Took My Chances on a Big Jet Plane
Don't Ever Let'em Tell Ya They're Allllll the Same
The scene opens up to the inside of Logan International Airport in Boston, Massachusetts. We're at gate 14, where Lufthansa flight 372 to London Heathrow Airport is now boarding. Passengers are showing their tickets to the flight attendants and then boarding the plane, but there is one traveller who looks to be refusing to get on the plane, arguing with one of the flight attendants. Upon closer review, the would-be passenger is Phobia, and he looks to be quite agitated with the service he is receiving.
Phobia: "Look, there must be some sort of mistake here...I'm flying to London to be in a Pay Per View for the gWa...I can't be in coach. McLean would not do that to me. He knows I only travel first-class."
Attendant: "I'm sorry sir, but even if I knew what the gWa, it wouldn't change the fact that your ticket is for coach. There's nothing I can do, other than to tell you to get on the plane or stay here."
Phobia: "I'm getting nowhere with you. I want to speak with the manager."
Attendant: "Sir, I am the manager. You asked one of the other attendants to see me ten minutes ago."
Phobia: "Right, right...so what are my options again? First class or my own charter plane?"
Attendant: "No sir. Your options are to either get on the plane in coach or not get on the plane. It's up to you."
Phobia hands his ticket to the attendant, who then rips it and gives it back to Phobia. Phobia picks up his bags starts to board the plane, but not before turning back once more.
Phobia: "You're lucky I'm not above travelling with the little people...Because they're my little people."
Phobia boards the plane and as soon as he's inside, a strikingly beautiful stewardess takes his ticket and looks at it.
Stewardess: "Right this way, sir. I'll show you to your seat."
The stewardess turns to lead Phobia to his seat.
Phobia (to himself): "Actually, I'd rather you show me your seat."
Stewardess: "I'm sorry, sir, what did you say?"
Phobia: "I said, 'what's the in-flight movie'?"
Stewardess: "Blue Streak, starring Martin Lawrence in comical hijinx."
Phobia: "Please, the only funny thing about that guy is his mental disorder."
The stewardess gives Phobia a strange look and then points out his seat. A middle seat. In the window seat is an old woman, just looking for someone to bore to death with her tales of her family and in the aisle seat is a kid of about eight years old, whose parents and brother of about the same age are in the row of seats behind. Phobia nods to the stewardess to thank her and sits down in his seat as the boy next to him kneels on his seat, facing the back, talking very loudly to his brother. Phobia nods hello to the old woman before pulling out a book and pretending to be instantly immersed in it. After a few minutes, Phobia looks up for an instant and sees Wendy Green, former bWo and current gWa interviewer board and sit in a seat in the aisle across from Phobia's.
Phobia (to himself): "Oh great, the last thing I need is some interviewer ruining my flight, asking me hundreds of questions."
Phobia lifts the book up a little so it hides his face slightly, hoping that Wendy doesn't see him. As more passengers board, the kid next to him sits facing front in his seat and looks long and hard at Phobia. Phobia tries to ignore the staring, but can only last for a few moments before looking at him.
Boy: "I know you."
Phobia: "That's great."
Boy: "You're Phobia."
Phobia: "That's what it says on my underwear."
Boy: "Mine says 'Super Man'."
Phobia: "Don't you know you're not supposed to tell anyone your secret identity?"
Boy: "Huh?"
Phobia: "Nevermind...Hey, if I give you an autograph, will you let me read my book?"
Boy: "Sure!"
Phobia rips a page out of the book and signs it for the kid.
Boy: "Thanks, you're my favoritest wrestler."
Phobia: "That's good to know...This is my favoritest book, so if you'll just keep quiet, I can read it."
The boy turns back to his brother, showing him the autograph, and the two of them talk excitedly and very loudly. And now, the elderly woman next to Phobia is the one staring at him. Again, Phobia can ignore this only for so long before putting the book down and looking at her.
Elderly Woman: "You're a wrestler?"
Phobia: "That I am."
Elderly Woman: "I didn't know wrestlers read books."
Phobia: "Most of them don't. Most of them are so uneducated that they still sign their name with an X."
Phobia picks his book back up and tries to read it again, but the woman is still looking at him. Phobia puts the book down, but doesn't turn to her.
