P o e t r y
___üÑtÎtLéÐ_mϧçÊllÅñÈøܧ_§hÏt___
i'm dying in doses
scrying black & blue roses
i don't practice laws
i defy them
i've died
inside
my silent
cyanide
asylum
i'm mortified
i'm morbidified
(yes i'm aware that's not a real word)
ima completely differunt class
i'm tongue-tied and crucified
choking on shards of glass
i'm ur disappointment
i'm ur perpetual delusion
i'm bleeding inside u
i'm ur contusion
i've taken enough pills to kill a horse
i've fucked fags and whores
i've conversed with the voice in my head trip
i deserve the noise of a dead sleep
i'm nice & easy & cheap
HOMOcidal secrets, i can't keep
doing this to myself
i hafta get my fix
i gotsta help my health
or i'm liable to schiz
I WANNA KILL THE GREEDY RICH
and feed them to the poor
i wanna steal your every stitch
cause i'm a hungry like a whore
i swear i don't mean to
your blood's just thicker
i'm dying proof
that sluts just heal quicker
~Sophia~(Golden Girls)
i'd kill myself to heal u
i'd die just to see the real u
the "faith" is decaying
and even jeezuz krist is praying
i'm dismal
i'm dead
and i'm abysmal
but misled
i wanna be the grrl with the most cake
~hole~
i want the world
~Julie Dawn Cole~she played Veruca Salt in Willy Wonka
i want it all for my sake
i'm a material "grrl"
~madonna~
is anybody out there anything at all
if i rip you will you tear
crumble the pieces, let them fall
stomp them in the ground, stand on them and turn
your mission's hellbound, i hope you're happy while you burn
and i hope to watch you suffer, half as much as i
with luck you won't recover
and with luck you'll slowly die
get me away from you, i'm going to be ill
on the verge to do, i feel the urge to kill
get me away from you, you haven't got a use
you're starting to turn blue, your neck's caught in a noose
get me away from you, but i wanna watch you try
to fight for your life, and then to watch you die
i can't do anything right
"god" & i would make the perfect pair
neither one of us have accomplished shite
i'm existing in my reign of error
i'm subsisting
as an abstract
i'm living
out of a backpack
___§çHìZøÏd___
i've got brain lesions
that won't go away
i'm trippin' on seizures
and i need to rolla jay...
me, stop urself
with viagara and mad cow disease
GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME
No!...Stay!...Please!
Who? Why? Where? When?
What the fuck were we just talking about?
i said do u wanna "go there" again?
or is mister str8 n' narrow having doubts?
I DON'T LIKE UR ATTITUDE
and i can't stand ur face
WHERE THE FUCK AM I?
get me outta this place
i think someone's here
WHO TURNED OUT THE LIGHTS
everything's a blur
OHHH! JEEZUZ FUCKING KRIST
(followed by a horrific bloodcurdling scream)
___BåLLí§tÌç___
i'm conversing with myself
and i'm making disturbing expressions
i'm rehearsing what i sell
but i'm not faking my impressions
my blood's coursing thick
through the veins of my disdain
my head's growing sick
with the pains of my own remains
i'd try to look up
but i'd fall flat on my face
i'd die to hookitup
but ima god-damn-disgusting-disgrace
i'll dose myself comatose
and asphyxiate my ills
i'll know death close
with dialated eyes and chills
___WåÑÑãBë___
i wanna be a rock star
i wanna be a poet
i wanna be a philosopher
but i know i'm gonna blow it
i wanna be an artist
i wanna be a slut
i wanna be an "actress"
but i'm stuck in a rut
i wanna be an architect
and i wanna play with computers
i wanna be assertive & direct
i wanna shoot the polluters
i wanna help the homeless
i wanna own a bar
i wanna move way out west
i wanna be a porn star
i wanna be athletic
and i wanna be a volunteer bleeder
i wanna be anorexic
and i wanna be a renown cult leader
i wanna be a counselor of course
and i wanna be a psychic healer
i wanna be a "god" of sorts
i wanna be a psychotic killer
___§hÏñ¥_"hÅpp¥"_PéØpLê___
why can't i have the few things i want
why can't i just be "happy" or something for once
and why do you smile everytime i'm in pain
