. Not that I want to do that in front of her anymore anyway. Funny never used to think about it. Did it in front of Buffy because it pissed her off, and disgusted her. That was part of the attraction for us I think. I know she never admitted to an attraction but it was there. We both got off on the fighting. Willow's not like that though.
/////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

I've been thinking about it all day. He agreed to go the Bronze. I don't know what's more shocking for me. That he agreed or that I had the guts to ask. I hope the others don't show up, Xander will cause a problem I know he will.

I'm standing in my closet looking at the clothes. What am I going to wear? I pull out a sweater with a cartoon on the front, no to childish. I pull out a low cut sleeveless shirt; no I'd be to self conscious in that. After pulling out most everything I own, I've decided on a black skirt and a red sleeveless shirt. Stepping back to look in the mirror I realize what I've done. My choice of clothes is likely to match his. I could change but what the hell, might as well go with it. I go into the bathroom to fix my hair and put on makeup.

When I return to my room Tara is there gathering up a few of her things that she didn't take the other day.

�Hi.� I say as I close the door.

She turns and looks at my clothes before speaking.

�Hi. Just needed to get this stuff. Going out tonight?�

�Yeah. Tara I want us to stay friends.� I say I can't stand seeing her looking so hurt.

�I love you Willow. I want you to be happy, if that means Spike instead of me then I'll deal with it, but I can't promise we can be friends.� She tells me as she gathered the rest of her things and walked out the door.

It's starting to get dark so I grab my purse and head out the door.
/////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

I walk into the bar and scan the room, looking for the familiar red hair. Finally I spot her sitting at a table near the pool tables. I am more nervous than I ought to be. I am a hundred and twenty-six years old for God's sake, and I'm nervous about a girl. I decide to go to the bar first.

Drink in hand I head over to where I see Willow sitting, watching a nearby game of pool.

�Hi.� I say as I approach the table.

�Hi. I was beginning to think you weren't coming.� She says smiling at me.

I sit down across from her at the table. She looks so beautiful tonight. Funny thing is I never noticed before, her beauty, maybe because it's more of a quiet beauty. Her shyness hides it sometimes, I think, but tonight she's not dressed to hide her beauty.

�Do you want something to eat?� I suggest.

�No, not really hungry right now.� She said still watching the game next to us.

�Do you want to play?� I ask nodding toward an empty table.

�I don't know how.� She confesses, blushing slightly.

�All the years you've been coming here and you don't know how?�

�Xander tried to teach me once but he gave up.� She says smiling.

�C'mon.� I say taking her hand and pulling her to the table.

I pick up two sticks and hand one to her. I quickly set up the balls on the table.

�Do you know the rules?� I ask her.

�Yeah, that I understood, it's the hitting the ball part that I have trouble with.� She says.

I pull her in front of me, placing her between the table and my body. I move her hands to show her how to hold the stick. She shifts her weight a little, making her ass move against me. I feel my erection beginning as soon as she moves. Maybe this wasn't a good idea.
////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

When I move to stand more comfortably I can feel him against my ass. Embarrassed now I move away a little and grip the stick tighter.

�Loosen you grip Pet.� He whispers in my ear.

I do as he says.

�Now hold this hand steady and pull back with this one and let it slide through you fingers and hit the ball.� He says still whispering in my ear.

I shiver as I feel his hands brush my side as he helps me angle the stick correctly. I hit the ball, and Spike backed away.

�Try on your own now.� He says smiling at me.

I finish my turn and he moves to take his. The game ends quickly and other people are waiting so we head back to our table. Spike leaves to order a flowering onion. When he returns we sit and talk while we eat. The whole evening is going so well. When he's not around the others who seem to go out of their way to provoke he is so different.

�Hey, Will I didn't know you'd be here.� I hear a voice behind me say.

I turn and Xander and Anya are behind me. What are the chances that this can go well? I think to myself.

�Hi. Xander.� I say smiling at him.

�Hello, Spike.� Anya says looking across the table.

�Hello.� Spike answers but doesn't look happy about the company.

Xander and Anya sat down at the table.

�I'll be right back.� I say picking up my purse.

�I'll go with you.� Anya said standing up. �That's what women do.�

I walk away from the table, feeling the blush creeping up my neck.
//////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

She left me at the table alone with Harris. I turn my back to him and fake interest in a nearby game of pool. Damn it's not working I can hear him speaking to me.

�You are so pathetic. You're not fooling anyone, except maybe Willow, you know.� He says to me.

�I'm pathetic?� I say looking at him.

�Yeah. Using her like this.�

�I'm not using her.� I respond the boy is really starting to annoy me.

�Right. You love her. Once she sleeps with you you'll dump her.� Xander is saying, � The only reason you're still around is because she hasn't yet.�

�What makes you say that?� I tell him standing up as I see the girls returning, �I told you what Willow and I do is none of your business.�

As Willow and Anya approach the table I grab Willow's hand.

�Let's dance.� I say as I pull her toward the dance floor.
////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

I'm not sure what's going on, Spike is pulling me to the dance floor. Xander has something to do with this. I don't know what he did, but he did something to make Spike angry.

When we reach the floor a slow song is playing. I see Anya pulling Xander onto the floor. Spike pulls me close to him and begins moving to the music. I can see Xander watching us as he dances with Anya. Spike is moving his hands over my sides. I feel him brush over my breasts and I feel my nipples harden beneath my shirt. Spike must feel it to because he smiles slightly as his hands keep moving down to my hips. He leans down and kisses me as he pulls my hips against him. I can feel him hardening as my hips move against his. His hands slide around to by ass and he's caressing me and pulling me into him as he moves his hips toward me. As our lips part and I open my eyes I see Xander has stopped dancing and is just staring at us. Part of me knows I should go talk to Xander but I can't. Not now, I don't want this dance to end.

�Spike, what are we doing?� I ask him.

�Dancing Pet.� He whispers in my ear.

I feel his tongue tracing a path along the inside of my ear. I shiver slightly and lean closer to him. I move my hands to his head trying to force his lips back to mine. He kisses me again. His tongue is moving inside my mouth. I hear the song ending. Spike is pulling away from me. He's taking my hand and pulling me back to the table.

