November 7, 2001
So people are pretty selfish, i am coming to realize. even people who i
know well, and am comfortable with--when it comes to doing things for
others, arent too good about that at all. i dont know, i thought being a
friend was doing stuff for others, even when you dont want to. especially
if it's something small. but then, when do you draw the line? and by not
doing something for someone, does that automatically make that person a
jerk? this is not to say that i dont do it as well. but i find myself in
situations often where i said yes to something that i in reality did not
want to do. ahh, the plight of a pushover. i dont know why im talking
about this, just something that has been irking me a little lately.
But of course, any fault i see in others, i have in myself. i do practice
selfishness, i know for certain. at the same time, i find it hard to say
no to people. it's not something i like to do. i dont like it when
others are disappointed or feel bad by my refusal. but i think ive been
doing it more often lately--does that mean im being more assertive, going
for what i want? is that just a nice way of saying SELFISH?
on an entirely separate note, wandering eyes are bad...right bryan? im not
saying bryan has wandering eyes. but some people are better than that,
according to him. they shouldnt be doing that, according to him. and when
he catches them in the act...feeling sheepish. but i must wholly agree.
wandering eyes gotta go.
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