why do you see me as loathsome & shamed
when do things start looking up
when does it all just end
where do i go when i've had enough
or shall i just pretend
EVERYTHING IS PERFEKT
PEACHY FUCKIN' KEEN
i'm discerning the darkness
and fucking myself
as a desperate depressed drug fiend
___§tÎtçHëÐ_&_§tÃïÑèÐ_RåGdØll___
i'm brittle & torn
and my seams r letting loose
i've been walked on & worn
neglected & abused
i'm hazy not narrow
sometimes shady & shallow
always crazy & unbearable
unfortunately hideous & hysterical
a pure poor-bred slut at heart
uneased & on my knees till i internally depart
___åÑäTøMíÇãLLÿ_ÍñÇöRRêçT___
people tell me i should seek help
talk to the rapist and just see
discover myself and redevelop
but neither one of me agree
we think we're just fine
and would be better if you'd BUTT THE HELL OUT
i don't bitch, i don't whine
nor do i pathetically pout
i admit some want attention
but i could care less about you, or me, or me
we don't display our affections
i express myself literarily
___PâLë_§hÄdÈ_ºf_BlÜê___
i have something to say to u
but i wouldn't know what to say
nuthin' i feel, feels true
but i think about u every GOD DAMN day
i've got something to say to u
but i wouldn't know where to begin
why do u make lusting after u
feel like a forbidden sin
i need something a pale shade of blue
so i don't lose my shit
no one notices it but UR STARING AT ME
and i can't fuckin' take it
___[RëVèRêÑd_JíM_jØñ˧]_ëLèÇtRíÇ_KøøL_åÍd_h¥dRøÇÿÅñÌç_ÃçÏd_t˧t___
attention all u "sinners"
u drug addicted whores
it's time to sip a double-dip trip
and unlock the hidden doors
we'll hide beneath the floor boards
in our carcass infected tombs
we'll greet death with broken arms
and deny what it consumes
we'll rot among the earthworms
and although we won't know it
we'll exist on a whole differunt level
we'll be above yet still below it
___ÚñRëLèÑtÎñG_vØíÇé§___
several years back
i exorcised my soul as a witch
and ever since that
i've been a royal heinous bitch
i can't fucking tolerate the "mentally impaired"
this place is over populated with the wrong kinda people
i'm gonna freak out and make u scared
start gunnin' u down from atop a church steeple
i'll exterminate the rednex
get the christians and aminites too
(aminites = amish/mennonite cult-ure)
i'll make jews wear dreadlocks
and then i'll kill u
___pÜt_Úr§èLf_Ïñ§íÐê_mÈ___
u look yummy enough to lick
rub u up and down
sure would like to ride dat dick
rape me inside out
wanna orally caress ur inner-thighs
i wanna be morally degraded
mentally molest my inner-child
force fuck me full of hatred
turn me into ur human latrine
do me with inhuman behavior
eat me like Ed Gein
no artificial flavors
___m¥_§Tr¥Kñ¥ñë_VåLêÑt¥ñË___
§ømething cøld
§ømething blue
§ømething §ørrøwed
Ï vøw tø ÿøu
u r my moonshine
my strychnine moonshine
u entrap me
when life is grey
u'll never know my fears
or see my acidic tears
so please don't take
my moonshine away
the other evening as i lie sleeping
i drempt of sparkling cyanide
when i came to i had misplaced u
so i hung myself and died
___Pø'___
i'm quite literally
the epitome
of poor white trailor trash
and i'm living a lie
to save my life
snorting snow white's stash
___m¥_p§¥køTïK_ÂmBÏãÑçÊ___
i want to evolve overnight
i want to get away from this life
i'm better than this, i deserve more
i'm a catatonic catastrophic pillhead junkie whore
___rÜråL_ÐêÇã¥___
i've been passed through the bowels
of rural decay
through poverty, molestation
and not eating for days
no phone or heat
in our rat infested trailor
complete with duct tape mended windows
and no clean clothes to wear
a too long leaking roof
caused the sea-foam molded ceiling
and the mushrooms in the carpeting
also, the kitchen linoleum is peeling
a frigidaire full of rotting food
and a dryer that doesn't dry
"trash" sitting everywhere
this is my stagnant sty
___mÏñÐ_rÅÞé___
i'm so fuckin sick
of hearing what's wrong
perhaps it was a memory,
a thought, or a song
but, why the fuck should you care?
