In Whole
2003. Earth. And guess which of our favourite Leviathans is in orbit, who is on board, and who's come to gatecrash the party?
For those of you who missed Kansas, Moya is now in orbit above Earth, 2003. Returning through the wormhole from 1985, John and co board, only to be confronted by Jack and various IASA officials.
So, was it a bass, or a trout?
And now, on Farscape...
Sikozu makes her appearance, finally proving her usefullness. She states that Jack and the other IASA members are, according to DRD scans, from John's species. Jack is astounded with everything. IASA had sent a shuttle up to Moya to open communications. He was astounded when they encountered Sikozu, talking back to them, in English (remember Crichton Kicks). One of the IASA members, advisor to the President, a Mr Tyar, congratulates him on Earth's first contact with extra-terrestrial life. John decides to give him the full monty treatment, and calls the rest of the gang out.
Walking around Moya, Sikozu asks John why he was so late in returning. Moya has remained there for forty-two Earth days. John says there must be some time dilation and asks where Scorpius is. He's in a transport pod at the far end of the wormhole, transmitting a signal so they can find their way back. Sikozu asks what is wrong - these are John's people, and she asks if he thinks Earth poses them a threat. John thinks it's the other way round.
From the memoirs of John Crichton -
Earth. Terra Firma. Seems forever its filled my thoughts, been my goal, and now I'm here. Family, friends, seeing them again is so normal.
John meets up with DK and an old friend, both scientists examining the Farscape module and Lola. They're married now. D'Argo and the others are getting a lot of attention from the press.
I figured Earth would freak out (can't understand the rest - noise of press people - sorry!). Uncle Sam is keeping the aliens safe and contained. A water-front mansion for their own personal use and full security teams standing by. It's a cage. But at least it's a gilded one.
Entering their new home on Earth, Noranti tries the local flowers and likes them. Sikozu meanwhile discovers she hates apples.
Of course the suits are more interested in the technology. So we let them look. They just can't comprehend what they're looking at, much less replicate it. Not yet. So let them look
Cue tests of pulse pistols. Going slightly wrong. DRDs are also injecting some officials with translator microbes, D'Argo acting as "ambassador" to the humans, making sure they understand.
Some of the VIPs have accepted translator microbes. But even translator microbesare gonna help some people listen, not that you can blame them.
Cue D'Argo trying to warn a scientist of the shield round Lola, but it knocks him back.
At least the alien life's not going too crazy.
Cue pool scene, Chiana and Sikozu in bikinis. John's cousin Bobby snooping round with a camcorder, getting a few "quality" shots.
My family has been helping out. My sister, Olivia, has been hanging with them. And my cousin Bobby. Bobby has been totally fascinated with the ETs. Sparky and Wrinkles, they're the happiest of the crew. They're in gastro-heaven.
Noranti is giving Rygel another "human delicacy", what she claims is "cop-porn". In fact, it's unpopped pop-corn, and she pours it quite happily into Rygel's mouth. Rygel seems to love it in fact.
But Tyar Holt. He is not happy.
John and Tyar walking around the IASA grounds, discussing a trip into space for 500 select people. Who to pick? John wants to leave it up to the Nobel commitee. Tyar wants simply to "keep it local" i.e. red-blooded Americans. The Farscape project was, after all, an American-funded initiative and America should, Tyar says, be the first to profit from it. Turns out Jack actually said something like this. Jack is also being made IASA's project director for extra-terrestrial studies.
Which brings us to dad. Dad... Dad's world is upside-down. So he's trying to put it right-side-up by putting up Christmas decorations. Christmas decorations, even though it's Florida and the whole block is cordoned off with security. Family traditions were supposed to bring us together and to make everything normal...
Aeryn is pondering over the rituality of Christmas, while the family - John, Jack, Bobby and Olivia, are going over old family moments - cats stuck up chimneys, riding lessons, and photo albums, when John's ex Caroline arrives, and Aeryn is made to feel even more inadequate than she did before. Seems Caroline still feels something for John.
But things have changed. No we don't get to close our eyes and pretend they haven't. And everyone is telling me how different I am. They're right. But they don't have a clue why. They can't know what I've seen, what I've done, what's been done to me... They can't know what's out there waiting for them and I can't tell them because they wouldn't believe me. Hell if I tried they'd lock me up.
