Different Tune to the Same Song
By: Kitty-chan
Chapter 5: The Black Out

AN: This chapter will make up for the lack of humor and shortness of the last chapter (plot mover). Any who, I got my first flame : P The flammer referred to my fic has drowning in crap... well thank you Captain Obvious! This is supposed to be crap! Every author has that fic that is just random, pointless, no sanity encluded, crap! If you wanted angsty-romance-adventure go look somewhere else! Anyway, I thank everyone else for being interested in my crappy little story. ^_^

"Yeah but didn't you see the movie!? You looked like a demented tin man that was possessed!", pointed out the midget.

"Well, you have no excuse for being short! Your not a hobbit or a dwarf your... a morally bankrupt nome!", shot back Sauron.

Saruman looked around the dorm a little confused (walked into this conversation late). He cleared his throat than went on, "My palantir cell phone is running out of minutes."

"What? Who the hell are you calling on that thing?", protested Sauron has he glanced over at the Nazgul who where to busy playing "Grand Theft Auto" to pay attention.

"Well, every other hour some dumb ass calls me. I have no clue who he is."

At that moment Saruman's cell phone rings and he answers, "Sup, this is Saruman speaking."

"This is the Breathing Man and the next victim will be at the highschool prom.", says a heavy breathing voice who is really Denethor.

"Yeah well... click."

"Did you just hang up on me?"

"No, I said click."

"Oh well bye.", he hangs up the phone than picks it up again. "Are you still there?"

"Yeah."

"Oh... than click."

"Did you just hang up on me?"

"Uh... no."

Saruman shrugs and turns off his phone. Sauron and the Morally Bankrupt Nome look at him dumbfounded. "So, who's the midget?", question the wizard.

"It's nome, you ass!"

"Sorry, so... uh... aren't we supposed be laugthing evil like and coming up with plans for world domination."

"Not yet! I'm not proprly ready!", shouted the Morally Bankrupt Nome has he dove into the closet and came out wearing Hot Topic brand goth clothing. "I shall be the Morally Bankrupt Mini-Maia!"

"But your not Maia.", frowned Sauron.

"Well, Mini-Me was taken and the Mouth of Sauron sounds gay."

"Pick another hinchmen name!"

"Hmmm... the Morally Bankrupt Lt. to Sauron."

"That works... what about Saruman? Got any hinchmen names."

Saruman thinks a moment, "Ah ha! Saruman of the Many Colors!"

"It makes you sound like a pansy."

"Fine... the White?"

"That will do."

Suddendly there was a pounding on the door and the voice of Celeborn came from outside, "Damn it, Sauron let me in!"

"Hell, no! Go away, I busy plotting veil acts of evil and so on and so forth.", yelled back the goth.

"Fine, I will slip your mail under the door and go to Abrocrombie without you!"

The Nazgul looked over at their wide eyed master. Who just studdered, "I... don't... shop... there. He's just kinding, right Celeborn?"

"What about that one time you went in there and flirted with the cashier!"

"Uh... simple misunderstanding! I was... uh... hey! The cashier at Preprocrombie is Galadriel! You can't prove that goth kid was me!"

"Thats not what Galadriel told me! Oh, and stay away from my woman! I heard about what you did at that party!"

"Damn Elves."

"Damn Maia."

A letter sliped in under the door and Celeborn's angery stomping could be heard growing fainter. Sauron grabed the letter than opened it.

"It's from Mordor... it's a letter from mum."

"Mum?", asked the nome.

"Silence, I like saying it with an accent! Anyway... Morgoth died... thank god, I thought the old fart would never die!"

"Does it have anything to do with the cyanide we slipped into his dentures?", questioned a Nazgul.

"I hope so. Anyway, blab blab blab... I'm get all of Morgoth crap... blab blab blab.... dude, I'm loaded! Hee Hee, I get the Tower, the Mountain, and everything! Sweet! I'm gonna start my rule of Mordor by setting up a place for a mosh pit!"

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Meanwhile, down in the student lounge. Isildur, Gandalf, Gollum, Bilbo, and Elrond sat around the small round table playing poker. Gollum had a green visor on and dealt out the cards.

"Damn it, I fold.", grummbled Elrond has threw down his cards.

"But we haven't put the bets in", protested Bilbo.

"Quiet, hobbit. The hand sucked so don't rub it in!"

Bilbo shrugged, "I put in my... collector's Coka-Cola bottle"

"Smeagol putss in hiss twenty bucksss"

Isildur ponders for a moment, "I'll throw in this ring I jacked from Sauron."