this isn't your plot.
i'm trapped inside my hemorrhaging heart
and you've become a clot
you're contaminating me
i'm contaminating...me!
you can't see my moon
you can't see my stars
you can't see my blacklight sensitive suicide scars
all you see is yourself
and all the "good" you've done
you're mind-raping me
and i fear you're having fun
___m¥_ïÑêXtRíKãBLë_ÈmØsHüÑz___
i'm still crying
though you can't see my tears
i'm still hiding
trying not to show my fears
i'm still lonely
and i know you don't care
but i can't live life
alone, in hopeless despair
you'll never see
or comprehend in the least
why it is or what it is
that makes me diseased
i'm like rotting gangrenous flesh
i wish i'd decay quicker
my intellect is fresh
but my mind is getting sicker
i'm not like you
or anyone for that matter
i'm living in solitude
and i can't get any sadder
i'm unconscious during daylight
then i wake up and cry
take a trip, go skiing
hit a rock and get high
___åLL_ÃmÊrÌçÅñ_dÓØrMãT___
i unfortunately realize
i dwell in my sorrow
i've been doing it for years
and i'll do it tomorrow
but i can't possibly hate myself
anymore than i do now
i wish i could want to live
i wish someone would show me how
oh! but then i'd be tacky
all emotional and shit!
i'd dream about my soul-mate
in which i'd never get
i'd much rather know the truth
than lies and deception
i'm not uncouth
don't misperceive my extrasensory perception
___d˧øLÅtÊ___
i am all alone
i have no friends
no one cares for me
gotta get a gun
get a gun and shoot
right between my eyes
blood run numb onto my boots
and hope that someone cries
cares at least a little
perhaps recalls my name
the faucet's relentlessly dripping
perhaps it'll take the blame
smoke myself comatose
and make you hear my scars
the time is close sweet comatose
you've stolen all my stars
you've killed all my hopes and dreams
and now you're killing me
nothing is as it truely seems
why can't you just see
but i understand
and you'll find out soon
you'll be as desolate as i
without your silver fucking spoon.
(i hope u fuckin choke on it)
___LìThïÜm_BåRbÏêDøLL___
i can't sleep
i can't stay awake
i'm in too deep
i'm gonna break
i'm gonna get...
