High School Mage: The College Years Quotes
"You know that she's from Aminus, Oregon."
"The one with the space needle?"
"...And as for you, your roommate's name is Al-Ashwad."
"Okay! First of all it is just wrong to have your father's charred penis in a box in your dorm room!"
"Sorry we were late. My mom had to stop at a rest area and jerk off a butterfly."
"I'm drunk, and I have a neutron accelerator."
"Can't your friend Frankie speak for himself?"
"No, he's...unique."
"The Holy Ghost is the reason I'm an atheist."
"There's ghosts, and we have to catch them."
"Yeah, I get it. It's like Pokemon."
"No, it's not like Pokemon! You don't let them go!"
"They understood it in that not understanding sort of way."
"It's like makeup for your armpits!"
"Thank you, Miss Gastropod!"
"You should borrow my tongue."
"The lesson we learned here is that you shouldn't stand next to the donkey's ass if you don't want your boobs touched."
"I need to talk to some Japanese people."
"Baka baka baka baka!"
"So you're making chicken noises?"
"No, baka means idiot."
"I know that baka means idiot. I'm just saying, you're making chicken noises."
"I'll let you play with my machine for awhile."
"Your machine?"
"If you want some juice."
"You'll let me play with your machine for awhile for some juice?"
"Yeah, it's in my closet. What were you thinking?"
"Find the Nazi!"
"So you like to harass all of the innocent girls that live in this dorm?"
"Everyone needs a hobby."
"It's a compound that uses a little bit of baking soda along with other basical kitchen appliances..."
"What kind of message are you trying to send him by putting a banana peel
under his sheets?"
"That, like this banana peel, all of his girlfriends are rotten in bed."
"Don't tempt my cream soda demon!"
"How many Void Engineers does it take to screw in a light bulb? Depends on how much Dimensional Science they have..."
"We both have caves."
"Yeah, but my cave is littler than your cave."
"You skipped a foam party to go get high?"
"No, the two are in no way related."
"I smoked the illegal drugs much long after the party."
"It slimed me first, dude! The little girl!"
"...TMI!"
"It's almost like Frankie was a part of the conversation for awhile there."
"From now on, every time I think of President Thomforde, I'll picture Iain jerking off a tree trunk."
"Stop making my ass talk."
"She starts spazzing off and runs out into the woods."
"I start metaphorically poking at his neck."
[Iain begins making pelvic thrusts.]
"I have a two Charisma, and I'm attracted to my brother."
"What wha...what was with what what what wha-happened?"
"I dumped her. She won't be a problem again."
"It's a rough estimate that it has under 900 ghosts."
"How many can it hold?"
"...It's a containment unit."
[Tenner, on ghosts.]
"They're negative creatures. They're angry. They're dead."
"My roommate is a sex god, and I feel infertile."
"Don't make me horny. You wouldn't like me when I'm horny."
"It's...SpongeBob GabrielPants!"
"You see a wolf that's eight feet long..."
"Omigod!"
"And one foot high?"
"It's a weasel?"
"It's a wolfeasel!"
"Mom, could you please give me an extra vagina so that I can have more sex?"
"Where would YOU put an extra vagina?"
"They look exactly the same, and they're made of ghost."
"In Aminus. Mwah-MWAH-ma-na-na..."
"Their room smells like rotting bananas and skank."
"And for some reason, both smells come from the same place."
"New game plan, guys. We're going back to the dorm."
"You know, we should get drunk and kiss each other."
"It's the opposite of hungry. It's urping it out."
"The opposite of hunger is vomiting, now?"
"Urping? Is that a technical term?"
"I knew there was a reason I'd decided not to drink while GMing, and this session is it."
"Iain took six shots of R&R during UA last night."
"You did? I didn't know that!"
"I guess you couldn't really tell the difference, huh?"
"We don't want Alex's bed. It's unholy."
"I don't know what I was thinking just now. Something about breast implants."
"In that case, you're walking like you have a full diaper."
"It's time to change the ghostbuster!"
"Wait! You guys!"
"One of us is a spy!"
"His two favorite things in life are D&D and pooing."
"That's just not right, the way that breast folds."
"It's a little bit of squirrel-on-squirrel action."
"Can I buy the Medicine skill so that I can help Frankie?"
"No. Drunk people get to do this."
"We feel ourselves getting large and cavernous?"
"My cavernity is huge."
"Sometimes I play a Hermetic in my other game that I run, and when I play
him, I feel like I make up a lot of words."
"You mean you have a Hermetic NPC in that other game that all of us are
in?"
"Yes. I play a Hermetic sometimes. And I make up a lot of words. I think."
"Do you think that shlong would be a better dynamic or entropic resonance trait?"
"Shlongical...shlongish..."
"Does the cavern enjoy our presence as we penetrate its hole?"
"Guys? How do you spell the word 'does?'"
"Incidentally, I continue the penetration as well."
"He's up against me and I'm up against him and I'm going to try to make the stake go in further."
[As a vampire is literally chewing on her neck.]
"Um, guys? If this goes horribly wrong could one of you please tell my
mom about it?"
"How many successes, Iain?"
"77."
"No, really. How many successes?"
"I told you. 77."
"Iain..."
"Wait, where are my dice? Actually I think I just failed."
"Yes, you did."
"You pulled his tooth out?"
"You put a stake through his heart!"
"Oh, let's just play the blame game now!"
"One day, you'll wake up and there will be bananas in places that bananas
should not be."
"Life 1, Bananas 2."
"Iain, bananas aren't a sphere."
"Bananas are the tenth sphere."
The Characters and Players:
Tenner Chadwick, Etherite boy genius who believes that the Ghostbusters
are real. Played by Iain.
Frankie Chesterfield, mute Etherite DJ and defector from the Celestial
Chorus. Played by Andy.
Leia G Chial, Etherite daughter of Kenley Chial and Joe Mau and the queen
of all the geeks. Played by Rachel.
Anaka Lindley-Myles, overachieving Progenitor daughter of Emily Nicole
Lindley and Adrian Myles. Played by Nikki.
Storyteller: Beth.