| Letter Seven |
| "Dear" Ana, I am an avid reader of yours, and I'm beginning to wonder if you'll ever give positive feedback in one of your letters. Will you? I'll send you a letter with some cookies and cake if you do. Please consider being nice. signed, Up in his High Horse "Dear" Up in his High Horse, Oh, no. This is terrible. In my letters, have I come across as cold and calloused? Does it seem as though I don't care about you, the readers, with everything I have in me? Oh, on the contrary! I love each and every one of you with all my heart. In fact, I'm absolutely horrified to discover that you could think anything different. Perhaps I have not been as sweet and kind as I could be, but it was only because I wanted to try my hardest to make sure that my point came across to all of you that write in. Oh, and, up yours, you mother-hugging jackbutt. Cookies and milk? Who do you think I am, Santa? Hug you, you hugging son-of-a-female dog! Signed, Dear Ana Editor's Note: This letter has been edited for the sake of the reader. |