i'm gonna get clean
just one more fuckin' hit
or i'll go in-fuckin'-sane
i need an 8ball
and a glass stem that won't break
i need a line or three or four
and a bottle of chloral hydrate
i need a 5th of rum
to wash it all down
i need some lithium
to take away my frown
i need paxil & prozac
so i talk in my sleep
i need effexor & zoloft
and amitriptylene
i need vicodin & codeine
to take away my pain
i need to snort some methylphenidate
to keep my ass awake
i need darvocet & percocet
where should i begin
i need valium, somas, & oxycontins
cause i don't do heroin
even if it's good or bad
or it totally fucks my head (twitch)
it's better than constantly being sad
and it'll better when i'm dead
___§üÎçÏdÅl_§kÅñK___
you're all locked up
and you're never coming out
you can try all you want
you can bitch and scream and shout
you've been locked up for all these years
face it stupid bitch
nobody cares about your tears
your mom says that you
and all your friends are queers
you begin to tremble
as the end nears
you've dealt with this before
but never quite the same
they'll think again, when you're lying on the floor
and they're the ones to blame
you aggresively take the razor blade
and slash across your wrist
you got blood on the walls and floor
you're mother's going to be pissed
you light up a cigarette
and try not to think about the pain
you haven't passed out yet
you must have missed the proper vein
you pick up the razor blade
and take another try
the price must be paid
now you begin to cry
you cut it twice as deep
blood shoots onto the vanity
your skin begins to creep
as you start to lose your sanity
you give yourself unto others
like a dead carcass to a maggot
people say you're a confued teen
and your boyfriend, he's a faggot
but who are they to judge
they're no better than I
you think to yourself
i hope that i soon die
___gËñÈtÎç_mÜtÅtÌøÑ_§hÏm___
i can't be what i should
i'm a grrl inside a guy
i'd be normal if i could
but i'll forget about it if i get high
i have to get my hair cut short
and i can't bleach or dye
i can't wear my daisy duke's
i can't leech onto guys
i have to take out my nose ring
and i can't be so god damn flamboyant
when ABBA comes on i can't dance & sing
cuz acting queer is an annoyance
i can't wear fingernail polish
and i can't wear those clothes
i can't fucking frolic
with the rest of the homos
___RêÅLíTÿ_ÇhËçk___
the widow weeps
and the raven cries
sympathy sleeps
as everyone dies
by the plague of woe
my heart it stole
and left sorrow
to partake of my soul
It left vile betrayal
and panic oppression
but I fortunately resulted
in manic depression
like a sixth sense
i see what others don't see
be it may or be it not
your all just shit to me
others don't embrace
there are few things people care about
getting fame, getting face
getting more, and getting out
getting paid, getting laid
and getting high to get by
my views are deplorable
my thoughts pessimistic
but the way i see
i'm just being realistic
___§hÅllØw___
forget tomorrow
it's not going to come
the sun's burning out
it's frozen
it's numb
call me tomorrow
and see if we're here
and if u don't bother
i guess i don't care
i'll get by
by myself
with no one to talk to
or i'll kill myself
with no one to blame but u
shove a scalpel in my wrist
and give it a twist
no need to worry
i won't even be missed
fuck friends and family
they don't give a shit
i guess i should be used to it
that's all i ever get
i've grown immune to emotion
i'm not fond of feeling
i like chaotic commotion
i find it to be quite healing
so fuck the ending
i don't wanna wait
i have nothing left to love
i have nothing left but hate
___mØrBiÐ_MëLåÑçHøLÿ_mÅdÑꧧ___
the melancholy madness
that's in my head
all the nasty shit
i think, i wish i'd never said
the thoughts and voices
that won't go away
staying up all night
and sleeping all day
mindlessly analyzing perspectives of life
one quick way to solve it
go get a knife
with no one to help me
but insanity itself
with no apparent value
and certainly no wealth
absolutely useless
and slightly psychotic
necrophilia sounds oddly erotic
full of hatred
and morbid fantasies
but very polite
and always on my knees
i'm looking for my soul-mate,
but he's no where in sight
if you see him let me know,
he's a black hitlerite
he wants to rule the world
as well as do i
and if ur a chistian
i'll make sure that u die
somewhat witty
but not mentally stable...much
a cauldron full of boiling babies
as an added touch
heat and stir
and see what you've got
a poor mortal body
that'll deteriorate and rot!
