A CRUEL SENSE OF HUMOR
I HAD NOT THOUGHT THAT HE HAD EXISTED
THIS ONE THEY CALL THE GOD
HE WAS NOT ON MY SIDE WHEN I NEED HIM
WHEN I WISHED FOR MY LIFE TO END
HE DID NOT YELL FOR ME TO STOP
BUT NOW I KNOW FOR A FACT OF TRUTH
IT IS BUT A CRUEL SENSE OF HUMOR
WHICH HE HAS GOT
THAT ONE I FOUND
AND THOUGH I LOVED
WAS BUT A FRIEND TO ME
THE LOVE DENIED
AND TEARS I CRIED
WERE ALL THAT I COULD SEE
WHY WAS HE THERE
TO MOCK MY HEART
TO BASH MY HOPES AN DREAMS
TO RECEIVE THE LOVE THAT ONCE I GAVE
TO SOMEONE I COULD NOT PLEASE?
WHY WAS HE ONLY LAUGHING
WHEN I TOLD THE ONE I LOVED THE TRUTH
THAT ALL I WANTED WAS UNDERSTANDING
APPRECIATION
ACCEPTANCE?
WHY DID HE MAKE ME FEEL LIKE DYING
WHE ALL CAME TRUE FOR ME?
THE ONE I LOVED WAS RESPECTFUL
AS GOD SAT ON HIS CLOUD
AND ONLY LAUGHED AND POINTED
WHEN MY BELOVED SAID ALOUD
"YOU ARE BUT A FRIEND
AND THE GESTURE WAS TO KIND
SO THOUGH THIS LOVE CAN NEVER BE
WILL IT BE THE FLOOR
OR THIS BED OF MINE"
A HOPE AT ONCE HE GAVE ME
FOR THIS LOVE ONE MADE OFFERS BEYOND BACKTRACK
BUT ALL SEEMED QUITE A DILLUSION
BY SINCERITY BEHIND THIS ACT
I WISHED FOR MY RECEPTION
OF SEDUCTION NOT ALLOWED
FOR THIS MY MORALS WOULD TAKE SHOTGUN
FOR I WOULD LOSE THEM AWFUL PROUD
BUT THIS WAS NOT TO HAPPEN
AS I LAY AWAKE WITH MY LOVED ONE
AT MY SIDE
HEARING SWEET NOTHINGS OF MY SWEETHEART
TOSSINGS
TURNINGS
AS I CRIED
THE MOMENT WAS SO BEAUTIFUL
THOUGH NOT A MUTUAL THOUGHT
AS I FLEED WITHOUT EVEN A SHOWER
MILES FROM THE DESOLATE PARKING LOT
WHY DID I RETURN HOME
TO A JOKE I DID NOT WISH TO SEE
POINTED SOMEWHAT AT MYSELF
WITH NO REGARD TO ME
I SIGHED
I CRIED
I ANTICIPATED HONESTY TO THIS MOCKERY
I LOVED YOU
I CARED FOR YOU
FOR YOU I WOULD PLAY THE FOOL
BUT NOW I AM EVER MELANCHOLY
FOR THE HUMOR WHICH GOD HOLDS IS CRUEL
YOU CAN
USE ME
ABUSE ME
CHOOSE ME
I SIMPLY CARE NO MORE
IT HURTS MUCH MORE TO LOVE YOU
WITH GOD'S CRUEL SENSE OF HUMOR