| Dept. for Big Wrenches |
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| Sgt. Siler is just the type of man women are drawn to like bees to the honey: a little on the shy side, handsome, tall, intelligent - and with very talented hands. Now, to the forces' chagrin, he's also distinguished himself by posing topless in a magazine. Sgt. Siler's decision to shed his uniform as a "page three thunk" caused quite a stir - and extra work for the air force, who had to schedule extra flights to deliver the fan mail pouring in from all over the nation. In August, he received even more proposals (197) than Major Paul Davis (175), which is a new record. We find Sgt. Siler hunched over a motorbike, in company of Major Samantha Carter and Colonel Jack O'Neill. The new object of female desires is a tad bit embarrassed. "I had no idea this would cause so much trouble", he says, and gives us *that* little smile of his which has become his trademark. "It was just - fun. Kinda. Sorta. In a way." We ask Major Carter how she thinks about the sergeants' new fame. "I think this is very regrettable!" she answers briskly, "we don't have time for this nonsense. We got the world to save and a bike to repair." And the colonel? "Ah, I'm kinda cool about the whole thing - of course, we all had rather seen the major here on page 3, but that was not an option." The colonel ducks and manages to get out of the room just before the cup of raspberry yoghurt hits the spot on the door where his head has been just seconds before. So - how did Sgt. Siler, called "Sly" by his friends, get to do the Big Nekkid One? Siler looks uncomfortable, and glances a frightened look at Major Carter, who hammers away on the bike like there was no tomorrow. "Ehr ..." Siler starts, and fiddles around with a wrench, "well, actually ... you know, it was St. Patrick's Day ... the colonel and me had a few beers ... we were singing 'When Irish Eyes are Smiling' ... then there was this bet ... about Sammie - eh, Major Carter's bike ... about the wrench ... he said his was better .... oh, I can't really remember ..." Major Carter slams down the hammer. "The colonel? Bet? Drunk?" she hisses, and slowly moves towards Siler, who visibly shrinks. "First time I hear about that! Don't try to run away, SERGEANT, we got some talking to do here ...!!!" We decide it's better to leave military things up to the military and make our exit. By the elevator, we corner Dr. Jackson, an antrophologist, and ask him how he sees the 'Sly Case'. "Men may serve on navy ships, join the artillery and fly as pilots. So why should they not be allowed to take off their shirts? It's only fair. If we want equal rights, we gotta have them on every level. I can't remember anybody complained when Dr. Frasier was elected Miss Leggie Air Force back in 2001 ..." Winning the support of senior commanders could prove difficult, though. Gen. George Hammond warned in a lecture that "the perils of such behaviour may not be underestimated. Only last week, the security had to remove a nurse from the chimney of Sgt. Siler's house. She'd tried to break in and got stuck." Just when we are about to leave, we bump again into Colonel O'Neill, who bids us his farewell with the words: "If men want to do it, are up to the job and don't distract the girls, I could not care less." So - how are the chances to see him posing for Pink Khaki? We get a downright cheeky grin. "Make me an offer!" he sing-songs, then he saunters off in direction of the canteen, whistling "Sex Bomb". Now we've heard that! Donations are welcome! |
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| ::THUNK!!!:: OF THE MONTH: SGT. SILER |
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| "They just can't keep their hands off my tools!" |