Anya and Xander are already there. Xander is angry, so angry his face is turning red.

�What the hell was that?� He says as soon as I sit down.

�Dancing.� I say repeating Spike's earlier answer.

�That wasn't dancing, you were practically having sex out there.� Xander says angrily.

�I told you what we do is none of you business Harris.� Spike says to him.

�Spike I think we better go now.� I say to Spike.

I'm still not sure what's happening but I don't want to deal with Spike and Xander fighting. Spike gets up and puts hand on my hip as we walk out. I feel his hand move back to my ass and he turns and smirks at Xander as we walk out.
////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

�Do you plan on telling me what happened in there?� She asks as soon as we are out of the building.

�Dancing.� I repeat my earlier answer.

�No, that was not dancing and you know it. It has something to do with Xander.� She says.

�Just playing with your friend a little Luv.� I respond smiling at her.

�Playing with� Why?�

�He paid me a visit yesterday, and I told him then that what you and I do is none of his business. He started again tonight when you left the table. I decided he needed to learn a lesson.�

�Spike, he is going to be so angry, that you were making him look like a fool.� Willow says softly.

�Only if you tell him the truth Luv.� I tell her and we turn to head back to her dorm.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Day 9

I breeze through my classes today. I am just so happy that I can't concentrate on anything. I can't wait to see Spike tonight. I'm a little concerned though I tried to call Xander but he won't take the calls. Anya just kept telling me he wasn't there. I never meant to hurt him, but Spike is right, what we do is none of Xander's business. I don't like Anya but I stay out of his relationship with her and try my best to get along with her.

We're supposed to train tonight. Spike said he wanted me to meet him at the crypt instead of the magic shop. Said we were going to try something different. I was supposed to be there before dark, but I'm running late and the sun is already starting to set. Damn, I better hurry.

I almost bump into someone as I hurry through the cemetery. When I look up it's a guy from my class. I smile and apologize.

�I'm so sorry. I wasn't watching where I was going.� I say to him.

�No problem.� He says.

I smile and start to hurry past him. I'm almost to the crypt I can see it a few feet ahead.

�Hey where you going?� He says and grabs my arm.

I turn around and see a vampire in full game face. I don't have a stake or holy water or anything else with me. I should have grabbed something when I realized it was going to be dark before I got there. I try to pull away from his grip, but he just tightens his hold. I do the only thing I can think of at the moment and scream.
//////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

I'm just coming out of the tunnels when I hear it. It's a scream. Okay not unusual in a Sunnydale cemetery, but this scream sounds familiar. I hear it again. It's Willow. I drop the things I'm carrying and run outside.

They are only a few feet away. He's holding the struggling girl. He can't quite get enough of a grip to bite. I run toward them. I circle a little so that I come up behind him. I grab his neck and pull him away from her.

�She's mine.� I tell him just before I snap his neck.

As he turns to dust I sit down next to Willow who had fallen to the ground when I grabbed the vampire.

�You okay?� I ask.

�Just scared.� She says quietly, still shaking.

I wrap an arm around her pulling her close to me. We sit that way for a few moment before she speaks.

�Did you mean it? What you said?� She asks turning her head toward me.

�Mean what?� I ask not sure what she's asking.

�You told that vampire that I'm yours.�

�Oh that.� I say. I hadn't really thought about what I was saying. �Yeah, I guess I do.�

She lays her head on my shoulder and I can feel her smiling.

�C'mon lets get you inside.� I say standing up and reaching for her hand.
////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

He said I'm his. He said I'm his. That thought just keeps running through my mind. He said I'm his. That thought makes me so happy. I can feel my anger and fear at the attack subsiding as we walk together to the crypt.

When we walked in, he turned and looked at me. He just stared into my eyes for the longest time. Then he lowered his head and kissed me. The kiss was so gentle. He was pulling me close to him, moving his mouth off my lips to kiss my eyes, and cheeks and he kissed down the side of my face to my neck. As I felt his lips on my neck, I felt his teeth nip at me for just a minute before it was replaced again by a kiss.

�I was so frightened when I heard you scream.� He whispered against my lips.

�So was I.� I whispered back. �I thought he was going to kill me.�

�So did I Luv. I didn't think I could make it to you in time.� He kissed me again.

�We have to train.� I say, not quite willing to break the contact yet though.
//////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

I don't want to train, not now. All I want to do right now is hold her and make sure she's safe. I can't believe I feel this way. I don't remember feeling this way before. Not with Dru, except for the short time she was sick, she was always able to care for herself. Didn't feel this way about Buffy either. I was always sure she would come through fine. Okay maybe I was wrong about that.

�Do you really want to train?� I ask her.

�No.� She answers.

�Lets watch T.V. then.� I suggest.

�Got any good movies.� She asks moving over to the television.

�No, Luv. Want to go rent one?�

�Yeah.� She says, and we head out to the video store.
/////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

We return to the crypt after we rented the movie. We rented Steel Magnolias, I love that movie and Spike said he'd never seen it. Spike found some blankets and Pillows to throw on the floor in front of the T.V. and we put the tape in. Spike sat down in the center of the blanket with his legs extended in front of him. When I moved to sit next to him he pulled me down on the floor between his legs with my back resting against his chest. He settled his arms around me as the movie started.

When the movie ended, I turned to him since he hadn't said much in quite a while. He had been making fun of the movie until Shelby got sick and he hadn't said much after that. When I looked at him I saw tears in his eyes.

�Are you crying?� I ask.

�I don't cry.�

�Well then there's water coming out of your eyes.� I tell him smiling and reaching up to wipe the tears.

�Luv, this is your favorite movie? Couldn't you have picked something happier?� He says.

�I know its sad, but in a good way.� I tell him. �Besides crying is a good thing.�

�I. Am. Not. Crying.� He tells me more slowly this time.

�Fine you're not crying.� I say twisting so that I'm kneeling in front of him.

