British People

(Disclaimer: I am not racist. I hate everyone equally, accept for the Captain Cucumber and the Magical Johnson. Especially Magical Johnson. He makes me-me-me-me so horny).

I hate British people. They act all high and mighty because they talk like they have a boot up their ass and a clothes pin on their nose. But, this isn't what I'm getting at. What I am going to discuss is this: what makes these limey's tick? My theory is the network of Satan and Macaulay Culkin itself...BBC.

BBC is quite simply the epitome of, well, sucktitude. As I type this I have the TV set on BBC and I swear on Hitler's grave that there is a show on now that consists of three naked men jumping from a bridge into a river. Let's hope there are sharks with freakin laserbeams attached to their heads in this river. And herpes. Lots of herpes.

What makes this channel suck even more is the fact that their lineup tonight consists of three shows. Repeated over and over. It wouldn't be so bad if these three shows consisted of Beavis + Butthead, The Simpsons and Bukkake. Lots of Bukkake. Mmmmmmmmm, Bukkake.

When the same shitty shows aren't replayed over and over, even more shitty shows take their places. What, you may ask, can be shittier than shitty itself? Well, I may answer, those horrible shows about women and queers decorating somebody's house. While researching this topic, I watched one of these awful shows and one of these decorating geniuses lined a room in a single wide trailor with duct tape. As this was happening, one of the queers stood there and talked. It wouldn't have been so bad if he wouldn't have tried to use every damn word in the dictionary that contained an "s". He was obviously trying to piss me off with the lisp. I just wanted to pimp slap that bitch then take my cane and crack him on the back of his head with it.

The only good thing to come out of Great Britain was Charles John Huffam Dickens. Huhuhuhuhuh...Huffam Dickens. Huhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhuh. This has nothing to do with my argument in any way but I had to fit in "Huffam Dickens" somewhere.

Bukkake.
Wee.
Bukkake.
Wee.
Bukkake.
Wee.