Caroline finds John at the old fishing hole, writing his memoirs. Seems they're getting closer, on this weekend away from work.
John is watching TV alone - a program about the social and psychological implications of the alien's discovery. Jack arrives, tells him that every nation is demanding access to the alien technology and information. John sees no problem with that, but Jack thinks it'd be used against them. John says that space travel was Jack's dream to unite mankind, and Jack says that changed with September 11th. The world has changed, now into survival. New global situation and all that. John is going into space the next day, check everything is OK on Moya, and invites Jack to join him.
Back on Moya, new alien thing that Grayza left is going about it's business as a transport pod lands, D'Argo, John, Jack and Bobby arriving. 1812 will give Jack and Bobby the tour, John quickly oiling 1812. Aeryn arrives, having checked her Prowler, and really gives John a cold shoulder. D'Argo leaves to check command, while John asks Aeryn if she wants to leave her Prowler on Moya - the IASA scientists have enough to contend with sorting out the module and Lola. Aeryn asks if she should stay on Moya as well. She feels she isn't fitting in. She reluctantly decides to go to Earth though and let the scientists check her Prowler.
Meanwhile, on the command carrier, Grayza puts some weird green thing on Braca's head, allowing him to act as a telephone to the creature on Moya. Braca will not remember a thing anyway. The creature, called Skreeth, aknowledges it is aboard Moya with John. According to reports, it says, Moya is now orbitting John's home planet, but Skreeth has no idea where it is - they travelled through a wormhole to get there. Grayza gives it new orders - find out as much as it can about Earth - people, defenses, location. Skreeth suggests interrogating Crichton, but Grayza does not allow it - Crichton has proved resilient to interrogation in the past. She orders Skreeth to remain hidden and get information. Skreeth, it seems, can now turn himself invisible. Disengaging the link, Grayza gives Braca the excuse that they took a short break for "recreation". She gives new orders now - to prep the command carrier to destroy a planet.
Back on Moya, John says its going to be 70 arns before the wormhole is stable to go back through. D'Argo says Pilot and Moya are looking forward to giving humans their first trip into space, a reference to giving 500 humans a trip to space. But John's plan is to leave without them, while they're still bickering over who gets to go. John will leave, before any of his enemies from the Uncharted Territories gets the chance to find them.
Jack finds Aeryn ready to go back down to Earth, and she gives Jack a lift down, but not before swinging past Saturn. Jack says John is having a tough time re-adjusting and seems distant. Geneticists are looking at whether humans and sebaceans are linked as well - Jack wouldn't be surprised if they were. They briefly talk about Aeryn's relationship with John, and how Jack doesn't see Aeryn as an alien life-form. Aeryn thinks John doesn't have feelings for her any more.
Back on Earth, Sikozu has gotten the hang of a mobile phone and is complaining over biological examination, while Rygel eats many burgers and Noranti tries to sing Christmas carols. Sikozu wants to head back to Moya - Chiana gives her a present to give to Pilot. At least she cares.
Meantime, Jack is talking John's ear off over his little trip to Saturn and beyond. John wants a little support about international tech sharing and who gets to go on Moya. But Jack can't do anything. John is annoyed - Earth has to work together. Jack has lost a lot of his spirit from his old, idealistic days.
DK and his wife can't figure out the add-ons to John's module, and are angry with him for not knowing everything about it. John has also asked for an analysis of the metal used in the ships, to try and figure out why the first Prowler pilots to try wormhole flying turned to goo. However, Skreeth has got back down to Earth.
Going to their car with armed guard, DK and his wife are attacked by Skreeth. The guard is easily destroyed, and Skreeth pins DK and wife and mentally interrogates them. Relaying messages back to Grayza at the same time (he's a clever little beastie) Skreeth cannot find any wormhole technology in their minds. Skreeth is confident he can capture Crichton, but of course cannot take him to Grayza, and nor can Grayza reach Skreeth. Skreeth will still try to take Crichton and interrogate him as best he can. DK and wife having proved their usefullness, Skreeth executes them.