I lean forward and kiss him. I move my mouth over his until it opens beneath mine and his hands move to my hips holding me steady. I thrust my tongue in his mouth. Tasting him. I love the taste of him. His tongue is tangling with mine, trying to get into my mouth. He's pulling me closer. I feel his hands moving up toward my breasts. I feel them brush against my nipples. My nipples harden at his touch and I groan into his mouth.
//////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

I move my hands back down her sides, looking for the bottom of her shirt. Not breaking the kiss I start to push her shirt up, running my hands against the bare skin as I expose it. I feel myself getting hard. I feel like a teenager. I break the kiss long enough to pull her shirt over her head, before pulling her head back down to mine. I pull away from the kiss, kissing down her neck to her breasts. I lick them through the material of her bra. Feeling her nipples tighten, I gently nipped at the hard nubs. Her hands are reaching behind her to the clasp of her bra. Pulling it off she looked at me for a moment before my head moved back to her now bare breasts.

Her hands are reaching for my shirt, pulling it out of my pants. I let her pull it off as she lowered her head for another kiss. I move us so we are laying down now. I'm leaning over her. She smiles at me. She reaches for me pulling me down to her mouth. She parts her legs so I'm resting between her thighs. I move down her body once again pulling her nipples into my mouth. I hear her moan and she reaches for my head holding me there. Her hips are moving up toward mine, pressing against me. I moan into her breast.

I hear a knock on the door. Bloody hell, I move away from her.

�Ignore it.� She says and tries to pull me back down.

�Luv. Everyone that comes here will pretty much just walk in if I don't answer.� I tell her and kiss her gently.

She grabs her shirt and pulls it over her head. I smile and point to her bra, which she shoves under the blanket as I walk over to the door. I pull it open.

�What the bloody�� I stop when I see Dawn standing outside.

�Spike.� She says.

I grab her and pull her inside.

�What are you doing here?� I ask as Willow walks over to join us.

�I was bored.� She answers. �Giles is boring.�

�Dawn he wouldn't let you come out here at night alone.� Willow says to the girl.

�Well, uh no. He thinks I'm in bed. I snuck out the window.�

�We have to get you home. Giles is going to be so worried and we don't have a phone here.� Willow told her.

�Can't I stay for a while? You know watch you guys train.� She asks hopefully.

�W-We're done training. Spike was just getting ready to take me home.� Willow tells Dawn.
///////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

We walked Dawn home. Giles was not happy about her sneaking off. Mumbling something about bars on the bedroom windows, and removing the trellis. After making sure she was safe we headed back to the dorms.

�I'm sorry about tonight.� I tell Spike.

�No need to be sorry Luv. Hell it's probably better that the nibblet showed up.� He says.

We walk the rest of the way to the dorm in silence. When we reach my building we stop on the porch and he kisses me. We make plans on when to meet tomorrow, and he leaves. I watch him until he's out of sight before I walk inside.
___________________________________________________________________________++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Day 10

I went to see Dawn today. I took the tunnels as far as I could then used a blanket to get the rest of the way to her house. I felt bad about making her go home so quickly last night. But I just wasn't in the mood to entertain her at that moment. When I reached her house I knocked on the door and waited. I could feel the sun starting to burn me through the blanket. Finally the door opened at it was Tara.

�Hello.� She said.

�Hi, can I come in please?� I ask as I feel the smoke on my back.

She looked at me for a minute before she stepped aside. Once inside I dropped the blanket and turned to look at the girl.

�The Nibblet home?� I ask.

�Not yet. Should be in a few minutes.� She answers. �Do you want to wait?�

�If its not a problem.� I tell her.

�No make your self at home.� She says and moves into the kitchen.

I stand there for a minute watching her. This is all hurting her, I can tell. Maybe I should leave. Maybe I should just confront her, Xander had no right to interfere, but in a way Tara does. So I shrug and follow her.

�I never meant of any of this to happen.� I say as I walk into the kitchen.

�Any of what?� She says.

�This thing with Willow. When I went to the shop that day, I still thought I loved Buffy. This was not supposed to happen. You weren't supposed to be hurt.�

�Whether you meant for it to happen or not it did.� She says sitting down, � My only concern is Willow. If you're using her and she is just going to be hurt, then I wish you'd just leave.�

�I don't plan on hurting her. I can't say I love her, I don't know. This is different than anything I've ever experienced. Dru and Buffy were so full of violence and passion. Willow is so calm, but she makes me feel happy, and all I want to do is protect her.� I tell her, surprising myself with the confession.

�Okay then we don't need to talk about it again all right. I'll be fine.� She says and moves to check a pot on the stove. �Do you want to stay for dinner?�

�No thank you. Just want to talk to Dawn for a minute, I feel bad about not letting her hang around more last night.�
/////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

I'm waiting for Spike at the dorms tonight. When I got back from my classes I had a message from him that I had to wait there until he got there. After last night he didn't want me outside after dark alone. I talked to Tara today too. She called and we had a nice talk, she told me she talked to Spike and she really thought he might love me. So if I think Spike will make me happy, then that's what she wants.

I get up to open the door when I hear a knock. Spike is standing in the door smiling when I open it.

�Ready?� he says.

�Want to come in for a minute?� I ask him.

�Love to, but if I come in we probably won't patrol tonight.� He says and takes my hand pulling me out the door.

We walk quietly through the cemetery. Overall the night seems to be uneventful. All of a sudden a group of demons comes out of the bushes. There are at least six of them. Spike threw the stake to the ground, and began hitting them. I tried using magic but it wasn't working. I tried a spell to throw them away from us. That worked and Spike grabbed my arm and started running. He ran into a small building pulling me in with him, pulling the door closed behind us. We could hear the demons outside the building for a few minutes; they must have decided we weren't worth the effort because they left. The room was small. So small that Spike's back was pressed against the back wall, and I was leaning against him with only a couple inches of space between the door and me. Since I was closest to the door I reached out to push it open, but it was stuck.

�Door won't open.� I tell Spike.

�Of course it will.� He says reaching around me to try to open it him self.
/////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

The damn door is stuck. Don't have enough room to kick it in. Barely any room at all. Willow's trying to push the door open again. She needs to stop moving so much. Every time she pushes on the door she pushes back into me.

�Willow.� I finally say.

�Yeah?� She says still pushing her hands against the door.

