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It's been quite a while since I've talked to you. How you've been? Good, I hope! As for me, I'm here -- trying to live life again -- learning to live without you. I miss you. I miss your laughter -- that crackle in your voice every time you laugh. I miss your stories of the day and how weird they are. I miss the way you would tell them to me and I miss the way you listen with such fascination to me and my crazy moments. I miss the way you would make light of my dark moments and make me see that the world doesn't revolve around me and my absurd way of thinking -- well, sometimes at least! I wanted to take this time now to ask what happened between us. I thought we had something special going here. Where did we go wrong? Everything started out so right. Yet it all ended in shambles. We could've had a future together. All that talk about growing old together sounded so good. You beside me and me by you. We had everything planned, remember? We were going to finish school and get married. Then you'd whisk me away in some remote place away from my family and yours and we'd just come by during the holidays to visit. We were going to start our life and travel down that road together -- hand in hand, you and me. I really thought you were "the one." The one person that God has put on this world for me and only me. The one person who will be by my side until death do us part. Remember our wedding plans? Of course, it was all in theory but back then it seemed as though they were within reach. Now they seem like they're a million miles away. It's funny, God plays such good jokes on me, huh? For a while there, I thought I've found my share of happiness. Well at least for a while, I felt like I tasted heaven. And that heaven was in you. I don't know why our relationship never had the chance to blossom, as we wanted it to. I don't know why God chose to cross our path for a moment and then made us turn our backs on each other. But I tell you now that you were one of the best things that happened to me in a long time. Through you, I learned to see the real me that's been buried underneath for a while. I thank you for stepping into my life and sharing yours with mine -- even for that brief period of time. I thank you now and tell you that someday I'll look back into this and realize that we could've made it -- if we had only given this a chance. Maybe I have no proof to back that up but like you always said it's a gut feeling -- an instinct. And I felt that between you and I. I felt you and I could've been something. I guess now we'll never truly find out. One day we'll stop to think about all of this and smile. Yet, we'll always have that lingering thought wondering what would've happened. What would've happened to the so-called love we had between us? My answer to that question would be that I loved you enough to set you free because I felt that right now wasn't the right time for us. Maybe someday, somewhere, we'll meet again. I hope so! I hope you understand that when I released you, I released myself. Thank you for the memories. I will forever hold them close to my heart. Thank you for believing in me when no one didn't. And thank you for being yourself. So here's to you my friend. Until we meet again! I won't say 'goodbye' but instead "so long". To you that got away, thank you for the memories and I'll see you again when I travel down that road of life. Hopefully, you'll be in the other end to meet me and then we can continue our plans to grow old together....forever and ever...until death do us part. |
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