THE ENORMOUS RADIO

What the enormous radio did for the Westcotts was to
make them see that they should fix the problems in
their family life instead of worrying about their
outer image -- especially since the lives of their
neighbors were just as troubled as their own.

	
INT. HOTEL -- DAY.
A MAN and a WOMAN are sitting in the lobby of a hotel, at a coffee bar or something. They are watching the elevators.

WOMAN
You're funny.

MAN
Huh. Am I? 
(Long pause as they watch the elevators disgorge more people)

There are a lot of things that don't have names, for some reason. Nameless yet familiar phenomena.

The Man looks at the people going by.

MAN
(To the woman, appraising her)
Are you all ready? You have your --
 
WOMAN
I'm not a child! But it's sweet of you. I've got everything.

MAN
Got your toothbrush? -- Just kidding.

WOMAN
No. I'm ready. 
(Looks in her purse briefly, mentally goes through a checklist. Nods to self, closes purse. Reaches into coat pocket to determine that her ticket or something is still there.)

MAN
You look fine!

WOMAN
(Seeing a dog somewhere behind the man).
What a cute dog!

MAN
(Twisting around to see, apparently the dog is somewhere behind him)
He looks like a fag.

WOMAN
Don't be stupid, how could a dog be a fag?

MAN
Look at that cute guy!

WOMAN
Who?

MAN
The guy. In the dark blue overcoat. Near the ... near the woman with the thing. He's wearing a dumb hat. No, there. 

WOMAN
(Twisting around, trying to see without much luck)
Sitting down?

MAN
Yes. No, now he's standing up. He has an accordion or something.

WOMAN
Oh, him. He's ... okay.

MAN
What do you mean, he looks like David Bowie.

WOMAN
Poop.

MAN
I wonder if it's David Bowie?

MAN
I mean, how much does a kidney go for in Europe?

WOMAN
... I think he said something like ... 16 thousand euros.

MAN
Dollars? Or euros?

WOMAN
... Euros. 

MAN
Oh.

WOMAN
I'm pretty sure.

There is a lull in the conversation as the two go back to watching the elevators expectantly. After a few elevators, the woman turns to the man and goes on with some story she was telling earlier, as if remembering a choice bit.

WOMAN
And she says, "I don't know if I can go through with it." You know, "I can't handle it anymore, I've got to get out." And she says, "Now, don't let the family down, we're counting on you." You know, a lot of pressure.

MAN
I'll say!

WOMAN 
I won't even tell you how much I wanted to cry.

(Discreetly and quietly, as if pointing out some broccoli on his teeth.)
Eee ... you're bleeding again ... 
(Gestures to her own mouth as she peers at his face.)

There is some blood in his mouth, a small trickle has come out on his chin. The Man looks a little disappointed.

MAN
Oh. 
(He gets a paper napkin and dabs at it)
Crap. I wish that would stop.
(He dabs again, looking at Woman to judge if he has caught it all)
It's not too bad. I think that's it.

WOMAN
(Looks doubtful and somewhat dismissive.)
Well, you can't go around like that.

MAN
It's stopped! 

At that moment the elevator opens. This is the one they have been waiting for. The woman is excited, takes the thermos contining the kidney, kisses the man, and hurries to take her place. The man watches her wistfully, happy, yet all wistfull. A determined trickle of blood runs out of the corner of his mouth as he smiles even more broadly and waves.  

WAITER
(Off)
I'm sorry sir. I'm going to have to ask you to leave.

MAN
Huh? Yes, just, uh ...
--------
FADE OUT.

THE RADIO (Adapted from John Cheever’s the enormous
radio)

INT KITCHEN- DAY
At the kitchen table sits IRENE WESTCOTT, a rather plain woman of 26 with brown hair, dressed in an ill-fitting casual business suit. Standing at the counter pouring himself a cup of coffee is JIM WESTCOTT a man of 35 nicely dressed in business attire. They are listening to classical music on the radio. Both seem to be enjoying it though not paying it particular attention.

(breakfast scene  where neither of them speak to each
other as they both head off to work)

Living room scene where IRENE tells JIM that “I don’t
think the radio is working anymore” he grunts and
verifies for himself that – yes- indeed it appears the
radio does infact not function any longer.

Kitchen- Irene has gotten them a new radio - she
adjusts the dials, fiddles, turns it on- The radio
comes on at an extraordinarily loud volume, she turns
it down , the dial set to her favorite station- and
listens peacabley the sound really quite fine quality.
She listens for a bit- then the music becomes
scratched with interference.

Kitchen- later- Jim comes home
Is that the new radio? Let’s hear it.
Yeah- but it doesn’t seem to work properly
How could it not work properly
Jim goes to the radio- fiddles with the dial turns the
radio on and all that can be heard are various noices
like : a telephone rirging- elevator- muffled voices-
television- vaccum cleaners- fiddles with the knobs
and cannot get the noices to subside. Jim turns the
radio off. Says- I’ll look at it tomorrow- they eat in
silence with nothing to talk about. Without the music
things are awkward.

Int. Living room evening
Jim comes home to find Irene listening to a chopin
prelude-
It works! 
Jim is too tired to make the pretense of sociability,
nods, comes in takes shower, microwaves some leftovers
hears the music. Then hears a voice breaking through
it is a man.
MAN
For christ’s sake, Kathy do you always have to have
the t.v on so loud when I come home?
KATHY
It’s the only chance I get- I’m at the office all day
MAN
So am I 

Jim thinks the voices are coming from hi apartment-
goes to living room – the radio is playing music
again- looks imploringly to Irene- she is asleep?

JIM
Did you hear that?

IRENE
(tired)
What?