�Stop that.� I moan.

�How are we going to get out if�� Her voice trails off as I push my hips against her. �Oh.�

�Can you move to the side at all?� I ask her.

Thinking maybe if she isn't in front of me I can push or kick the door harder. She wiggles against me trying to turn her body to the side. After a minute she is standing pressed against the side wall, I move forward and push against he door, still can't get it to budge and there isn't enough room to kick it in.

�I can't get it either.� I tell her.

I step back against the back wall to give her room to move forward again. She wiggles her way in front of me again. This time she's facing me. I try to suppress the groan that is threatening to escape my lips. She keeps wiggling around trying to find a more comfortable position.

�Willow.� I say warningly.

�Sorry.� She says. �What are we going to do now?�

�Stay here until someone finds us I guess.� I say for lack of a better answer.

�It'll be at least morning before anyone looks for us.� She says. �And that's only if someone actually tries to find me tonight or tomorrow before class. Oh, and since you did your best to convince Xander that we were, well even then they may not think to look for us.�

�We will get out Willow. They will come looking for us.� I tell her.

�I know, its just that if Xander thinks that we are, you know, then he may not go looking for me.�

�Pet, if he thinks I kept you at the crypt all night, the whole bloody Calvary will be looking for you in the morning.� I say trying to reassure her.

�Maybe you're right.� She says finally.
///////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

I can't believe the door won't open. Spike is so sure someone will look for us by morning. I hope he's right. This room is so small, I can't get to a position that feels comfortable. I move try to move again, this time Spike grabs my hips and holds me against him.

�I was thinking Pet, since you're so sure your friends already think we're shagging why don't we�� He says softly into my ear, as I feel his hips move against me.

�No room.� I say as he moves his tongue in my ear, his hips still thrusting between my legs.

�Plenty of room for some things.� He says and lowers onto mine.

He moves his lips over mine, teasing them, gently biting them until I open them to let his tongue in. I feel his tongue moving inside my mouth, tasting me. His hands moved from my hips, they're pulling at the hem of my t-shirt, tugging it up over my head. I raise my arms to allow him to remove my shirt. He's reaching behind me for the clasp of my bra. He undoes the clasp quickly pulling it off my shoulders letting it fall to the ground. I feel his hands on my breasts caressing them and tugging on the nipples. I feel my nipples hardening under his touch. His kisses are moving from my lips to my face, moving lower to my neck, I feel his teeth gently bite at my neck before he bends his head further to my breasts. I moan and reach for his head to pull it closer.
/////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

I take her nipple into my mouth, she moans and pulls my head against her breast. I bite her nipple softly feeling it harden in my mouth. I move my hand down to the waistband of her sweatpants. I run my fingers around the edge, letting them slide in just under the waistband. Her hips instinctively move toward my fingers. There isn't a lot of room in here, I stand back up keeping my hands on her hips. I move one hand inside her pants, I feel the edge of her panties. I move my hand lower over her panties down between her thighs. As soon as my fingers touch her, she thrusts her self into my hand. I can feel her arousal through her panties. I move my hand against her. I lower my head to kiss her again. Still moving my hand against her as she thrusts toward my hand. I move her panties to the side and thrust my finger inside her.

�Spike�� She moans as she pulls her head away from the kiss.

�Yes, Pet?� I ask still moving my hand.

�I'm going to�� She says �Oh god, Spike.�

She grabs my shoulders as I thrust a second finger into her. I feel her muscles tightening on my fingers as she comes. I keep moving my hand until she stops moving, then I move my fingers from her and hold her until her breathing starts to return to normal.

�I told you there was enough room.� I whisper in her ear.

�Uh huh. But you didn't�� She says quietly against my shoulder.

�Who said we were done?� I ask before lowering my head to kiss her again.
/////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

I feel Spike's lips on mine again. He's kissing me hard. I open my mouth to his kiss. I'm holding onto his shoulders, trying to pull him closer to me. I can feel his erection pressing against my stomach. I want him so badly. I move my hand down across his chest. I need to touch him, to feel him, the way he touched me. I hesitate when I reach the waistband of his jeans. I feel his hand close over mine, moving it lower until I feel his erection against my palm. He holds my hand there for a moment, before he removed his own hand.

His hands are pressing against the wall on either side of my head as my hand closes over him. I hear him growl as he thrusts himself into my hand. He groans when I move my hand away, but I quickly pull down his zipper, reaching inside his jeans. I pull his cock out of his jeans and move my hand slowly along the shaft. He's thrusting himself into my hand, he's colder than Oz, and it feels weird at first.

�Oh God Willow. If you don't stop I'm going to�� He moans as I move my hand faster, squeezing him harder.

�Willow!� He shouts as I feel his seed hitting my hand.

He thrusts a couple more times into my hand, before I feel him start to soften in my hand.
/////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

We need to find a way out of here now, I think as Willow moves her hand away from me. I feel like a bloody teenager. I want her. She wants me. We are not kids. Yet here we are getting ourselves off like bleeding teenagers.

�Spike is something wrong, did I do something�� She is saying softly.

�No Luv. It's not you.� I start to tell her.

She is leaning against my chest again. I start to lower my head to kiss her when I hear a noise outside. I motion for her to remain quiet. Something is near the door. I push her behind me, just as the door opens. A man is standing there.

�I thought I heard a noise in here.� The man said looking at me questioningly.

Then the man spotted Willow behind me. Looking from me to her a couple times before he spoke again.

�You were stuck right?� The man said smiling.

�Yes. Thank you.� I say, the man doesn't move he's trying to see around me to Willow. �I said thank you.� I growl at him letting my game face show.

The man turns and runs away. I turn to Willow who is already gathering her clothes.

�Do you want to go home?� I ask her.

�No. But I have class tomorrow and the crypt isn't exactly equipped for me to get ready in the morning.� She says pulling her t-shirt over her head.

�I could come home with you.� I suggest moving closer to her.

�Won't work. No men allowed after hours.� She says kissing me.
/////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

After that man let us out Spike walked me home. We stayed outside on the porch for a long time. I didn't want him to leave, but I couldn't risk getting caught with him in my room. How would I explain that to my parents, and once he was there what if he didn't leave before daylight.