John is going through his old photo albums when Olivia arrives, having been shopping with the crew of Moya. John feels so alienated, recognising the pictures but it feels like a different life. John feels as if he can't talk to his father really because what he hears, the government will invariably hear. John confesses that coming to Earth was a mistake, and there's stuff the government can't hear.
The next morning, the aliens return from another bout of shopping. Aeryn asks if John is there. He isn't, but his cousin Bobby is, interviewing his old girlfriend Caroline. Aeryn goes to see them, Bobby leaves. Aeryn has a heart-to-heart with Caroline, about Aeryn's relationship with John. Aeryn is convinced that John saying he doesn't want Aeryn means just that, but Caroline tells him he's just trying to convince himself that.
Back on the other side of the wormhole, Sikozu has barely managed to go through it intact. Her transport pod and Scorpius' are linked. Scorpius says he will stay in case Grayza arrives. If she does, he will detonate the transport pod in the mouth of the wormhole, destabilizing it and killing him. Sikozu is concerned, and seems to want to stay with him.
Back on Earth, D'Argo informs John that Pilot says Sikozu left through the wormhole, never to return to Earth. Jack and Tyar are talking, Tyar ordering Jack to make John bend to their will, not to share the tech and so on, impound the tech as a security risk and not share it with international bodies. Jack however, makes a little speech to the entire assembled crowd, officials and press, about how much Earth owes John, and that the technology and information should be shared. He also says he trusts John about what will happen if the technology isn't shared. Jack invites all nations, there and then, to participate in the ongoing Farscape mission. John starts the applause, the rest feeling shamed to follow.
Afterwards, John and Jack leave to celebrate Christmas Eve, stalked however by Skreeth.
Aeryn arrives at the Crichton household, meeting with Olivia. Aeryn returns the books and clothes she borrowed, happy really with how she is. Aeryn says she may be leaving, claiming possibly to be needed on Moya.
Back at the party/photo op at the labs, Chiana is doing her usual act of seducing ("spank you very much"), but D'Argo leads her away. In the parking lot however, they find the bodies of DK and his wife.
Jack and John get to the Crichton household, and are greeted by Aeryn. In a private moment, Aeryn and John talk about whether she should stay. John says it's up to her, but Aeryn wants him to decide, wanting to know whether he would be happier with her not on Earth. Meanwhile, Skreeth makes his move, taking out Olivia, the armed guard, and throwing Jack through a wall (note - scene from Unrealized Reality here). John and Aeryn pose more of a problem, and after utterly wrecking the house, Aeryn drops a chandelier on Skreeth. However, it's not over, and Skreeth gets up, ready for more mischief, just as D'Argo arrives in Lola and vaporises the annoying creature from the comfort of the back garden. Braca, on the command carrier, is not impressed but easily sated by Grayza's cooings of "that was the best yet, captain".
Arriving back on Moya, the crew are ready to leave. Rygel of course gets all the food, and Aeryn decides that all the presents she has bought for Crichton will go in the cargo bay for the moment, and Aeryn questions Noranti about the drugs she's been supplying to John. Noranti tells her it's to forget, but doesn't say who to forget. Meanwhile, John is back on Earth saying goodbye to Jack and Olivia. Olivia gives him his mother's old wedding ring, and Jack tries to convince him to stay - says a defense shield will be put up round the wormhole and they'd be all right. He knows John is doing it to protect Earth. John does promise however that he will return.
But in the end, John puts his shades back on, and walks away...

What I thought
Good. Confusing but good. And there are some really great moments. John's memoirs make an excellent voice-over, as he recounts his feelings about being back on Earth with his new-found friends. The relationship between John and Aeryn gets even more complex with Caroline, John's ex, coming back into the picture, and there are still a few funny moments, especially Noranti singing Christmas carols but getting the words wrong ("Glory to the nude boat king" indeed!). The new alien, I forget its name but it shall be in soon as I review the episode in full, is creepy, and Grayza is proving how much of a cow she can be, convincing Braca that they keep having sex. Ultimately though, it finishes short of how it could have, very abruptly. John should have also emphasised more how much Earth is under threat. I would give it a 4 out of 5.

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