___Ðí§øRdÊrLÿ_MëÑtÿL___
ode to the depressed
of a society obsessed
with escaping from reality
trying to avoid normality
but don't be mislead
for i like to fuck the dead
and smoke a little bud
while slowly sipping blood
from the veins of the feet
of a corpse i'll later eat
and from the fiery pits of hell
i'll cast a little spell
on the assholes that I hate
predestined is their fate
in which they'll never seek
for calling me a freak
and hating me 'cause i'm queer
i guess it simply wasn't clear
I can't help the way i turned out
and beyond the shadow of a doubt
for curiosity's sake
i'd like to sleep and just not wake
___ñËûRøTíK_ñÈüRõ§î§_\|/_p§ÿKøTïK_p§ÿkø§í§___
i need therapy like aroma, i'd be better off in a coma
drown my life with sorrow, cause i know things'll be worse tomorrow
never look up, always look down, never smile, always frown
live for the end, and not today, there isn't a will, there isn't a way
please don't mind me if i'm freaking, like a retard my sanity's leaking
it's behind me now it's gone to my grave,
yet i stick around, i crave to rave
to speak in a frenzy...incoherently,
i misbehaved i can't be saved apparently
and i can't stand the sound of churchbells ringing,
at 7 in the morning the choir's singing...
hillbilly prayers and redneck fever,
i'd like to hack 'em all up with a meat cleaver,
or send em to a camp and suffocate with gas,
then throw them in the oven, and incinerate their ass.
___§øÜl_4_§ãLé___
in the middle of a suicidal session, like an orchestra of depression
full of hate-fuck aggression, and a dark side obsession
lack of concentration, on a full out invocation
leads to death's invitation, choke on smoke inhalation
never underestimate intellect, or it's inevitable effect
to compensate for a defect, caused by long-term child neglect
despite your qualmful notion, dug too deep into emotion
thriving on eccentric devotion, to brewing up your potion
used to maim and kill, my spirit and my will
from the sado-masochistic, to the enchantment of the mystic
and til the sand in the glass is done, I hope you've finally won
sorry, you broke the rule, now it's time to sell your soul.
___KåöTík_ÄñtìKrîst_ÂñårKïst___
save the witch and burn the queen
she's too rich, behead her in guillotine
fuck political punk, fuck political junk
fuck the government and fuck their laws
lets enact the anarchy clause
if i had the chance, i would dictate the world
and make all the men my bitches
if i had my way, they wouldn't wear pants
and christians would be the first to become witches
If they refuse or fail to try
sorry grandma, it's your time to die
(my grandma's a protestant preacher)
people would learn to like me and except that i'm boss
or suffer the consequences and be staked to a cross
obesity and poverty would be considered a sin
for you can never be too rich or too thin
portraits of terrorists would widely be muraled
but we'd all be just as equal in my little world.
___üÑtÎtLéÐ___
needless gestures of an inhumane society, nowhere near sobriety
swingin in a cot, i'd sooner see you rot
like a festering dead carp, or stepping on a sharp
rigid piece of glass, fuck me up the...
chimney's on fire, and burning with desire
a meaningless act of lust, an absolute must
when searching for excitement, while reading this enditment
and to watch you slowly suffocate, is enough to make me masterbate
your aura spreads itself like a fatal disease,
it's foul wicked stench hears not my pleas,
pardon me if i've been a bit graphic,
but do us both a favor and go play in traffic
___VåLLë¥_ºF_WøË___
[gotta run, gotta hide
so no one sees what's inside]
"mourn behind the dumpster
it's a personality match,
cry me a fucking river dumbass
you fit in with all that trash!"
[gotta run, gotta get away
cause nobody hears what i've got to say]
"go see a therapist
he can ease your pain,
make it easy on yourself
go open a vein"
[gotta run, gotta lay low
i've got nothing to lose and nothing to show]
"you're such a loser,
you make me sick,
you've got nothing to work with
you aren't gonna amount to dick."