�Red its almost dawn. You need to sleep and I have to get home.� He says to me before lowering his head again to kiss me.

�Spike I have to go in.� I say pulling away from him. �We'll find a way for this to work. We will.�

�Soon.� He says as he walks away from me. �Very soon.�
____________________________________________________________________________+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Day 11

I'm moving into the mansion today. It's deserted anyway. It offers plenty of shelter during the day, and it's better than the crypt. So much of Angel's belongings are still here. Which is good really. It means I don't have to go and buy a lot of items like furniture. I told Willow to meet me here tonight. I didn't tell her that I'm moving here, I want to surprise her. This gives us someplace to meet alone. She should be here soon. We're supposed to train tonight, I told her I don't see why we can't practice here as well as the shop.
//////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

I walk into the mansion. Still not sure why Spike wanted to meet here, but whatever. I call out to him as I move into the great room. I see him coming down the steps, smiling when he sees me.

�Hi.� He says as he walks over to me.

�Hi.� I respond.

He lowers his head to kiss me.

�Care to tell me why we met here?� I ask as the kiss ends.

�Like it here?� He asks.

�I guess. Why?�

�I was thinking of living here. That way we could be together without worrying about classes and stuff. I already made arrangements to have water turned on here, and Angel's generator is still here for electricity.� He says.

�Really?� I say surprised that he thought about that much.

�Yeah.� He says before lowering his head to kiss me again.

�We need to train.� I say pulling out of his arms.

�Okay. Hand to Hand.� He says.

�Fine.� I respond.
///////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

We begin circling each other. I want her to make the first move. She does finally. She lunges for me, I duck away from her. She regains her balance and circles around me again. This time I lunge toward her, only she doesn't move quickly enough. I lose my balance and fall into her, knocking us both to the ground. She is pinned under me. I shift slightly holding myself up with my arms, trying not to place too much weight on her. My hips are resting between her thighs.

�Gotta be faster.� I say to her.

�Uh yeah, faster.� She mumbles her breathing becoming shallower.

I move my hips against her and her sigh as she stares at me. I lower my head to kiss her, she parts her lips as mine touch hers. I thrust my tongue into her mouth as I move my hips against her parted thighs.

�Training�.� I hear her say as I move my lips to her exposed neck.

�Later.� I say into her ear.
//////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

Later, we can train later. He's right, I'd much rather be doing this. He kisses me again then pulls away sitting back up on his knees. He's just looking at me, not saying anything. He reaches for me, pulling me up until I'm standing in front of him.

I stand there, as his hands move up my legs, to my stomach. His hands run over the hem of my shirt, feeling under it. I shiver when his hands touch my bare skin. Then he moves his hands back down to his sides.

�Take it off Pet.� He says to me.

When I don't move he repeats it again.

�Take your shirt off.� He says.

I reach for the bottom of my shirt pulling it over my head and dropping it to the floor. He moves forward again this time kissing my stomach. I feel his lips against my stomach, I feel his tongue tracing the edge of my pants. His hands move to my hips, holding me there. He moves his hands again this time to lower my pants down. He pulls them to my ankles and I step out of them. His lips are moving over my panties now. Kissing me through them. I feel my stomach tightening under his touch. I feel the moistness spreading between my thighs. I try to move my hips forward but he's holding them again, keeping me from moving.
///////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

I gently press the inside of her thighs until she spreads her legs a little wider. I move my hand between her legs feeling the moistness. As soon as my hand touches her, she shivers and moans reaching for my head. I move my head against her, letting my tongue reach out and touch her.

�Spike�� She moans at my touch.

I move my head away from her long enough to lower her panties, she steps out of them. I move my head back between her legs. I let my tongue flick out against her clit. Her hips buck against me. I move my hand between her legs letting one finger move inside her. I move slowly in her, as my tongue and teeth continue to play with her clit. I let a second finger enter her and she moans even louder. I feel her muscles tightening around my fingers as I feel her coming on my hand her hips bucking against my touch. I move my fingers from her and raise them to my lips watching her as I licked her off of me.
//////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

He stands up and kisses me again. My taste still on his lips. He holds my ass and moves his hips against me. I feel the denim rubbing my thighs. I need to feel him, to taste him. I reach for the button on his jeans as he reaches down and removes his shirt. After undoing the button, quickly undo his zipper and lower his pants. He quickly steps out of them, kicking them to the side.

I kiss his neck and chest stopping to tease his nipples with my tongue, before moving down his stomach. When I reach his hard cock I hesitate. I want to do this, but I'm not sure. Oz and I never� I reach a hand out to touch him. He moaned as he thrust into my hand. I lower my head to kiss the tip of his cock as my hand moved back toward his balls. When he feels my lips on him he thrusts forward. When his cock hit the back of my throat I started to gag slightly. He pulled himself away from me.

�Luv we don't have to�� Spike began.

�No I want to. Its just I've never��

�Never. God Pet. All right if you're sure.� He says watching me as my hand moved back to his cock.
///////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

She's never done this before. I'm not sure this is the best time, but she isn't letting go. So I just stand still, trying not to move. I close my eyes. I feel her lips kissing my cock, as her hand moves along the shaft. A groan escapes me as I try not to thrust myself into her mouth. Her mouth is moving over my cock, I feel her sucking me into her.

A loud crash from the garden makes me jump away from her.

�What the fuck?� I say.

�Ignore it.� She says reaching for me again, �It's probably just a cat or something.�

I move away reaching for my pants.

�It's the or something that concerns me in this town.� I tell her.

I pull my jeans back on and hand her the shirt and pants she had discarded earlier. Another crash from the garden, it is definitely not a cat. I throw her a stake and grab an ax and we head for the garden. Unbelievable. Vampires. Two of them.
//////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

This is never going to happen for us. That is the thought that keeps going through my head when we walk into the garden and see the vampires.

�Lets go.� Spike says and moves fully into the garden.

I follow behind him as he approaches the vampires.

�Hey. Can I help you with something?� He says to them.

�Who are you?� The first one asks.