Elderly Woman: "My brother used to be a wrestler."
Phobia: "Did he sign his name with an X?"
Elderly Woman (ignoring Phobia's comment): "His name was Newsboy Brown. He wrestled under that name because Momma didn't want him wrestling and when he first started, she would see his name in the paper, and then he would get in trouble."
Phobia: "Fascinating."
Elderly Woman: "The joke at home was that Momma was the only one that could pin him."
Phobia: "That's funny. The joke around the locker room is that everyone can pin me."
The elderly woman pays no attention to Phobia's remarks. She's just thrilled to have someone listen to her.
Elderly Woman: "He was city champion for four years running. He was so proud of that title."
Phobia: "And me, I can't even get my hands on a title."
Elderly Woman: "The whole city of Burlington, Vermont knew his name and knew he was wrestling...except my Momma. We did a good job of keeping it from her. She would always ask him where he got the money for the bills. Since Dad had passed, my brother had to be the breadwinner of the family..."
Phobia lets his head fall back against the headrest and takes a deep breath. He looks over at Wendy Green and decides she's the lesser of two evils.
Phobia: "Wendy! Hi! Fancy meeting you here. I guess you and I have the same flight over to England."
As Wendy looks up from whatever she was doing, the elderly woman sees that her audience has disappeared. She gets a look on her face like she's used to it and stares out the window.
Wendy: "Phobia. Nice to see you. Yeah, I guess we'll be flying over there together."
Phobia: "Why are you heading over there so early?"
Wendy: "I've got some frequent flyer miles from flying to all the shows over the years, so I thought I'd use them here and take a little vacation in England before the big Pay Per View. What about you?"
Phobia: "I just got bored with the US for right now. Figured I'd take in some of the sights in England this week."
Wendy: "That's great...Hey, we'll have to catch up a bit later so I can get an interview from you...Come to think of it, I don't think I've ever done an interview with you."
Phobia: "No, I guess you haven't."
The two of them look at each other for a few seconds before settling into their respective seats.
Phobia (to himself): "Perfect. I didn't have to give an interview right now and I got the old bitty to stop talking."An hour later
The movie is now in full swing. The elderly woman next to Phobia has fallen asleep with her headphones on. The kid next to Phobia is watching the movie, though his view isn't that great. That hasn't stopped him from laughing incredibly loud at the lewd jokes in the movie. Phobia has been lost in his book, but growing tired of it, he puts it away in his bag and looks around the plane. It's pretty quiet, with everyone either asleep or watching the movie. The only noise he can hear is the kid next to him. Phobia takes a look at Wendy, who is idly flipping through a magazine, not really paying attention to it. She looks up at him and smiles. Wendy then gets up and moves over to the seat where the kid is sitting and taps him on the shoulder. He takes off his headphones to see what she wants.
Wendy: "Hi there...How would you like to have a much better view of the movie?"
Boy: "I'd love to!"
Wendy: "Then why don't you and I switch seats? I'd like to talk to this man for a little while."
Boy: "Sure! Thanks, lady!"
The boy jumps up, tells his mom what's up and sits in the seat that Wendy was sitting in before. Wendy sits down next to Phobia.
Wendy: "I could tell that you could use a break from him."
Phobia: "Thank you very much, but you might want to keep your voice down a bit, or you'll be stuck hearing a story from this woman about her uncle that was once the county's best interviewer."
Wendy laughs a bit, which causes the old woman to stir a little.
Phobia (smiling): "Hey, come on. I'm serious."
The two of them laugh a little bit, trying to keep it quiet.
Phobia: "Do you want a drink?"
Wendy: "You know what? I'd love one. I'll have a martini."
Phobia calls over the stewardess and asks her to bring over a martini.
Wendy: "Nothing for you?"
Phobia: "Are you kidding? I've got a wrestling career to preserve. You think it's easy to maintain this physique?"
Wendy: "Oh come on, I've seen plenty of guys become champion while practically living on alcohol."
Phobia: "Not in the gWa, you haven't."
Wendy: "That's true...So you really think that this is the tops, the best there is?"
Phobia: "You tell me. Take a look around the fed at who we've got and tell me if anyone else has got better."
