Whatever you do...

 

Chapter three: ...be nice to the guests

 

Meriadoc was lying on the floor. He opened his eyes and after a few minutes he came to the conclusion he couldn’t see a thing. Meriadoc tried to get up, but soon noticed he couldn’t; he felt like he was glued to the floor or something. He panicked, because this was not a situation a hobbit wanted to be in. In the end he managed to calm himself down and took a deep breath. He closed his eyes for a few seconds and when he opened them, he could see, far, far away a little light. No, it was no light, not really at least, it was a light beam that was reflected by some kind of round object. Suddenly the object started to move towards him. It started to move faster and faster. And then, suddenly, Meriadoc saw what it was: it was an axe. A giant axe.

 

“Oh dear! Why do I always get stuck in situation where I’m glued to the floor and a giant axe is coming right at me!” Meriadoc yelled.

 

“No, no, my friend, that’s not quiet true,” a voice said. “This is only the first time you got stuck in such a situation.”

 

 Meriadoc was certain he had heard this voice before, but he just couldn’t remember where he had heard it.

 

“So don’t go making things worse then they actually are, okay?”

 

Suddenly Meriadoc remembered whose voice he heard: “Frodo? Frodo Baggins?” The voice burst into laughter. “Frodo! You have got to help me! I’m about to be split in half by a giant axe!” The voice spoke no more and the axe was now very close. It came closer and closer. “Please! FRODO!!!!!”

 

With that Meriadoc opened his eyes and jumped up. Unfortunately he had been unconscious for an hour or two and his legs weren’t strong enough to carry his weight yet; so Meriadoc fell on the floor.

 

“Ouch…” he mumbled. He lifted up his head and he immediately saw two things. He saw one pair of feet and a giant axe. “AARGH!!!” Meriadoc jumped up, but fell down again because his legs were still too weak. Then he felt how the person that stood in front of him lifted him up and put him back on the sofa, where he had been lying.

 

“You ought to be more careful, Meriadoc!” said a low voice. Meriadoc looked up and saw that the person with the giant axe was in fact Gimli the dwarf.

 

“Surprised to see me, aren’t you?” grinned the dwarf.

 

“What…how long…”

 

“You mean:

 

‘What am I doing on this couch?’ and ‘How long have a been unconscious?’ don’t you?” Meriadoc simply nodded. “Well, let me see…

 

“Me and my friend Dumbar are on our way to a tiny dwarf city in the North of Middle-Earth. I won’t bother you with the details.” At this Meriadoc’s jaw dropped, because normally dwarfs can’t wait to tell anyone who wants to hear it, about themselves. “Yeah, yeah, no comments, please. Anyways, I wanted to step by and see how you all were doing, so me and Dumbar travelled to Hobbiton. When we got here it took an unusual long time before someone came to open the door. And when you finally opened the door, you could only say ‘long time, no see’ and faint right at my feet! I don’t suppose you remember any of that, do you? No? Thought so, anyways, I picked you up and carried you to a couch. I left you there to go and see if there was anybody else in Bag End. Me and Dumbar heard some noise in one of the corridors, but we didn’t know which one – by the way, did anyone ever tell you, that someone could get lost in this house?- now where was I…oh yeah! I found Sam and his wife and a lot of Hobbit children in one of the bedrooms. When I told them you had fainted, your wife Estella immediately hurried of to help you. Sam had just told some of his children, I believe they were called Frodo and Merry, to clean up the mess in the hallway, when we heard someone scream. Me and Sam ran to the place where the sound had come from and there we found Dumbar. He had not seen Peregrin, who had been lying on the floor, and had accidentally kicked poor Peregrin in the head. So now we had two knocked out hobbits! Not to mention two hysterical wives…”

 

“What do you mean with that?”

 

“Well, your wife Estella was certain you were going to die and Peregrin’s wife Diamond gave Dumbar a very hard time. In fact, he felt so insulted that he has left and travelled on by himself. I didn’t go with him, because I first wanted to make sure you were alright.”

 

“Ah, well, ehm, Gimli, if my wife was certain I was going to die, where is she now?”

 

“She is…er…helping the others…”

 

“With what?”

 

“With something very important, I got to go! Bye!!!”

 

And there Merry was, all alone, on a couch, in one of the many rooms of Bag End. After an hour or so, in which nobody had come to talk to him, he finally managed to get up and walk around a little bit. It still cost him a lot of energy, so he lay down on the couch again.

 

Suddenly Meriadoc heard someone passing his room. “Hey! Is anybody out there?!!”

