TOP STORY: LEAPERS TROUNCE 44's, WARNER INJURED
Lambeau Leapers 113, Syracuse 44's 89 On Thursday night, James Stewart led the 44's to a commanding 27-14 lead. And when a devastating Ray Lewis hit left Kurt Warner with only nine fingers intact, John Stoer had to be thinking his star-crossed team might steal a victory. But master motivator Steve Olsen had a secret weapon: Corey Dillon. Dillon ran roughshod over the 44's defense for 27 points, which may have set a record for ineptitude with 7 points. Dwayne Washington kept covering the wrong wideout, Wayne Chrebet and Isaac Bruce alternated touchdowns to the tune of 38 more points, and that was all she wrote. Said a reeling 44's owner John Stoer, "Corey freakin' Dillon?" One of the few bright spots for Syracuse was Sammy Morris, who teamed with Stewart to give the 44's their best RB output of the season.
Peaks Island Wookies 135, Cookies 94 When Will Mitchell traded stalwart Eddie George, eyebrows were raised. But Mitchell looks like a genius now that Williams has turned in his second straight dominant performance with 30 points. Just as important, reacquired favorite son Drew Bledsoe (16) has inspired Albert Connell to throw off his funk, with spectacular results: Connell chalked up 32 points in week 8 after only 21 in the first seven weeks combined. Even the sheep-loving Bjornson contributed, trebling nobody likes Wesley Walls' measly one point. The result: the second-highest weekly score in league history, just 16 points short of the Cubists' 151 in week 7. The fading Cookies had six players in double figures led by Brad Johnson's 20, but the balanced attack just couldn't keep up with the Wookies' superstar performances. Cookie owner Dan Weitz was seen walking up to strangers, asking how Dallas could score 48 points with Emmitt Smith only getting in the endzone once.
San Francisco Cubists 128, County Coroners 80 Ever since the inception of the league, the Coroners have played the role of the Washington Generals to the Cubists' Harlem Globetrotters. Although the Cubists were flying high after an all-time high 151 points in week 7, the resurgent Coroners looked to make this an exciting matchup. Rich Gannon was back in the driver's seat, and he (15) and Seabass (7) did not disappoint, outscoring their Bronco counterparts to inspire their team. Unfortunately, only the Bus (13) was able to follow their lead, and the Cubists won all the other position matchups. On the other end of the Raider spectrum, Charles Woodson (3) had trouble tackling and Andre Rison didn't seem to have his head in the game at all (1). For the Cubists, Donnie Edwards vaulted to the top of the linebacker rankings with an impressive 16, Eric Moulds filled in admirably for Jimmy Smith with 15, and Stephen Davis rumbled for 19.
Walnut Creek Mountain Devils 96, Bull City Bears 83This hard-fought battle came down to one position: running back. And although Travis Prentice may be a consistent RB some day, nobody is ready to confuse him with Edgerrin James just yet. Edge outscored his counterpart 18-3, and the rest of the team stayted close enough for the victory. Elvis Grbac (17) hooked up with Cris Carter (19) repeatedly and Olindo Mare chipped in 14 to lead the Devils. Sophomore sensation Daunte Culpepper (23), Marvin Harrison (22), and Randy Moss (13) had their mojo working, but the one-dimensional offense wasn't enough to overcome Walnut Creek's balance. The Bears have rushed for only 422 yards this year, which happens to be fewer than all five running backs on the Cubist roster.
P-Miss Envy 70, Anterior Cruciate Legitimate Contenders 62 Peyton Manning scored 23 points but the rest of the Contenders offense scored just 8, and the bottom-dwelling Envy overcame Titanic disappointment to ring up their third win of the season and leapfrog into 8th place. Things looked bleak for the Envy when new Titan Eddie George went down early; worse, Frank Wycheck kept breaking off patterns to check on George on the sidelines. Fortunately, Torry Holt kept his head in the game and turned in an all-pro 15 to lead the team. Steve McNair (7) provided his usual cagey leadership, and Brian Urlacher (4) contributed pure energy and yet another sack. After the game, the owners traded barbs. "Contenders?" scoffed Perry Missner of the Envy? "They'll always be the Dumb, Sad, Brentless Brents." "P-Miss Envy?" retorted a steaming Stephen Johnson. "More like Crap-P-Miss, if you ask me." Blood will surely be spilled when these two squads match up again in week 17.
Week 7 PreviewsThis week, the banged-up Envy stagger into San Francisco for a date with the undefeated Cubists. The free-falling Cookies look to Doug Flutie to help turn things around against the Raiderlicious Coroners. The Wookies will try to feed Ricky Williams the ball again against the stumbling Contenders. The Leapers will try to stay in second place without Kurt Warner against the pass-happy Bears. And the second-hottest team in the league, the Devils, will try to make it four in a row against the proud but unlucky 44's.
---------------------------Perry is better at this press---------------------------------------