LAST WILL AND TESTAMENT
(From the Panther’s Clause – April 19, 1976)
Once upon a time in this vast universe there existed a planet known as Earth. On this planet there existed a small portion of civilization known as Pflugerville. It came to pass in the year 1976 that 58 technologically oriented humanoids would soon depart from their knowledge cubicles. If our dominion of comprehension is too copious for your mental integrity, we shall endeavor to make ourselves a trifle more explicit. In other words: 58 high school students were about to graduate. Therefore, with great pleasure, extreme dignity, and a sense of total and irreversible insanity, we, the 1976 Pflugerville High School Senior Class hereby bequeath to the Juniors the following articles most treasured by us. We’ll begin with bequeathments concerning a place which has taken up most of our time: Our dearly beloved school.
First of all, the Senior Farm Power members will Tracy Seaton a can of paint and a set of socket wrenches. Charles Anderson wills his brother Clinton Anderson an Allis-Chalmers Tractor. Have fun in Farm Power and Machinery. Kirk Harris, Scott Johle, and Charles Anderson will to Brian Weiss, Carlton Hamann, and Mike Whittaker the ability to skip and not get caught. Deanna Ward and Patricia Brown will their ability to stuff envelopes after lunch to Don Taylor and Larry Pinkston. Connie Johnston and Nancy Ihlenfeldt will all their nursing home films to Debbie Brown and Denise Doherty (so they can watch them all the time). Peggy Towery and Sharon Mogonye will all of their best friends in the Junior Class to Terry Wiginton and Rhonda Moe. Jimmy Mason wills Julie Blackburn his ability to tell people to shut up at Student Council meetings. Mike Bartz wills Carlton Wingard a front row seat in his mother’s chemistry class and his muscles. Rhonda Sandifer wills to Donny Miller and Danny Scott her ability to give a sob story and get out of class. The Senior cast members of “Gammer Gurton’s Needle” will all of their medals, trophies and acting ability to the Junior Class. Terrie King wills her green thumb to the Ag Boys. Charles Courtney wills Bobby Krueger his mother. Bobby, you can start calling her mother anytime you want. Keith Conner wills Al Block and Glen Villoz his ability to short out the entire electrical system of Pflugerville with a flip of a switch. ZEMBAC Productions wills to Ricky Mouser a starring role in all of their upcoming productions. Ronald Riewe wills to Jim Lopez his ability to stay straight and go to school at the same time. Deanna Ward, Patricia Brown, Katie Roberts, and Connie Johnston will their ability to swing on the park swings at lunch to Billy Spivey, Alfred Stehle, Bruce Dalgliesh, Mike Thomison and Garth Tobler. Have fun guys.
All of you Junior sports lovers had better brace yourselves, for you are about to receive a torrent of athletic abilities. Are you braced?
Dean Villoz wills his basketball ability to Jimmy Habecker. Doug Walther wills JaRetta Parker a kidney and his tennis ability. Charles Courtney and Larry Dybdahl, the senior bench buddies of the basketball team, will a pillow to Rocky Lawrence for next year to buck it out on the bench. Charles Alba wills his linebacking ability to Carlton Wingard. Mike Rhodes wills his coordination to Jimmy Habecker. Victor Pena wills his endurance in running to Tommy Allmon. Ronald Krueger wills his athletic ability to Larry Pinkston. Aaron Thomison wills his graceful speed to Milton Gooden. Doug Walther wills Richard Sanchez his good football ability and his ankle. Kim Jorgensen wills her expert ability at running barrels, poles and tying goats to Jon McWhirter.
Now for the time when strange and unique things begin to happen – after school.
Larry Dybdahl and Mike Bartz will Jimmy Havins a case of beer and hope he finishes it before next year’s prom. Lee Garner wills his ability to stay sober to Dan Nowland, Rocky Lawrence, Carlton Wingard, and Dale Moorehead. Gayle Stabeno wills Sam Jones her ability to do imitations. Sheila Randig and Peggy Towery will Kelly Strange their ability to stay home on Friday and Saturday nights (this includes staying out of mischief). George Gonzales wills Roger Richter his ability to play the guitar. Larry Root wills Don Ahr all his paraphernalia. Sweet dreams Don. Last but not least, Jeannie Mills and Sharon Mogonye will their ability to go out without having to say “May I?” to Nancy Priem along with a pair of tight blue jeans.
