| ALL THAT JAZZZZZZ |
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| Ahh, welcome to the One Note Cafe, Dean Street, London where the cream of improvisational jazz hides behind the facade of cold blue neon and smoke filled lounges. Tonight, a rare treat, the Algernon Winters Quartet will play an exclusive set just for you, the musically deprived public... ahh... |
| "We'd like to welcome you all to the One Note Cafe. Ahh, a 1, 2, 3, 4..." |
| "Oh, have we started? Ooh, cripes, I wasn't ready." |
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| "Oh, bloody hell, Jeff, I gave you the count-in! You all heard me, didn't you?" |
| "Actually, I didn't hear you Nigel, can we take it from the top again?" |
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| "Okay Algernon... and can you check we're all ready this time? Especially Michael?" |
| "You ready Mike?" "Hmm, er, yep. I'm always ready." |
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| "Superb. Ahh, a 1, 2, 3, 4... |
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| "Ohh... somedays it's hard to relax..." TWOOINNG |
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| "What the hell was that?" |
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| "One of my strings has snapped. I'll get a new one off Michael." |
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| "Michael, have you got any - " "Zzzzzz" "Ohhh, dear..." |
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| "What's going on over there? We've got a bleedin' gig to do, you know." |
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| "One of Algernon's strings has snapped. He's going to get a new one off Michael." |
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| "Yesss, thank you Jeff, I heard that bit. Why's it taking him so long?" |
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| "Psst! Michael!" "Zzzzzz" "MICHAEL!" "Zzzzzz" |
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| "Uhh... hey Nigel, have you ever considered a trio?" |
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| "Haha, Michael's in it now!" |
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| "Um, Algernon, is Michael asleep?" |
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| "Look, not wishing to be tarred with the same brush, whatever Mike is, it's not his fault. He just finds laid-back jazz soporific, that's all." |
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| "Right, Jeff, wake him up and tell him the bad news - he's left the Algernon Winters Quartet." |
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| "Zzzzzz" |
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| "Jeff! JEFF! Oh, what the hell's going on?" |
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| "I've got an idea, Nigel! Jeff and Michael have fallen asleep propped up against their instruments. I don't think the audience have noticed!" |
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| "Are you suggesting we carry on regardless? Is that ethical?" |
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| "Zzzzzz" |
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| "Oh great. Well that's just bleedin' dandy. Is this what modern jazz has come to? Minimal notes attempting to create maximum effect, consequently causing mass narcolepsy?" |
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| Pictures courtesy of allposters.com and www.music.miami.edu/summercamps/ymusic/2002images/index.htm |
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| "Zzzzzz" |
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| "I... I... oh well. Zzzzzz" |