'How can it be such a beautiful day when the most beautiful person in my life has died?� Blair thought to herself as she rode her bike down the gravel road. The road had been recently raked and smoothed as if the world didn�t care about her loss. The young girl continued her trek down the road that was surrounded by water on both sides, the fish waiting in trepidation for the next day of hooks and lines.
About a hundred yards away, the meadow of her destination came into view over the hill, allowing Blair to ride with all her might before she was to go home.
�That�s not my home anymore� She thought bleakly �That�s just the house where my ungrateful, unloving �family� lives with me. My home left when she died� As she road the last stretch to where her �home� was buried, tears of fear and pain rolled down the young features of her face. This was the first day since �it� happened, that she had visited the ground where the only person who ever loved her was laid to rest. She hadn�t visited since the woman was buried three days ago on a rainy day, as if God himself was saddened by such a wonderful soul being taken away from the world.
�Although� she mused �Heaven has been made that much better. Now they have a wonderful angel up there.� She hopped off her bike and took the flowers out of the carrier basket on the front of her blue bike. It was the only present she had received last year for her birthday. It was the only present she got, as her family had limited resources. But, it was also the only thing she had wanted at the time. Now she could think of another more important, and priceless thing she wanted. Blair walked down the path that was adorned with tulips and roses, leading her to even more beauty. Short trees that had only recently been planted gave her no shade on the unusually hot and windy day.
�There it is.� she had spotted the short and round light gray headstone surrounded by flowers and lively crickets. When she was younger, when her father was a good Christian man, he used to carry his daughter on his shoulders to protect her from the aforementioned creatures. But as she grew older, the man drank for all he was worth and Blair no longer had the safe haven of his shoulders to carry her, neither emotionally nor physically. Eventually, she faced her fear and walked through the tall grass and played with the crickets. She had realized that her fears would not just go away, nor would her pain. So, the best thing to do was embrace it, and heal. That was one of the reasons Blair rode to the meadow this day. She also came to pray and say goodbye. When the young girl reached the grave, she knelt and left wildflowers at the foot of the head stone.
How is it that one moment can change a lifetime, and one event can shape a future? Blair prayed to God and left with him all her pain and anguish love and thanks, just as she was taught. Even though God�s voice was not projected, it was internalized in the hearts of those who prayed. Blair knew that God would hear her, and that was all she cared about, the only thing she still believed in and trusted. After her prayers, the girl spoke to the resident of the grave.
�Hey mamma.� She tried to hold back tears, but it was no use. �I miss you. Nothing seems to make anymore sense. It never really did, but you always made it better. And now I�m alone.� It was then that the anger that always comes with healing set in. �How could leave me in this hell!? You were the only person who ever loved me. Daddy is disappointed in me and is drinking more.� After her mamma got sick, her father started to drink his pain away. Now that she was gone, the need to drink intensified. �I think he hates me now because I remind him of you� Throughout the heartfelt speech to her mother, she had failed to hear a dried up, dead branch crack under the weight of another human. I just wish you were here to sing to me and make everything better like you always used to� she spoke in a mere whisper that was carried away by the wind.
�Blair� a rough voice made its owner�s presence known. The mad laid a dirt-covered hand on her shoulder. The young girl let out a shriek of surprise and fell off her knees. She turned around
�Oh, Daddy. I�m so sorry. I was just on my way back home� Steven knelt down and embraced his daughter, holding her with the strong arms she desperately missed as it had been many years since the last time he had. After a moment, Blair hugged back.
�How could you think I hated you?� he spoke as they both started crying. �Of course you remind me of her. You�re a beautiful person, just like your mother. I�m sorry that I�ve been so distant. It�s just that the times when I smell her," Stevens voice cracked "Her wonderful smell, she's suddenly alive again, but when I stop and think I realize she�s not there. And I have to remind myself that she�s really gone.� The father and daughter hugged and cried together until the sun began to hide its face under the horizon. As they made their way back across the path, they walked in silence.
�Maybe everything will be alright� Blair thought to herself. That was the first time in a very long while she had even contemplated that thought. Maybe, just maybe, that meant something.
THE END