�I know him.� The other says, �He's that one that was helping the slayer.�

�Bingo.� Spike says.

Spike growls and without seeing it I know he has his game face on now. He swings the ax at them and they both duck it.

�Look he has a girl with him.� The first one says.

�Maybe after he's gone we can turn her.� The other says looking at me.

�Not Likely.� Spike says and rushes at them.

He grabs the first one around the neck and I hear it crack. A second later he turns to dust. I see the second one moving toward me. I try to stake him but miss the heart. Damn. He grabs my arm pulling me across the garden. I scream for Spike. He turns toward me, but we are on the other side of the garden now. He starts to run after us, I can see he isn't going to make it. I need a spell.
//////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

Before I can recover from the first vampire I hear Willow screaming my name. Damn he grabbed her. They are to far away. I can't risk throwing the ax it could hit her. I start running after them. I hear her voice she's chanting something. I can't make out the words. All of a sudden the vampire freezes. Just stops moving. His hand is still clasping her arm tightly.

�Stake him Spike.� She says.

It takes a minute for me to realize what's happening.

�Spike the spell doesn't last long. Hurry.� I hear her saying.

I snap out of the daze I seem to be in and run toward her, stake in hand. I quickly plunge the stake into the heart of the frozen vampire and watch it disappear to a pile of dust at her feet.

�What the hell just happened?� I ask her.

�We were rudely interrupted.� She answers.

�That I know. I mean what happened to him?� I say pointing at the pile of dust.

�You staked him.� She says deliberately misunderstanding.

�Red.� I say warningly.

�I froze him.� She says. �Never did that spell before either. Wasn't sure it would work.�

�Good God. You risked a spell you weren't sure of. You could have been killed.� I say hugging her to me.

�But it did work. And I'm fine.� She says kissing my cheek.

�Yeah. You are. Unfortunately the night is�� I begin.

�Ruined.� She finishes. �Want to walk me home?�

I walk her home. Tomorrow we have to patrol. After that we have the next two nights off. Giles says we can all take off patrolling to go the amusement park. Not exactly my idea of fun but Willow says she really wants to go. So I agree to go one night only.
___________________________________________________________________________++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Day 12

Patrolling tonight. I still can't believe the last two nights. We are so close. Damn vampires. He did agree to go to the amusement park with me though. Okay he thinks its stupid and he's only going to humor me, but he did agree to go. I decide on jeans tonight and a sweater. It looks like it might get kind of cold. I head down stairs to wait as soon as I see the sun start to set.

I see him walking toward the door. I see a couple girls stop to look at him as he walks by. He turns and smiles at them. He knows they like what they see.
///////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

She walks onto the porch before I reach her dorm. She's watching me walk toward her. I wish patrolling wasn't part of the plan tonight. It takes so much of the night and she has class in the morning. Oh well, nothing we can do about. Have to keep Sunnydale safe. Ha, who would ever have thought I'd be thinking about keeping anyone but myself safe.

�Ready Luv?� I say as I approach the porch.

She steps down taking my hand and we head toward the park tonight. We walk in silence until we reach the park. I like that talking isn't necessary with her. I don't have to pretend to have something to say.

When we reach the park she asks about my day.

�I sleep most of the day. Remember?�

�Oh, yeah. Takes some getting used to.� She replies.

�How about your day?� I ask.

�Classes and more classes. After class I went to help Giles research the demon thing that Xander and Anya saw last night.� She says.

�Sleepin' sounding better and better isn't it?� I say smiling at her as we walk.

�Yeah.� Is all she says.
//////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

Patrolling seems pretty uneventful tonight. We make rounds through the park kind of quickly and stop for coffee before we head to the cemetery.

�You eat a lot.� I say as we sat sharing a slice of pie in the coffee shop.

�Yeah.�

�Why. I mean you don't need it right. Angel he didn't, I mean I don't think I ever saw him eat anything.� I explain.

�I don't have to. I like too. Food amuses me. I do a lot of things I don't have to do. I like doing things that amuse me.� He says.

�What else amuses you?� I ask him.

He smiles, that smirky, sexy smile he has. But he doesn't say anything. Then I feel his hand on my knee, under the table. He never stops staring at me. Keeps looking right in my eyes, he moves his hand along the inside of my thigh. I move my legs further apart. I don't think I'm even aware I'm doing it at first. I can feel his hand through my jeans, running softly in soft circles on my thighs. His hand is moving further up toward my center. I can feel my stomach tightening at what I know is coming. I feel the moistness spreading between my legs. His hand is now touching me there. Pressing slightly. He still hasn't taken his eyes away from mine. I shiver as he moves his hand stroking me through my jeans. I decide two can play this way.
///////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

I see her begin to smile slightly, she isn't releasing my eyes though as my hand moves over her. I can feel the dampness through the material of her jeans. I feel something moving along my thigh now. Oh god. She wouldn't. Oh yeah, she is. I feel her hand pressing against my cock. Feeling the length through my jeans. I harden instantly under her touch. She's squeezing slightly now. God I wouldn't have thought I could get any harder. Her smile is widening as she feels my hips move toward her touch.

�Willow.� I say.

�I'm not stopping unless you do.� She whispers.

�Oh god, Willow I'm going to�� I say.

�You stop and I will.� She says squeezing slightly harder than before.

�Fine.� I say and move my hand back to her knee. I have no intention of leaving here completely embarrassed.

�Okay then ready to go?� She asks after taking the last bite of pie.

�NO.� I say. �We are going to have to wait a minute.�

�Oh. Sorry.� She said slightly embarrassed now.

We left the coffee shop a few minutes later and quickly made our way through the cemetery before walking her back to the dorm. I kissed her goodbye and promised to meet her at the magic shop right after sunset.
___________________________________________________________________________++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Day 13

What should I wear tonight? That is what I was thinking through most of my classes today. This was going to be almost an actual date. He was picking me up, we were going to an amusement park. Right now I'm standing in front of my closet looking at my clothes. I'm just not seeing anything I like very much right now. I pull out a couple things and discard them. I decide to go fix my hair and make-up first. Maybe when I come back I'll see something I like.

