ALL ABOUT YOU The first series of questions are based on personal information. They are meant to determine specifically what kind of person you really are, so that a computer can classify you based on a "soul scale" which may be able to allow scientists to predict your condiment preference, and also precisely when you will die.
1) How many people are you?
2) What is your gender?
3) What is your hand preference?
4) What is your first name?
5) What is your most commonly-used expletive?
6) During the last (5th) Pistran Civil War, you were...
7) If you were a plant, what kind of plant would you be?
THE CURRENT GOVERNMENT This section is meant to gague your opinions and beliefs on Pistran politics. It is crucial in dertermining whether you will attempt to overthow the government, and precisely how much torture it would take to break you.
8) If the Chancellorship Election were held today, you would...
9) Who is the best Minister on the Supreme Council of Ministers?
10) What, in your opinion, is Pistrix's greatest strength?
11) What, in your opinion, is Pistrix's greatest weakness?
12) Do you believe taxes are too high?
13) The Republic of Pistrix is best represented by ...
WHAT YOU THINK This section is a more personal view of your likes and dislikes, as well as your opinions on general subjects that Pistrans face today. Be careful, while there are no wrong answers in this kind of test, you can sure look stupid if you don't pick the same thing everyone else does.
14) Which sport is your favorate pastime?
15) What do you believe is the best way to destroy the scourge of communism?
16) What is your favorite holiday?
17) What was the most memorable event over the last Pistran year?
18) What was your favorate movie to come out over the last Pistran year?
19) What is your favorate televison program?
AND THE REST This section completes the survey with random questions of no real informative value, but we do enjoy wasting your time. Some of these questions are relics from previous census questionarres, others are taken from telemarketing or focus group sheets. Still others are completely pointless, but do answer them in full, or your entire census application is null and void, and you will permanantly lose citizenship!
20) How many trampolines do you own?
21) How often do you check the "Pistrix Defender" for news?
22) What is the most delicious ingridient in the Super Squishy Milk Shake?
23) If you traveled back in time, and met your parents, you would...