"I fold.", mutters Gandalf. Has the rest call. Bilbo puts down a four of a kind that was all jacks. Isildur put down a four of a kind with kings. Lastly, Gollum puts down a high straight flush.

Isildur's jaw drops, "But... but my... ring?"

Gollum gather the pot the hissed, "Correction, tis my preciousss."

Gollum takes his winnings and leave to his dorm. Isildur is still looking more wide eyed than Woods did playing Baggines.

"Man, he didn't even let us win our stuff back.", pouted Bilbo.

Just than the lights flickered and than died throught out the campus. "Well, this is pleasant. Now what are we going to do?", grummbled Elrond.

"Damn it, Gandalf did you bring your staff?", came Isildur's voice from the darkness.

"Shit... I left in Isengard along with my Sum 41 CD. Damn it, this isn't my day!", griped the grey wizard.

"Does anyone have a lighter?", questioned Elrond.

Just than nine lighters lite around the outside of the table. "Eeek! Oh... nevermind. It's just the Nazgul.", sighed Elrond.

"What is wrong with you people? Can't you announce yourselves like everyone else? Nnnoooo, you have to sneek up on us!", said Gandalf while he rolled his eyes.

The nome jumped onto the table and pointed a finger at Isildur, "Where is it?"

"Where is what?"

A hand placed itself on Isildur's shoulder. He practically jumped a foot in his chair than noticed the hand only had four fingers and mummbled. "Eww, thats just gross."

"You know exacty what the Morally Bankrupt Nome is speaking of!"

"Oh, hi Sauron. It's just YOU."

The nome grabbed Isildur's shirt collar and tryed to look mean but failed horribly. "Where's da ring, punk?"

Isildur grabed the nome by the back of his shirt and handed him to a Nazgul. "I don't have it?"

"Than where is it?", said the goth with a twich in his eye.

"Er... uh... I lost it in a poker game."

"Great, why didn't my all seeing eye see this coming."

"I don't know but why didn't it see that football coming in the fouth grade?"

"Shup up and don't remind me."

"I think thats the day you started wearing all black. And than their was that tire swing inncident in the second grade... no THAT was when you started wearing all black."

"Why must you bring that up, AGAIN!?"

"Did the rope brake before, during, or after you got on? I can't seem to recall."

"During... but what does that have to do with anything!?!"

"Oh! Elrond do you remember that time in middle school when that rumor went around that Sauron lost his viginatiy to someone on the cheer squad."

"Grrr!"

"Oh, yeah! I remember that. Hey, was that true?", agreed Elrond.

"Well, er... I don't wish to discuss that! Now where the hell's my ring!"

Elrond who was completly ignoring Sauron, went on, "Hey, did you ever wonder why, when Sauron's drunk he's all cuddly with Galadriel who just happens to be a cheer squad leader."

"Eek! O_o", gasped Sauron.

"Yeah! I noticed that too!", shouted the nome.

"Hey!! Your on my side!"

"Well, it's true."

"Grrr, where is my RING!"

Isildur who was looking quiet pleased with himself said, "Lost it to Smeagol. So sorry... not really."

Sauron grabs Isildur's hair and pulls out a bit. "Oww! Shit, that hurt! What was that for!?"

"I need it for my voodo doll of you!", grummbled Sauron has he stormed off with the Nazgul in follow.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

While all this was going on. A hobbit named Bilbo had slipped away unnoticed. He stummbled thought out the long hall in the dark and eventually tripped on his face. His hand landed on a ring that he pocketed. (You don't need a flaming eye to know that was coming)

He found the dorm he was looking for and he could tell it was the room because the of the cursing inside about dropping that damn hunk of gold when the lights blacked out. Soon Bilbo had a long and pointless game of riddles so he could get that damn Cola bottle back.

He finally won and returned to his dorm. Later, Gollum had one last guest. He booted them out after convincing them that he lost the ring. The Nazgul spent the night searching the floor of the hall with only lighters to aid them.

Sauron spent the night cursing himself for not making two Rings of Power. Than went on to bitch about getting crap flung at him all day.


Last word: *clears throat* M'kay that was fun but I'm about to hit the floor from being so tired. It's 5 am and I haven't slept since 3 am yesterday. I hate being an insomanic. So... next chap. is the prom at high school. Tell me who you want to see together. I prefer straight since I'm sucky at writing slash but whatever floats your boat than you can request it. *passes out* bnhgjmnvhhmhn;;;olb *wakes up* sorry, head hit the keyboard. Oh, yeah I give credit to the small part in here I used from "Prom Night".