While I'm standing in front of the mirror applying my lip gloss a girl from down the hall walks in.

�Hi, Willow right?� She says.

�Yeah. Hi. You're Sheila?� I say smiling at her.

�Yeah. Date tonight?� She asks after watching me for a moment.

�Yes. I just can't pick something to wear. Nothing in my closet seems right.� I tell her.

�I think we may be the same size, maybe I have something you can wear.�

�Really?� I say surprised by her offer.

�Sure. So what's this guy like?� She asks, �I'm not trying to be nosy or anything, but it'll help me to know if I have the right outfit.�

�Oh, he's handsome, and sexy and cool.� I tell her.

�Is he like a bad boy? Or is he more college guy?�

�Definitely bad boy.� I say immediately.

�Never would have pictured you with that type, but okay.� She says pulling me to her room. �I have plenty of stuff that'll work. Where are you going by the way?�

�The fair.� I say as she rummages through her closet.

After a few more minutes of her going through her clothes she pulls out something that I can't see and says it'll be perfect.
////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

The bloody fair. I agreed to go to a fair. What the hell, might as well just relax and enjoy it I guess. I see the sun setting from the window. Time to go pick her up. I must really care about her now, to agree to this.

I walk into the magic shop, it's empty. I know she said to meet her here. I call her name. The store closed an hour ago so everyone else would be gone. The door to the back room opened and she walked out.

Damn, what is she wearing? I'm sure my eyes are not seeing her clearly. No way does she own that outfit. As she moves closer, I see that she is indeed dressed that way.

�Don't you like it?� She says shyly as she approaches me.

�Like it?� I repeat. Still amazed that she wore anything that tight and that small.

�Yeah. You look kind of funny, I-I can change if you want.�

She is wearing black leather pants, tighter than I thought possible, and the smallest red shirt I've ever seen in my very long life.

�God no. You look great.� I tell her, �Just surprised. Didn't think you owned anything like that.�

�I don't.� She says her face turning red, �I borrowed it from a friend.�

I grab her arm pulling her against me. Lowering my head to kiss her. As my tongue moves into her mouth, I move my hands down over her ass, pulling her against my cock. I break the kiss, moving to kiss her eyes and cheeks, still holding her against me, as my hips thrust against hers.

�We could stay here��

�No. Spike I want to go to the fair.� She says pulling away from me.

�Lets go then.� I say and she turns the last of the lights off and locks the door as we leave.
/////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

We walked through the fair slowly. Spike didn't really want to be here and he wasn't hiding it very well.

�Spike if you want to just go home, say so okay.� I tell him.

�No, Its fine. What do you want to do first?� He answers.

�Ferris wheel?� I suggest.

�Why?� He asks.

�Its supposed to be romantic and I've never been on one.�

�Never?� He says, �What about wolf-boy, or Tara?�

�Oz and I didn't really have time for fairs, you know dealing with well, you, Angelus, and the Mayor and all the other evil things in this town, and Tara is afraid of heights.�

�Well then by all means I want to be the first to take you on one.� He says and pulls me toward the ride.
///////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

Ferris wheel. Wonderful, a giant rickety wheel taking me up in the air, my idea of big fun. I have to stop this I am the Big Bad, I cannot be afraid of a carnival ride. I buy the tickets and we take our seats on the wheel.

�Spike are you okay?� I hear ask as we go around.

�Yeah, Luv, why?�

�If you hold the bar any tighter you might bend it.� She says looking at my hands.

I loosen my grip because I am not going to admit to being afraid. All of a sudden we jerk to a stop at the top of the wheel.

�What the bloody hell?� I say.

�Relax. They're starting to let people off now.� She says and takes my hand. �It takes a few minutes before we move again.�

She leans toward me and turns my head to face her. She moves closer and kisses me softly. I let go of her hand to put my arms around her pulling her as close as you can inside these damn cars. I feel her tongue moving around my lips trying to get me to open my mouth. I do, and she moves her tongue in my mouth I can feel her tracing over my teeth. The car is moving again. I pull away from her to hold the bar again. Finally we get to the bottom and get off the ride.

�You pick this time.� She tells me.

�How about a game?� I suggest, seems much safer in my mind.

�I always wanted someone to win me a stuffed animal.� She says hugging me.

We walk over to the strong man game. A man is hollering to win a prize for the lady by ringing a bell. I pull Willow toward the game.

�I want to try that.� I say.

�Spike those games are rigged so no one can ring the bell.� She says.

I look at her for a minute then hand the man the money. She shrugged and moved away to give me room. I raise the hammer over my head and swing. I watch as it moves up the tower and rings the bell.

�Wow, you're the first person I've ever seen do that.� The man running the game says. �Pick your prize Miss.�

�Willow?� I say when she doesn't respond immediately.
/////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

It takes a minute for me to realize that they are talking to me. I've read about these games. No one is supposed to be able to do that. Then again he's not human.

�I'm sorry.� I say and move forward. �I'll take that one.�

The man hands me the giant teddy bear, and we walk away.

�What next Pet?� He says.

�Haunted House?� I suggest.

�You're kidding?� He says to me.

�No, c'mon it'll be fun.� I say and pull him toward the giant house.

Okay maybe the haunted house wasn't the best idea, I think as we leave the house. First of all with everything I've seen in this town, not really scary anymore. Second Spike had a lot of trouble behaving in there. He spent half the time in there scaring the hell out of the workers.

�I can't believe you did that.� I say laughing as we walked through the exit.

�Sorry, couldn't help it.� He says pulling me behind the building.

When we are behind the building where no one can see us, he pushes me against he wall of the haunted house and kisses me. I feel his hands moving up from my hips to the sides of my breasts. He moves his thumbs across my nipples. I feel them stiffen under his touch. I wrap my arms around his neck trying to keep him from breaking the kiss.

�Lets get out of here.� He says into my ear as he breaks the kiss.

�Uh, huh.� I say as he moves away from me taking my hand.
/////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

As soon as we walk into the mansion I pull her against me lowering my mouth to kiss her. As I kiss her I start backing us toward the bedroom. I'm moving my hands down to the bottom of her shirt, pushing under the hem to feel the bare skin. She feels so warm, against my cold touch. I feel her shiver against me when I touch her nipples through the fabric of her bra.