[gotta run, gotta go
into the shadows, of the valley of woe
___üÑtÎtLéÐ___
i unintentionally give off the wrong impression
with everything i say
like talking to a wall of depression
i feel like dying every day
it seems like i'll never get through
when everything's my fault
just like you
i'm a member of the cult
knowing not what to believe
nor do i fucking care
with nothing left to do but grieve
to trust i do not dare
never trust a single soul
cause they'll fuck you in the end
it may sound cruel but i don't care
...just don't trust your friends
most get off on this fucked up fad
making up for areas in which they lack
personally, i get-off on being sad
through my eyes, everything's black
black is life and oh so dull
always boring, i feel like crying
my favorite season being fall
cause everything's suffering and slowly dying
which is all we're doing so what's the point
it's a cruel joke or maybe a curse
make it go away, light up a joint
though it probably will, it can't get any worse
___LùV_²_hÅtË___
you can't hate others
until you learn to hate yourself
we're already living in hell
heaven would be drugs, sex, and wealth.
jeezuz was a schizophrenic crack fiend
we could hook up and break bread
we could look up mary magdeline
i heard the slut gave good head
and virgin mary, quite to the contrary
got knocked up by a sheep-herder
that's who popped her cherry
i detest everyone, i love to hate
you don't exist to me, you don't even rate
i like being nasty, i love being blunt
so go to hell asshole
and piss off you cunt
it's time to quit
but of this i'm quite sure
although it may not seem it
i hate myself a lot more
i just wasn't blessed
it wasn't my fate
i guess i'm obsessed
i love to hate
___üÑtÎtLéÐ___
stab a rat through the skull with a dirty fork
eat a maggot or two while you listen to Bjork
drive a screwdriver through ur boyfreinds eye
beat your wife and children just to watch em cry
lick a plank of razor blades and slowly suck the blood
eat a piece of moldy bread as u fall face first into the mud
stand up now and clean urself off
you've got to get ur physical so turn ur head and cough
they've discovered u have an incurable disease
and that ur going to die
u figure it's time to give up
there's no point to even try
___§tÅrVïÑg_§ºLíTüÐê___
fortune fails but in fairy tales
everyone lives happily ever after
in my twisted tale, everything's stale
and mad screams are heard louder than laughter
once upon a time, there was a nasty old witch
who boiled little children, just to watch em twitch
she used flesh as parchment
and fat for oil
she'd eat the meat, drink the blood
and put the bones in soil
she watered the spot with the blood of seven crows
and nine days later a demon arose
it had horrific features
and walked with a limp
it was an ugly creature
but she loved that little impe
she taught it to kill
and eat children too
it was especially fond of
fresh four-year-old stew
but it was evil at heart
and it grew to hate her
and then one day
it just up and ate her
it grew terribly lonely
and no longer had food
the poor creature died
of starving solitude
___§åÐø-mÄsØkRí§tMü§_w/Bill_&_Monica___
'twas the night before christmas
and all through the white house
monica was moaning
with bill's hand up her blouse
he said with a hush
as he fondled her tit
"if you wake up hillary,
i'll bite off your clit!"
she couldn't help herself
she began to moan more
he lightly whispered
"be quiet you whore!"
then all of a sudden
came a thunderous knock
it was santa and mrs. clause
saying "bitch, suck his cock!"
she dropped to her knees
and started to suck
but then got the hiccups
and said "bill, let's just fuck."
he was just about to cum
so the news made him pissed
then santa yelled to him,
"bill tie up her wrists!"
he tied her up
and her panties he ripped
then mrs. clause asked,
"do you wanna be whipped?"
she through to him
a whip eight feet long.
he said "santa come here,
lets first smoke a bong."
they toked and choked
and got totally stoned
then monica shouted,
"i wanna be boned!"
bill slowly stood up
and then got knocked down
for mrs. clause was above him
in her silk evening gown.
first, she cuffed him
then rode his shaft
while santa whipped monica
he joyfully laughed
he stuck into her,
a dildo of glass
and then he fucked her
right up the ass
together they came
after fucking for a while
and later admitted
they liked sado-style.
*Melankolly's Cyanide Asylum*
~melankolly~
~*Mélåñkøllÿ's Çýåñídê Åsÿlûm*~