 

The door opened and in came Elanor, Sam’s oldest daughter. “Hello Meriadoc,” she said softly, “How are you?”

 

“I’m reasonably well, thank you.”

 

“Good, you kn…” BANG!!!! Suddenly the hallway was filled with noise and nervous voices. Elanor opened the door and looked into the hallway. The noise came closer. “Sorry, but I have to go!” and she ran out of the room, slamming the door behind her. In a few minutes, the sound had died away again.

 

After another hour in which no one seemed to even care a little bit about him, Meriadoc got up once more and decided to go and see what was going on. In a corner of the room he was in, he found an umbrella which he used as a walking stick. He opened the door and looked into the hallway. Nothing unusual here. Meriadoc closed the door behind him and started shuffling towards another corridor, determined to find out what was going on in this place.

 

He had been shuffling around for several minutes, without seeing anything or anyone. This changed when he reached the Eastern wing of Bag End. In one of the corridors some of the paintings were ripped down and their remainders lay on the floor. Meriadoc found it odd no one had taken the time to clean them up. Then he heard some noise two corridors down the main hall. As he shuffled towards the sounds, he could hear the sounds where actually the voices of young hobbits. He opened a door and he saw Primrose, Bilbo, Ruby and Robin (the four youngest Gamgee children) hiding under a table.

 

“What are you doing there?” Meriadoc asked.

 

“Why are you walking around with an umbrella?” asked Ruby in return.

 

“Well,” said Meriadoc, “I’ve been knocked out for a few hours and I have a little trouble with walking. That’s my answer and now I want to know yours.”

 

“We’re hiding!” squeaked Robin.

 

“From who?”

 

“From the mean dwarf man!” the little hobbit said.

 

“Huh? I don’t think I understand what you mean.”

 

Primrose crawled from underneath the table and said: “We were all looking at our new baby brother, when a dwarf came in, who told daddy you had fainted. Estella screamed and ran out of the room. Daddy got mad at us, not only because of all the mess we’d made in the main hall, but also because our potato fight had probably been the reason you fainted. He sent Frodo and Merry to clean everything up and then all went really fast. We heard a large scream from somewhere in the house and daddy and the dwarf ran off. A few minutes later dad came back to tell us that some other dwarf hadn’t seen Peregrin and had accidentally kicked him in the head. Diamond went really mad and ran out of the room as well. Everybody, except for Rose and Elanor, who remained in with mum, went to see what happened. When we all got there, we saw that Diamond had an awful fight with the dwarf who had kicked Peregrin. This dwarf was very mad and so was she. The other dwarf, the Gimli guy, and dad had just picked up Pippin, when that other dwarf got so mad that he found it necessary to destroy some of our paintings with his axe. There was debris everywhere! Everybody had to hide and the four of us ran in here and we do not dare to go out, oh no!”

 

Meriadoc sighed. “Don’t worry. The mad dwarf, his name is Dumbar, has left Bag End.”

 

The four young hobbits were very relieved. However, they did not wish to stay in that room alone and went with Meriadoc to see if there was anybody in the living room, who could tell them how Peregrin was doing.

 

The nearer they came to the living room, the more noise they heard. Someone appeared to be singing a song. The sound was horrible. When they stood in front of the living room door, they heard someone cry: “Hey-ho, hey-ho, I’m a clown, so don’t frown, cause I’m a clown, hey-ho, hey-ho!”

 

Meriadoc put his hand on the door knot, while the four hobbit children took a few steps back. With one big push, Meriadoc opened the door and the light that came from the fire pit blinded him for a second. Luckily for him, he did see that an object was flying right at him and he quickly opened the umbrella to use it as a shield. Something hit the umbrella and fell on the ground. It was a book. When Meriadoc lowered the umbrella a little he saw an odd event. In a corner of the room sat Estella who was trying to calm down Hamfast and Daisy and in another part of the room stood Faramir and Goldilocks, for once not fighting. Gimli, Sam, Frodo, Merry, Pippin and Diamond were standing around one of the tables. Everybody looked stunned.

 

On the largest table in the living room, Peregrin was jumping up and down; he had tied his jacket around his head as a head scarf and he was busy throwing books around the room, while singing: “Hey-ho, hey-ho, I’m a clown!”

 

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What has happened to Peregrin? How hard was he kicked in the head by Dumbar? Has he completely lost his mind? What can the others do now?

 

Coming soon: chapter 4: …do not forget anything!!!

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