Now we turn our interest to the transportation division of the Senior Class. First of all, the Senior Class would like to will its total coverage in auto insurance to the A.J. Foyts of the Junior Class. Doyle Schmidt wills his collection of speeding tickets to Mike Thomison. Sheila Randig wills her driving ability control to Jim Beene. Scott Johle wills Mike Wilkes a new set of Dunlop tires. Dean Villoz wills all the safety features on his motorcycle to Gary Jones. Randy Moe wills the ability to hook up a trailer to Bobby Wiginton. Larry Dybdahl and Doug Walther will Ricky Mouser a 1947 Studebaker for his used car lot. And then Mike Beers wills Denise Darland another chauffeur for free rides to and from school every single day of the fiscal year.
One of the touchiest of subjects, no pun intended, will be dealt with now. Romances!!!
Terri Mouser wills her ability to get a promise ring from a guy named Ricky to JaRetta Parker. Gayle Stabeno and Grace Muehlbrad will their ability to get dates to the Senior Prom to the Junior Girls. GOOD LUCK!! Marcella Medford wills Denise Davis her ability to stay with one guy. The Senior Class wills Bobby Vitek to Brenda Alley. You can have him. Debbie Anderson wills her large engagement ring to Vickie Anderson (hope she gets him someday). Linda DelaRosa wills her ability to control men to Tami Oertli. The Senior Class wills Joy Bohls to Albert Block. You can have her, too! Mark Allen wills his ability to stay with one girl to Dale Moorehead. And lastly, Larry Dybdahl wills Mike Seaton a bigger car to go parking in since he likes the tall ones.
Now for a personal touch to our will – we have students, soon to be ex-students, who would like to leave some physical and personal characteristics to be preserved for posterior --- er, that should be posterity.
Stacey Seale wills her ability to get along with other girl classmates to Denise Davis. Doug Walther wills Debbie Gracy his ability not to turn red. Dean Villoz wills his hot temper to Connie Smith. Sherl Gault and Jamye Mott will their voluptuous bodies to the Junior Girls. Don’t worry girls, there is plenty to go around. Jeannie Mills wills Pam Jones her straight hair. Joy Bohls and Rita Morgan will Wanda Wendland their ability to eat and eat and eat and never gain a single pound. Bobby Vitek wills Dan Nowland his muscles and a new shovel to scoop poop. Patricia Brown wills her ability to talk to just about anyone to Dorothy Davis. Tommy Ellisor wills his suntan to Wesley “Whitelegs” Queen. Molly Krause wills her deafening voice to Melinda White. Kerry Conner wills his ability to drink to Danny Scott. Patricia Brown wills her never-ending giggle to Brenda Alley. Terri Mouser wills her quietness to Peggy Ihlenfeldt. Timmy Heine wills his neck to Eric Hodgson. Jamye Mott wills her cast and ability to walk on crutches to Julie Blackburn. Kay Roberts and Molly Krause will their ability to count calories to Michele Boudreau. Mike Beers wills his Yankee accent to Glen Villoz. Judy Allen wills her talkative nature to Debbie Schlomach. Karen Frosch, Bridget Strange, and Doneva McCord will their top-heaviness to Mary Ann Beers. Stacey Seale wills her nose to Nancy Priem, Cindy Langham, Carol Rhoden and anyone else who wants some. Grace Muehlbrad wills her waddle to Diana Jones. Larry Root wills his afro to Charles Sorrells and Milton Gooden. Victor Pena wills his Elton John glasses to Juanita Dela Rosa. And last of all, Glenn Zwerneman wills Dwight Lewis a new joke book.
Now we would like to clear up some bits and pieces. First of all…
Ronald Krueger wills his ability to borrow things and not return them to Ronald Reid. Dean Villoz wills his ability to match clothes to Dale Randig. Deanna Ward wills her fear of snakes to Don Taylor. Steve Girdner wills his official bird license to Linda Bradford. Randy Moe wills Tracy Seaton a roll of Copenhagen and the ability to dip it. And we can’t forget that our own Bridget Strange wills Mike Fickle her last name.
We, the Senior Class of 1976 would like to will the rest of the Pflugerville High School student body, and especially to our friends, the Junior Class, a hope and a challenge – a hope that they continue the excellent tradition that have made our High School so great – traditions such as the striving and attainment of excellence in everything our school has attempted – whether it be in academics, athletics or other endeavors Pflugerville has been involved in. Our challenge to you is that you not only maintain these qualities that have made our school outstanding but that you better them, and in the achievement of this goal you realize the pride and honor of what it means to be called a Senior of Pflugerville High School. In closing, we offer this inspirational thought by Henry Wadsworth Longfellow:
Lives of great men all remind us
We can make our lives sublime,
And, departing, leave behind us
Footprints on the sands of time.
Thanks and God Bless all of you.