| Turkey Day Massacre 3!: This time Kenner takes the shotgun to the turkeys that almost ruined Burt Reynolds' career, if not for Boogie Nights the man would be still doing crap like Cannonball Run II! A look at Burt Reynolds' not so stellar career. We will say we write this massacre with slight sadness since I admire Burt Reynolds' screen presence but some of these prompts us to ask what was he thinking? Cannonball Run (1981) Cast:Burt Reynolds, Dom Deluise, Farraw Fawcett, Roger Moore,Jackie Chan,Jamie Farr,Sammy Davis Jr.,Dean Martin The ultimate clunker! This laughable crapfest features many things that defined Reynold's career, such as tons of car chases, horrible acting and utter stupidity, however I must admit that this did have a chance to be enjoyable, if they would've cut the running time by 90 minutes. Unfortunately this crap made money.. D.Hal Needham * Cannonball Run II (1984) Cast:Burt Reynolds,Dom DeLuise,Frank Sinatra,Shirley MacLane,Jackie Chan,Dean Martin,Sammy Davis Jr.,Telly Savalas,Tony Danza, Charles Nelson Reilly Double the stupidity as Reynolds races again to win the cannonball run, like it's awful predecessor this one is jammed back full of cameos and hideous acting which is some of the worst I've ever seen, especially since Charles Nelson Reilly is in it, plus the big joke here is that Savalas calls him "Dumb-Dumb" instead of Don-Don which is his name. Keep your eyes peeled for Sinatra who manages to go out with an embarrassing performance. Utterly stupid. D.Hal Needham * Rent-A-Cop (1988) Cast:Burt Reynolds, Liza Minnelli,James Remar,John P.Ryan,Robby Benson Don't Rent-This-Crap would've been a more appropriate title of this clunker which somehow manages to gather a great cast and completely waste their talents in favor of stupid action and laughably clunky dialog, still i'm not complaining because you know when Minnelli is cast as a hooker and Remar as a killer who likes to breakdance you know you have hit a goldmine with bad movies. D.Jerry London * Physical Evidence (1989) Cast:Burt Reynolds,Theresa Russell,Ned Beatty,Kay Lenz,Ted McGinley Aside from watching hot babes like Kay Lenz and Theresa Russell in very skimpy outfits, this Burt Reynolds movie is just a snooze-fest from beginning to end, with bad acting from a great cast,a story that makes little sense as well as a lousy script fails to really captivate. Although I did find some humor in seeing Jefferson Darcy play a tough guy. Where's Al Bundy when you need him? D.Michael Crichton *1/2 Cop and a Half (1993) Cast:Burt Reynolds,Norman D. Golden II, Ray Sharkey This is the infamous clunker that almost sunk Reynolds career for good. Aside from Roger Ebert this got critically creamed by the critics and rightfully so this is bad, so bad it makes Mr. Nanny seem like Kindergarten Cop and Kindergarten Cop seem like Citizen Kane. I would say that I feel sorry for any poor schmuck who saw this in theaters, but I myself did and never in my life did I feel sorry for myself. However as bad as it sucks it's still the perfect bad movie, afterall it's hard not to get a kick out of seeing Ray Sharkey play not only a tough guy mobster but a Wayne Newton style singer. Awesomely stupid! D.Henry Winkler * |