Author�s Notes: Just a piece of Mario fluff I wrote on a whim. I thought I should post it since I haven�t updated After the Outing in, like... a few months... Jeez, has it been that long?! What the Hell have I been doin�? I have just realized what a complete and utter bum I am. Slap me, I�m an idiot. My only excuse I can think of is that my start up muse has left to join the Navy. ::growl:: Be all that you can be... Wait a min, isn�t that the Army? ...Whatever. Anyway, she�s the one who always bugged me until I got off my butt and did it. And she�s gone.

Buuuuuut! I�m sure you people don�t want to know about my personal problems.

I just thought you should know that this fic is pointless. Completely and totally inane. There is no meaning behind it what so ever. Don�t we all love little fluffs of nothingness?

Warning: Um... Cuss words? �Course, that�s practically a given in my fics. No blood or anything! Or disturbing images!

The slender young plumber flipped backwards again and again just to get out of his opponent's reach, taking his time when he attained an optimum distance to catch his breath once more. Damned thing just wasn�t dying! He had slammed it multiple times with fire balls, used a few special techniques on it and the thing was way to large to go straight after it in hand to hand. It was all he could do right now to dodge and flip out of the way of it�s sweeping tail and far-reaching grabs. Good thing for Luigi that it was dim as all get out, though.

~I guess it�s a rule with these monsters. Large and all powerful but dumb as Hell.~ Luigi allowed himself a chuckle before scrambling backwards rather ungracefully as the creature tried to step on him. He shook a fist up towards the general direction of it�s face and called out, "What am I now, a bug?" The answer he was rewarded with was yet another grab to pick him up and squeeze him to death. He side-stepped, then did a back-hand spring that sent him sailing cleaning over the monster�s tail as it soared by.

"What? That�s the best you can do? I haven�t been hit on-ouf!" The air was knock out of him as his body was sent tumbling across the ground, skidding a good few feet before sliding to a stop in a tangled heap of limbs. With a groan, Luigi pushed himself off the ground and stumbled back to standing position, brushing strands of hair out of his eyes and back under his green cap.

"Aw, shit." the young Mario brother managed to wheeze out. That stupid thing was preparing to take another swing at him. "Crap. What to do, what to do... Ack! Duck!" He dropped to the dirt as the tail whizzed just barely over his head, the force of it picking his hat right off and caring it along with it all the way back to the monster�s feet.

"No! My hat!" Luigi cried out in an almost anguished voice. Okay, now things were getting bad. His breath was still coming in wheezing gasps, he had no back-up what so ever (Where�s a brother when you need him?), and his hat was gone! You just didn�t mess with a Mario�s hat.

He let out a startled �epp� as the monster charged toward him and he did his best possible dive into the bushes beside him. It didn�t turn out to be exactly a dive, more like a stumble and fall over. Stupid, stupid bruised ribs...

But at least he was safe enough, for now at least. The monster�s stupidity was once again working on the plumber�s side. It was busy sniffing the ground where he had been just second�s ago with the most hilariously confused look at it�s face.

"Okay Luigi, think! You can�t kill it, so... run!" He glanced through the foliage behind him and just saw a cliff. "Oh, great, a dead end!" he moaned, then continued with a muttered, "I hate that word. Dead end. You only use that when you�re gonna die."

Okay, if he couldn�t go backwards, he�d have to go head first. That monster was fast, ungodly fast for it�s cumbersome mass, but he was still faster. He could probably make it past before the dim-wit caught up with the rest of the world and took up the chase. Probably. He was pretty sure he could. Basically sure.

He tensed, sent a silent semi-prayer of "I hope I don�t die too painfully" to whatever God might have been listening, and shot out of his hiding place, picking up more speed as his boots finally stopped skidding over loose rocks. He tore past his surprised opponent in an instant, long legs eating up the distance with ease.

