so today was quite a hot day. i was amazed at how hot it was, especially around noontime. wow! summer is here already! that's too bad, though, because i think late fall is absolutely swell. summer is too hot for my liking because i sweat when i get hot, and during the summer it's hot all the time, so i sweat all the time. no fun. also with the bit of humidity in the air today, that made the heat worse. blah.
so, for those who care, it may seem like i have been a bit of a party pooper lately...im not doing potch, im not (probably) going to senior retreat, im not going to senior banquet...and the reason i have been giving for everything is that i do not want to. well, that is partially the reason. there is another, more significant side that i have not spoken to many people about, but will become clear by the end of the week. i have some things to work out still, but everything will be clear then.
on a brighter note, my home church has been fun as of late. there are more kids coming out to youth group, which is always good, though i do feel a bit powerless at times, because there is a language barrier between me and about half of them, because they are much better at korean than english. this makes communication hard, and i dont even know if they understand what im talking about, but it is my duty to teach them. so we'll see what happens. i struggle with this in particular, more than anything else, i think, because i dont want them to just sit there and not understand a word im saying. i feel that the lessons i try to teach, as poor a job as i do, are worth being learned, because they are about our Lord, but i am sure it is difficult for the kids to understand, though they try to stay attentive (at least a part of the time), so i guess i cant ask for much more, i mean, english is not their first language. and another thing, i never know what will happen to them in the future, so who knows, maybe my lessons had some effect, or should i say God used my lessons to have an effect, because it sure wasnt my delivery. despite my lame teaching skills, and the communication barrier, i do enjoy teaching. i really want the kids to have a better relationship with God, and really get to know Him more. they are young xians, but they are all good kids. i think that if i really want them to listen to me, i need to get to know them better, and the only way i see that happening is if i am spending MORE time with them, not only interacting with them, but in prayer. and spending more time with them is what i really want to do, and plan on doing. if this means sacrificing other things so that i can have the time to do so, then that is what i must do. i guess time will tell if that happens.