Honda: That's right, and welcome back to another glorious Vermonster Fight Night; where the contestants are tough...
Chang:...and the ice cream's even tougher.
Honda: Tonight we bring you a relatively low-key match. An 0-1 rookie is taking a team of Vermonster greenhorns against a low level Vermonster.
Chang:While they may be rookies, profesionsal Vermonster Slayers are always ready to welcome new recruits into this lucrative, delicious, yet dangerous field of work. I myself am a Level 7 Vermonster Slayer.
Honda: Impressive.
Chang: Such a level requires the utmost dedication. I slay anywhere from 8 to 11 Vermonsters daily just to stay in practice. Thus despite carrying this two ton wrecking ball with me everywhere I go, I still weigh 637 lbs.
Honda: Shouldn't we be using the metric system?
Chang: Shut up.
Honda: Ha ha, you crazy SNK bastard. Tonight's slayers are three youths from the United States. The young Saker Alexander, who has appeared here before...
Chang: IN BITTER FAILURE!
Honda: But now returns tonight with a new team behind him. And the slayers' rosters are...
Chang: It is interesting to note that this new group is even smaller than the last one he brought against a Vermonster.
Honda: Well here's wishing them the best of luck.
Chang: Not a moment too soon either. Here comes the beast now.
Honda: Christ! Look at the evil radiating off of that thing.
Chang: Yes indeed. It takes a special kind of person to take these things head on.
Honda: And here come the slayers now. The standard pre-fight greeting.
Chang: Perhaps the only friendly part of this confrontation. Vermonsters fight for their lives like Satan himself.
Chang: And there they go! This battle is underway.
Honda: I have here now, the official stats on tonight's creature. As stated before, a rather weak entry. It's fully topped, but only three different flavors.
Chang: Hmmm. It may have all it's toppings, but that defense pales in comparison with the flavor count, which increases its defenses exponentially.
Honda: Indeed. Vermonster f-counts are capable of reaching as high as twenty different flavors. Truly a fascinating creature.
Chang: Yes, but thankfully those twenty counts are quite rare. I've gone solo with as high as a 16 count, and let me tell you. Once those flavors start blending... you start tasting flavors... terrible flavors...
Honda: You mean like elephant?
Chang: No I don't mean like elephant. Far worse than elephant, which is actually pretty good.
Honda: Elephant?
Chang: Yeah, my club gets together every weekend. You should join us next time.
Honda: I'll keep that in mind. Now let's take a look back at how the fight is progressing.
Chang: It seems Chuck is putting all of his Passive Aggressive training and meditation to good use.
Honda: The ways of Passive Aggressive are an invaluable tool in any Vermonster battle. You know, I've had alittle... HOLY CRAP!
Chang: LOOK! A DeLorean!
Honda: NO, the vermonster has just pulled its most deadly tactic, the dreaded heart attack. This battle is really getting heated.
Chang: Incredible. I didn't think a vermonster this weak was capable of that. They usually are only capable of...
Chang: BRAIN FREEZE! This vermonster is going hog wild folks!
Honda: Let's take a closer look and see what the hell is going on.
Chang: No wonder this thing is flipping out; they've already hit the bottom.
Honda: That may be, but they've still got a ways to go on the other side.
Chang: That doesn't really concern me at this point, I say this vermonster is on its way out. I really think Saker is going to finally get the victory he's fought so hard for.
Honda: I wouldn't call the fight just yet, Chang. Afterall, this vermonster has shown tremendous spirit for its size. It sure isn't going down without taking someone with it.
Chang: You may have spoke too soon, Ed. Take a look back at the field.
Honda: THEY DID IT! THEY DID IT! UNBELIEVABLE! This is a fight that's definitely going in the history books. These rookies have taken that bastard, despite everything it gave them, and taken their prize.
Chang: I tell ya Ed, it's moments like this that... that make you want to eat five more yourself.
Honda: I think I'll join you on this one, Chang. From all of us here at the Ben and Jerry's Arena...
Chang: Good eating everyone.
THE END
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