A copy desk chief  is captured by cannibals but, thanks to his wit, is able to survive and adapt to their ways.  Soon he becomes head of the tribe and to celebrate asks for a totem pole to be made out of a single stack of the skulls of his vanquished enemies. The tribe's artisans are so excited that they make a pole twice as wide as he requested. At the unveiling ceremony, the chief looks at the structure, strokes his chin, then tells the creators that they'll have to try again. Bemused, they ask why.

"I'm sorry," he says. "But I asked for a one-head column, and you sent me a two."

Q: A publisher, a reporter and a copy editor are having a business lunch when an explosives-filled truck hits the restaurant, killing everyone inside. Who survives?

A: The copy editor, because she was eating at her desk.

Q: What do you call a copy editor with a special calendar to keep track of social activities?

A: An optimist.

A reporter  dies and goes to journalist heaven, where St. Peter issues him a harp and a set of moderate-sized wings. "These seem kind of small," the reporter complains. "Well," says St. Peter, "Wing size here is determined by how much abuse you suffered in your earthly life. See that guy with the butterfly-sized wings? He was a publisher. And the person with condor-sized wings? She was a night city editor."

Just then a squadron of F-16s roars overhead, forcing the two to hit the dirt.

St. Peter stands up, dusts himself off and mutters: "Damn copy editors."

A copy editor goes to the eye doctor for a new prescription. When she picks up her frames, she finds they are much too small. She goes to work anyhow but struggles to be productive through the pain.  Eventually her chief comes over to ask why her headlines have been so awkward all evening.

"It's these specs!" she cries. "They're too  tight!"

Q: What did the copy editor say after demanding that  he be shifted to a job that gave him day hours, a better wardrobe and the chance to interact with someone who wasn't a fellow journalist?

A: "You want fries with that?"

A copy desk chief is at his front door, talking to an intern, who is standing on the porch with a hammer, some nails and a pile of lumber. The chief says, "I appreciate your being here, but I guess I should have been specific when I said I wanted  you to work on a new deck."

Q: How many copy editors does it take to change a light bulb?
 
 

A: None. They're used to being kept in the dark.

A: Two, but it would have been a better change if I'd had a better spec.

A: One, but she has to call the originating desk first.

or

A: Is "change" the right word here? Because you're not really "changing" the bulb, you're replacing it.
 
 

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