Wendy: "You've got a point there."
Phobia: "I mean, think about it...In any other federation, I'd be fighting for a title at the first Pay Per View, right?"
Wendy: "No doubt."
Phobia: "And here I'm facing Brian Watts, with nothing on the line."
Wendy: "I wouldn't say that there's nothing on the line."
Phobia: "Was that a double negative? Don't you reporters know not to use those...heheh."
Wendy: "Sorry we can't be as knowledgeable as you bookworm wrestlers."
The two of them laugh again, causing the elderly woman to stir a bit again. Phobia and Wendy see this and try to quiet down, but this just brings about more laughter.
Wendy: "So tell me what you see when you look around the place."
Phobia (looking around the plane): "Well, I see that little kid laughing at sex jokes at the age of ten. I see the guy in front of us having just a little too much to drink. And over there, I think I see a couple under a blanket trying to become the newest members of the Mile High Club...And I see the stewardess doing absolutely nothing, obviously forgetting about getting you that martini."
Wendy (smiling): "Not here...I mean, what do you see when you look around the gWa?"
Phobia: "In the front office, I see some of the hardest working and most creative people in the business...And in the wrestlers, I see the greatest collection of talent I've ever seen in my life. It's really incredible."
Wendy: "It really is. The whole move shocked me."
Phobia: "I wish I could say the same...I've known about it for weeks. You have no idea how I longed to tell somebody about it."
Wendy: "Heh. Thanks for the tip. I'll remember that the next time you want the scoop on someone backstage."
Phobia: "Oh please. Like I ever called in a favor with you before."
Wendy: "No, but maybe after this interview we can start to call in favors on each other..."
Wendy's voice trails off as the two of them look at each other for a moment. Both soon get a little uncomfortable and look away.
Wendy: "When you look around the gWa, who strikes you as the best?"
Phobia: "Of course, there's Cy. To me, he was the man in the bWo. The only thing holding him back was the US Title. Casey, he's pretty damn good, too. And, of course, there's my former running mates from the Invasion, Carnage and King."
Wendy: "King. The two of you exchanged words just before you left the bWo...Has that cooled over?"
Phobia: "It was merely a misunderstanding. He took my respect for his ability as a shot at him, personally, when that's not how I intended it at all...I took a look at some of his interviews after I left, and he eventually understood, and I think we're still on pretty good terms. I haven't talked to him since then, though. But what about you two?"
Phobia gets a sly grin on his face as Wendy blushes a little bit.
Wendy: "Whatever are you talking about?"
Phobia: "Oh come on, I saw the way you acted when you were around him...And he, well, he'd kill me if he knew I told you this, but he had quite the crush on you back then."
Wendy: "Awesome Adam King had a crush on me?"
At this point, the guy in the seat in front of them, who had a little too much to drink and was obviously listening in on the conversation jumped up and looked at Wendy.
Drunken Man (slurring his speech): "Adam King? You don't want that guy...He...he...he treats objects like women...man."
The drunk guy wobbles a bit on his feet before falling back down into his seat and seemingly passing out. Phobia and Wendy laugh again.
Phobia: "King, though, he's a good guy. He's got his head on straight and he's definitely going to go far in this company."
Wendy: "Why aren't you in the front office? You seem to know more about what's going on than anybody."
Phobia: "Front office? I don't think so. I'm only twenty-three...I think I still got a few more years in the ring before I want to hang up my tights."
Wendy: "Twenty-three...That's just amazing. If you ask me, you're going to be doing big things for this company."
Phobia: "We'll see about that. Hopefully it will start on Saturday against Brian Watts. Maybe I can impress enough people to show that I deserve at least some sort of a title shot."
Wendy: "Well, I'm sure you will...The movie's over. I'm going to head back over to my seat and try to get some sleep."
Phobia looks over at the kid in Wendy's seat, seeing that he's even more wired than he was before. He then takes a look at the elderly woman next to him, who is just waking up.
Phobia: "Oh come on, you can't do this to me."
Wendy just smiles before going back to her seat and sending the kid back to his. The kid sits in his seat and starts jumping up and down in it, knocking into Phobia each time and the eldery woman next to him starts up on some new story.