Chapter Twenty-Nine: Ghosts of the past part two.


Wishing you were
somehow here again . . .
knowing we must
say goodbye . . .

Erik watched as the Vicomte place flowers on the grave adorned by the graceful marble angel. Subconsciously, he held Danielle close in his arms finding himself to feel terror for the first time since Christine had found him.

It's amazing how things change when you have something to lose, he thought stroking the girl's curls.

Slowly he looked down to see how she was reacting to the scene that was being performed in front of her. She was still in his arms, holding his hand as she watched the Vicomte intently. Feeling Erik's eyes on her, she looked up at him questioningly. He put a slim finger to his lips he told her to continue her silence, and they both went back to watching Raoul stand above Christine's grave.



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You understand your instructions?

"Meg?" Erik had asked watching apprehensively as Madame Giry continued to rock Danielle back and forth.

"Yes my daughter, surely you haven't forgotten the child..."

"No no, I was merely, I beg your pardon Madame, please proceed." He said sitting beside her on the divan and playing with Dani's feet.

"I would of come to you sooner, if it were not for that blasted husband of hers." She muttered looking at the interaction between the ghost in front of her and the child in her arms.

If she didn't know any better, she would of thought him a harmless, carefree father, just as dependant on the child as she was of him. Then the thought of the dead bodies and blood on his hands made her shudder as she worried about the future of such a child.

"You see, she finally ended up getting married." She said trying to reclaim his attention away from the tiny feet of Danielle.

"Congratulations Madame Giry, I'm sure she has made you proud, I would of gotten them a gift if I had..."

"Oh no, it's not made me proud at all!" She said placing Dani in his arms abruptly and standing up so she had room to pace. The swift action had caught him off guard.

"Then, what did you feel?" He asked the frustrated woman in front of him calmly. She had attracted his attention and he felt compelled to pay it to her.

"I did, at first. Please understand at first, I had been happy for her. I was not exactly happy she was marrying someone as, how should I put it?"

"In words Madame Giry, your own preferably, no need to euphemize." Erik told her, looking softly into eyes so that she felt at ease speaking with him.

"Well Monsieur le phantome, to be frank I hated Audric from the moment I saw him."

He would of chuckled and asked her if that wasn't how she felt towards everyone she met, however he could tell in her stature she had a reason to.

"That incorrigible little bastard! He charmed his way into her life and ruined it. I knew right from the first time we met he was going to be trouble. No it wasn't his status, who am I to judge on such a thing? Meg nor I are indeed high society, nevertheless I had a feeling." Her angry rant slowed and her cheeks flushed.

"I beg your pardon, I shouldn't say such things in front of the child." She whispered.

"Although I admit, I have never heard you speak in such fashion, I cannot condemn you. After all, we both know there are many things worse then speaking open-mindedly? Do we not?" He asked. Danielle took this opportunity to snatch the mask away from his face leaving him naked in front of his guest.

"Damn it, Danielle." He muttered frustrated as he tried to gently take his mask out of the small hands of the giggling child in his lap. He looked towards Madame Giry who had turned away from the sight of his face. Whether she did it to make him feel more comfortable or to spare herself the horror, he did not know.

"Monsieur le Phantome, this is your home, do not feel obligated to wear that in my presence." She said calmly turning to face him.

"I wear it because it is apart of me." He stated numbly, "We all wear masks Madame Giry, I just choose to wear mine externally. Please continue."

"Yes, well. At first I thought he might prove me wrong, he was always fawning over her and being so wonderful to her. It wasn't until I saw her after rehearsal one day." She said, slipping into the memory, and sitting in the chair across him.

"She was taking off her ballet shoes and the shoulder of her dress fell, revealing a nasty bruise, I did not say a thing, merely looked upon the mark, horrified. As I told you before, I know that life style all to well." She said, closing her eyes to keep the tears from falling.

Erik's heart went out to her, for he knew of her struggle and how her husband himself had once beaten her. Mr Giry had been an alchoholic who drunk himself into a blind stupor one night and walked infront of a carriage. She had once opened up to him when they had casually met in box five that she was thankful everyday Meg never had met him.

He felt the back of his neck begin to burn in the familiar manner it did when he was upset. His fingers began to tingled and he realized he had the urge to break something, anything whether it was a neck or a vase. He would of most likely, if it weren't for Danielle still being in his arms.

"I sense you have not finished Madame, please carry on." He said icily through his teeth.

"Right, yes. After that day I would pay attention closer to her, and how she hid her scars. Scarves over her neck, large bracelets sometimes donned her wrists. Finally it got so bad that she would let her hair down and in front of her face. For the first time in twenty years I felt helpless, utterly out of control. I could not approach her, I could not save her, I had not even been able to save myself when it was happening to me." She said finally relenting her strict and stubborn fa�ade to allow her tears to fall.

Erik got up and put Danielle in her arms, he was afraid of the strong desire in him to hurt something, and he didn't want Danielle near him. It was not because he feared hurting her however, but he worried he would frighten her.

Slowly he walked over to the fire that was cackling loudly. He clenched and unclenched his fists, remembering that he had always had a soft spot for the blonde haired, bubbly young woman who was the complete opposite of her mother.

