| I met Dan in 1993. This was when we were both in 6th grade. We went to school together for 3 years, but we remained friends even after. Dan was my first REAL male friend. We used to talk on the phone a lot. He used to try to help me out with this guy that I had a huge crush on, but of course he had to embarrass me at the same time! You know how those Junior High years are.....Stupid, fun, innocent, etc. We grew up together and had those conversations that were completely confidential as we were trying to figure out the facts of life. Dan was one of the sweetest people I've ever met. He always made me feel better when I was sad, and he was always making people laugh. When I met him in 6th grade, I would have never guessed how much he'd mean to me. He went from being an aquaintence to being one of my best friends, and then to my brother. He will always have a huge part of my heart. As the years went by, we lost contact little by little. We only spoke every couple of months, but the meaning of him never faded. He started having a lot of problems. He was getting in trouble with his parents, and so on. He ended up going a different path, as I took mine. I missed Dan a lot. I thought about him frequently, and I worried about him, but I never mentioned it to him when we spoke because I wanted to keep the conversation pleasant. Now, I wish that I could have kept in contact with him a lot more, and I wish I would have brought up some of the issues that he needed to confront. When I heard about his death, it almost felt like my soul died with him. If only I could have been there for him.......If only I could have been his support like he used to be mine. Of course I don't blame myself for his death. The last few years, he didn't speak of his problems, but he felt them. I still wish that he would have turned to me. I wish that I could have been the person to turn this whole misfortune around, but so does everyone. The last time I saw him was on April 14th, 2000. It was the day after my son was born. He came to visit us in the hospital. Of course, at the time, I didn't know that it would be the last time I would ever see him, but now that I look back.....I treasure that moment so much, and I'm gratefull that he was able to see my son. I treasure a lot of moments with him. He was a true friend. I never stop thinking of him, and I can't wait for the day that I see him again, and I get the chance to embrace him, and tell him how much I love him. One of the things that helps me through this is the fact that I know how he was feeling. It's like an unspoken understanding that I feel with him even though he's no longer here. I also know, as the poem says.....IT WAS WRITTEN. Our lives have been mapped out. We just don't know the outcome until we reach it. I can't say too much else. Dan will always be alive in my heart, and I'm glad that I can still talk to him to this day. I LOVE YOU, DAN P.S. I still have the rock |
| Patty's Memories |
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