The opposite tree line was coming up fast and through the harsh, pain-induced gasps Luigi could hear the heavy pounding of the monster�s feet slowly gaining momentum behind him. Gritting his teeth, the lanky Mario Brother concentrated on running for his life. But wait! A misshapen lump of green was laying so tantalizingly near in the dirt, just a few feet to the left and... ten feet back. Saving his life or retrieving his beloved cap? Realizing the choice was obvious, he hardened his resolve and quickly threw all his weight to one side, spinning on a heel to start sprinting in the reverse direction without skipping a beat.

This little maneuver just might have saved his life. Because just a few seconds later, the beast came crashing through the exact spot Luigi would have been at, taking a monstrous chomp at thin air that would have split bones.

Luigi didn�t bother stopping to consider his good fate though; he just swept up his hat as he flew by, doing another quick twirl and made a crazed dash through the once again confused creature�s legs.

He finally made it to the tree line and, as the branches whipped by, slashing at his face, actually bothered to slap the retrieved hat back on his head, leaving one hand there to keep it in place. Tress crashed to the ground behind him, and Luigi found out he never realized the clatter of trees being leveled by something large and angry and bent on squashing you like a bug could be so freakishly cool sounding. He took another dirt-tearing leap and realized there wasn�t any ground beneath him anymore. There was, in fact, a bunch of puffy green things, and a little winding blue thing and a bird circling at the height that his head just happen to occupy at that moment.

With a startled yelp, Luigi reached back frantically, hand barely grabbing against a tree limb before gravity decided it was a good time to kick in and he hit the side of the cliff with teeth-rattling force. The thundering noise of the creature sped towards him and then over, as the monster was also caught unawares by the sudden precipice, and plunged straight down towards the puffy green things. Luigi cringed at the very unpleasant squish/splatter/thud sound that came a few seconds later.

The slim man sighed, then cursed at himself for doing so when his ribs protested aggressively at the action. Checking to make sure hat and hand were still in place, the plumber-turned-hero executed a one handed lift, accompanied by much feet scrambling and groans of effort, until he flopped unto flat ground. As he laid there, panting and basically just complaining about the bad luck he had been getting recently, he stared up at the blue sky through green leafed trees. "I am never," he decided after much consideration and announced to the world at large with as much conviction that he could muster. "going to take a walk again. Ever."

Pisces: ::growls and stares off::

::Mario and Bowser exchange looks and carefully creep up to Pisces::

Mario: Uh... Pisces? You okay?

Pisces: ::continues to stare but starts mumbling under her breath::

Bowser: Pisces? Snap outta it woman!

Pisces: ::still no response but a few choice words, such as �kill� and �severe maiming� could be picked out of her mumbling::

Bowser: ::to Mario:: Think I should slap her around a bit?

Mario: ::sharply:: No!

Bowser: But-

Mario: No!

Bowser: ::whining:: But you tried to kill her la~ast!

Mario: Didn�t not! You did!

Bowser: No, you did!

Mario: You did!

Bowser: You did!

Mario: You did!

Bowser: You did!

Mario: You did!

Bowser: You did!

Mario: You did!

Bowser: You did!

Mario: You did!

Bowser: You did!

Mario: You did!

Bowser: You did!

Luigi: ::saunters in, spares the bickering duo the barest of glances before making his way over to the still zoned Pisces:: Hey Pisces, what�s up?

Pisces: ::actually bothers to react, but in a brooding tone:: Don�t know. Never been there. ::lapses back into muttering::

Luigi: Uh...

Peach: ::skips into the room and waves happily:: Hi everybody!

Pisces: ::snaps:: Shut up! Kiiiiiiiill......

Peach: ::freaked look:: What�s her problem?

Luigi: ::shrugs:: Ask them. ::points to Mario and Bowser::

Peach: ::realizes their argument of �You did�s was probably important and decides to leave them be:: Pisces? ::creeps forward:: You okay? ::lightly touches the fic writer�s shoulder::

Pisces: ::spazes out:: DISCLAIMERS ARE EEEEEEEEEEEEVIL!!!!! ::foams at mouth::

::Luigi and Peach both recoil and cling to each other in fright::

Mario: You did!

Bowser: No, you did!