JIM
A man and woman talking

IRENE
Probably some radio play

voices brak through again Irene is shocked recognizing
them to be their neighbours from downstairs- they
listen then immediately adjust the dials – more voices
Jim goes over to the radio and says “hello” loudly but
the voices keep talking uninterrupted.

IRENE
I guess they can’t hear us.

They listen to some random harmless converstion
Switch to a party - woman shrieking gaily.

IRENE
That’s joe fuller in 11-E, I saw him come home with a
bunch of stuff for a party.

They listen then go to bed. Irene gets up in the
middle of the night to get some water then decides to
go into the living room and listen to the radio.
She hears a older man looking after his ill wife
A cough

MAN
Are you all right

WOMAN
Yeah- but I just- I’m all right- but I just never feel
like myself anymore- sometimes there are about fifteen
minutes in the week when I feel like myself- I don’t
like to go to another doctor- doctor’s bills enough-
but I just don’t feel like myself.

Irene goes back to bed, a wrinkle on her forehead

INT- LIVING ROOM – MORNING
Irene and Jim are getting ready to leave for the
house, Irene feighns she has forgotten something
instead of leaving for work she goes in to listen to
the radio.

IRENE  turns the radio on and hears a woman pleading
with her daughter to get ready, the 
KID
I hate school- I don’t want to go to school

WOMAN
You will go to school

KID 
I don’t feel good

WOMAN
You WILL go to school- you will go if it kills you- I
am not in the mood for THIS. Not this morning - 

Irene switches the station - Montage sequence where an be heard: Breakfast eating, sex, prayer, a one sided conversation of vanity. Irene turns off the radio and frowns.

INT- LIVING ROOM- NIGHT.
Irene hears Jims key in the door and jumps up from the
radio like a criminal. Irene is sad and vague when Jim comes in – but he does not notice- he showers and microwaves some left overs.

JIM 
Let’s listen to that radio.

IRENE
You listen honey. I’m not in the mood.

Jim turns on the radio to listen for a bit but doesn’t
seem to find anything extrodinary. Irene waits for Jim to fall asleep then she listens to more depressing problems. She finally hears a raging argument between a man and a woman. He sounds as if he is about to beat her. IRENE runs into the bedroom and implores Jim.

IRENE
They’re having a fight upstairs- go up to 16 C jim!
They’ve been fighting since midnight Jim comes out to the living room to hear the obscenities and thuds 

JIM
You know – you don’t have to listen to this sort of
thing. It’s like looking into windows- you know you don’t have to listen to this sort of stuff.

IRENE
It’s so horrible
(sobbing)
I’ve been listening to it all day-and- its so
depressing

JIM
Well if it's depressing, why do you listen to it- you
bought the radio for pleasure.

IRENE
Don’t – don’t fight with me.

She rests her head on his shoulder.

IRENE
Everybody else has been quarelling all day They’re all worried about money- and 12 B is worried about his mother dying of cancer in florida and some woman is having these horrible affairs and seems to think it’s some kind of comedy and this man is losing his job and just drinks and gets drunker all day and now this man is beating his wife- it’s so sordid.

JIM
Well why did you have to listen to it all?

IRENE
Don’t don’t don’t- I mean we’ve never been like that
have we baby? We’re happy aren’t we honey? I mean we
are happy right?

JIM
(beat)
Yeah- yes of course
(he seems to be convincing himself aswell as Irene)
Jim draws Irene closer and strokes her hair.

JIM
Of course we’re happy

IRENE
You love me don’t you?

JIM
My poor baby- of course I love you

IRENE
And we’re not hypocritical and nasty- or worried about
money- or being 

JIM
No baby, no.

INT. LIVING ROOM DAY
The old radio is gone and jim brings in a new radio. 
Irene turns the radio on cautliously and hears a
Spanish sweet
They smile
And listen

JIM
I had to pay like two hundred dollars for this thing-
because it’s got satellite radio and you can filter
out commercials and stuff - you can also dock your
ipod - but after this we have got to tighten the purse
strings a bit. 
(beat)
This is like the last extravagance that we can afford
for a while, so ...

IRENE
Yeah- I know- but- I’m not the one who had to by that
new computer I was fine with the old one-

JIM
Except that we needed that for work and there are a
lot of sillier things we have spent money on- like  a
lot of the  money we spent on the trip to Canada-
It’s just that we aren’t making as much as I had hoped
last year- at work no one is buying anything and we’re
spending all our time promoting new issues.

IRENE
(looking pale)
Yes dear,

JIM
I mean to be perfectly frank -- we have to start
thinking about saving and paying off those loans. I
really have been working so hard and it seems like a
lot of my energy has been wasted away on stuff for the
apartment and radios and -- it’s like I’ll be paying off loans until I’m 70.

IRENE
Please Jim -- they’ll hear us.

JIM
What?

IRENE
The radio.

JIM
Oh I am sick. I am sick to death of your apprehensiveness -- the goddamn radio can’t hear us, nobody can hear us -- and if they can -– who cares?

Irene looking hurt gets up from listening to the
radio and goes to her room

JIM
What’s made you so goddamned Christly all of a sudden? Hmmm? Who was it that stole your mother’s jewelry from your sisters before the probated the will? I’ll never forget how cool and casual you were. And remember when you made Grace Howland’s life a pure misery when she started at the office -- you just did not stop at anything to torment that girl with you passive aggression -- where was all your virtue when you
were at the abortionists?

Irene turns on the radio at her bedside to drown out
her husbands abuses:

RADIO NEWSMAN
(Suave and non-commital)
An early morning disaster in Tokyo has killed 29 people. A fire in a Catholic hospital near Buffalo for the care of blind children was extinguished this morning the temperature is 47 the humidity is 89……

END