Inside the bedroom now, I pull my head away, hearing her groan as I move away. Her hands reach for me to pull me back. I take the hem of her shirt in my hands and pull it over her head.

�You too.� She says reaching for my shirt.

I let her pull my shirt out of my jeans and over my head. She moves against me lowering her head to place small kisses across my chest. She moves her mouth over my nipples and bites gently. I moan and pull her up against me to kiss her again. As my tongue moves inside her mouth I reach behind her to undo the clasp of her bra, pulling it over her shoulders letting it fall to the floor between us. I lower my head to her breasts, caressing one while my mouth moved over the other, sucking the nipple into my mouth.
///////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

He's moving away from me again. I groan out loud, reaching for him. Not wanting to lose his touch. He takes my hand and pulls me to the bed. I sit on the edge as he kneels down and takes my shoes off my feet. Running his hands up my legs, as he reaches the inside of my thighs, his movements slow, he moves his hands in small circles. He moves his hand up to the button of my pants and quickly undoes the button and zipper. He leans me back on the bed moving over me to kiss me again. He moves down from my lips to my breasts and across my stomach. As he moves lower his hands start to pull my pants down past my hips, kissing the skin as he exposed it. When he reached my center, he moved to pull my pants off my legs tossing them aside. He pulled my panties down and tossed them with my pants. His hands caressed the inside of my thighs again, he followed his hands with his mouth, placing kisses along my thighs, avoiding the spot where I needed him most. I finally felt his hand move against me and I thrust my hips into his touch.

He moved his hand against me for a minute before I reached for him pulling him back up to my lips. Kissing him gently.

�I want you. Now Spike.� I whispered in his ear moving my hand down to the front of his jeans squeezing him through his jeans.

He moved off me as he shed his jeans. He moved back over me, lowering his head to kiss me as he reached one hand over for my leg raising it up against his hip. He lowered himself against me. I can feel his cock pressing against me. I thrust my hips up toward him. I need to feel him inside me. He smiles at me as he pulls his hips away.

�Spike.� I moan reaching my hand down for his cock.

My hand finds what it's searching for, pulling him down and placing him inside me. He moans as he thrust his hips into me. I can feel him filling me. He stops for a minute, waiting for me to move against him. I thrust me hips toward him again, and he begins pumping into me.

�Willow.� He moans as I feel him moving inside me.

He reaches down between us and I feel his fingers on my clit, moving over it, pinching it slightly. I feel my stomach tightening.

�Spike, I'm�� I say pulling his head down to mine.

�As my muscles contract around him, he thrusts one last time deep into me and I feel his seed filling me. He pumps into me a few more times then he rolls over pulling me on top of him. I feel him softening inside me. He kisses me, holding me against him.

�Stay tonight.� He says.

�Yeah.� I say.
___________________________________________________________________________++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Day 14

I feel hands on me, moving down my chest, across my stomach, moving lower. I feel it circle my cock. The hand is moving along the shaft, my cock is hardening quickly under the touch. I open my eyes when I feel her lips touch my nipple. She raises her head and smiles at me. She moves lower. I watch her as she slides down my body. I feel her tongue touch my cock. Her mouth is moving over it, sucking me into her mouth. My hips thrust up involuntarily forcing my cock into her mouth. I feel it hitting the back of her throat, before she pulls her head back.

�Oh God Willow.� I moan.

I reach for her head, holding her still as I thrust myself into her mouth. I pump into her mouth faster as I feel myself ready to come. With one final thrust my seed hits the back of her throat. I pull her up to me, kissing her deeply. I roll us over so she is lying flat on the bed. I move down her body kissing her breasts, and stomach as I moved between her thighs.
////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

He's kissing my stomach, god he's moving lower. I feel his hands pushing my thighs apart. I feel his lips on my clit, sucking it into his mouth, his hand is caressing my thigh, moving between my legs, his fingers pressing into me. He's thrusting his finger inside, I feel him moving inside me. His teeth are biting at my clit now.

�Spike, I can't��

He thrust another finger into me. He's sucking harder on my clit, I feel his fingers pulling out of me. I moan, reaching for him. He's moving his head lower, I feel his tongue moving inside me.

�Spike.� I say grabbing his head.

I feel my self coming, my muscles tightening, I yell as my body shakes from the orgasm. Spikes moving back up my body kissing my stomach as he moves. He moves up to my mouth kissing me as I feel his cock push inside me.
///////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

I thrust my cock inside her, moving in her. She raises her legs wrapping them around me, pulling me closer to her. I thrust harder, I feel my balls hitting her as I move. She pulls my mouth to hers, thrusting her tongue into my mouth. I feel her nails in my back. I move my lips against her neck. Kissing her, running my tongue over her pulse. I nip at her gently.

�Spike.� She yells as I feel her coming again.

I thrust into her harder, and faster. I feel my self coming again as her muscles contract around my cock pulling me deeper into her. I kiss her rolling us over so she is on top of me. She's sitting on top of me now. I put my hands on her hips as she begins to move on top of me. I run my hands up her sides to her breasts, caressing them gently. Running my fingers over her nipples, worry them with my fingers.
/////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

I move on top of him, slowly at first. Then faster when his fingers touch my nipples. God I want this to last forever. His hands are moving back to my hips now, as he starts thrusting his hips up to me. I slow my movements, smiling at him as I move. He moans and tries to thrust faster into me.

�Willow, I can't wait anymore.� He says rolling us over again.

He's thrusting into me now. Faster, harder, than before, move with him. I feel my orgasm coming again.

�Spike.� I say as he thrust into me one last time as my muscles contract around him and I can feel his seed inside me.

He lowers his head kissing me again as he stops moving inside me.

�Thank you.� He says quietly.

�For what?� I ask.

�Best wake up I've had in a long time Luv.� He says kissing me again.

He moves off of me. Kissing me gently. I try to pull him back on top of me.

�Too heavy Pet.� He says, �Do you have class today?�

�Nope, I can stay all day.� I say smiling at him.

The end.

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