| Malibu Express (1985) Cast:Darby Hinton, Sybil Danning,Art Metrano Darby Hinton stars as Cody Abilene, a Magnum P.I like private eye who is hired to spy on a family and discover who is trying to sell something advanced to the Russians, while there a blackmailing driver is killed and each family member has motive for killing him, Abilene gets to the bottom of it while women constantly show their bosoms in this dull mystery. I must admit that i'm no fan of Andy Sidaris and his movies, although he was apparently a great football camera man, a pioneer of techniques still used today, his influence on film is nothing but dismal. Despite the plotless story, lack of real action and basically anything of substance, Malibu Express emerges as one of Sidaris' better efforts. Some of the action is okay and Art Metrano (of Police Academy 2 and 3 fame) is hilarious as an assassin and of course there is some nudity that diverts your attention (though this gets to be dull after the millionth time) but mainly this is weak stuff, made with little conviction and only serves to showcase playboy models and their breasts. However since this is an the action section and not in porno, it only serves that this is only for teenagers who aren't at the legal age to rent porn. After all this is probably the closest one gets to porn without actually having to rent one. Plus given the incoherence, lame acting and excruciating comic relief, this is extremely tough going for action fans. Believe it or not, this is one of Sidaris' better features which of course is scary considering how terrible this movie is.. D.Andy Sidaris *1/2 |