To hear all of this now was creating an itch he could not scratch, a tingling sensation he had hidden for what seemed to be years. He knew that he had controlled it longer before, however could his will hold up under this assault?

"Finally she came to me today, in my arms I received her, and in my arms she wept. 'I am pregnant mother,' she had whispered, 'and I do not want to live'. She knew I had known all along, I saw it when she looked up at me with pleading eyes. 'I sent him away, told him to leave, that is how much I did not want to live, and instead of hurt me like I have grown accustom to, instead of killing me like I suspected, he did as I asked. He left without a word, took everything and went.' My heart skipped a beat at those words, to know that she had broken free of her chains instead of waiting until they are broken for her by death. Like my chains that I never spoke to her of, her fathers abuse. It was then I realized why she still had come to me. 'I fear my child will grow up being called a bastard, I do not want for it to be ridiculed and treated poorly because I could no longer live like that,' She had said to me."

Erik listened as she stifled a sob and Danielle began to whimper threatening everyone in the room that she was about to cry. He slowly closed his eyes in an attempt to shut out the hate that had welled in his heart while he imagined Christine.

"I always loved you Erik, I always will... Thank you for loving me Erik... I am honoured and proud to be the one loved by you. Remember that, remember what I have said... remember... everything..." he heard her voice whisper in his memory.

He kept that locked away in his heart every time he felt as though his world was to collapse. He would remember her strength in those final moments and use it as his strength to carry on, to be the man she had seen within him.

He turned his face away from the fire and gradually walked towards Madame Giry who was trying to calm the fussy Danielle in her lap.

"Here, let me take her for you." He said picking up his little angel and began to softly sing to her until she was asleep in his arms. Without a word he left the den and placed the sleeping child within her bassinet.

Swiftly he returned to the den area where a defeated Madame Giry awaited him.

"Your wonderful with her Erik, she truly loves you."

"You would think as much wouldn't you? Please continue on about Megan."

"That is really all Erik, I told her to leave everything to me, and rushed out of the apartment. I walked for a good long hour before realizing there was only one person in this world who could help, who would care enough too." She said wiping the tears from her eyes and trying to maintain her crisp disguise.

"I do not know what to say, where do you think he went?" Erik asked knowing what Madame Giry was asking for.

"He never told her, or she would of told me." She said coolly, completely back to how she had been when she had greeted him.

"Are you sure you want this? If I find him, and the deed is done, there is no turning back Madame Giry. I am certainly damned for eternity; I have already made peace with my demons. Are you sure that you want to get involved in something that is against your religion?" He asked her.

She sat there for a long moment, both waiting in silence for an answer to such a difficult question. He stood over her, listening to the cacophony of silence that invaded his home, such a sound he hated.

"I think it is time for me to head back now Monsieur le Phantome," She finally said.

"Alright, I shall get your cloak Madame." He responded getting it and holding it out for her as she trailed behind.

Gently he placed it on her shoulders and followed her out the door of the home. The ride across the lake was as deafening silent as the awkward pause in the house.

Nevertheless, Erik focused on rowing as quickly as he could across the lake so he could get back to Danielle.

"What do I tell her?" She finally asked him when he had finished helping her out of the boat and pulled away from the shore.

"Tell her, tell her to tell everyone she is a widow."



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Try to forgive . . .
teach me to live . . .
give me the strength
to try . . .

"I told Meg of how I came back for you and Danielle. How I had a lead on your murderers. I will find who ever did this Christine. I will not rest until justice has been served in the name of our daughter and yourself." He whispered.

Slowly he closed his eyes, so that he could not let the tears fall. After all these years he still felt weak at the knees near this grave, but he knew that he needed to be strong.

"I stopped drinking, I know you would be proud. I realized that it was not going to bring her back, or you for that matter. I realized that you didn't leave me purposely either. I appoligize for feeling that, I know you didn't die to spite me. I loved you so much Christine, I would of given you the world if you so desired. I don't think you really wanted the world though, I fear you wanted the moon; the moon and the night." He finished and leaned in to graze his fingers along her name.

"You left so quickly Christine, yet I fear I lost you long before. That is why I still ache so badly. That is why I cannot get passed this feeling of being utterly lost."

"I don't know if Meg comes to visit, did you know she has a son? He is beautiful Christine, simply astounding. I plan on seeing more of him. I have decided I hope to be apart of his life as a male confidant, a male figure of some sort. Whether he needs a funny uncle, a doting father, a benefactor, I want to be there for him. I want to do something that I know you would do. Something at least you can be proud of me for."

"I suppose I shall visit more often now that I am back in Paris. I believe you know that Phillipe will soon be with you as well, another reason why I have returned to Paris. Soon I will no longer be the Vicomte de Chagny, and instead the Comte himself. Imagine that? Even without you I have created a scandal for myself, I presume it was fate that I did." Slowly he rose from his kneeled position and kissed the angel above.

"Christine, I love you." He finished and walked away into the night.



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Sometimes it seemed
if I just dreamed,
somehow you would
be here . . .

Erik finally released the breath he was holding. When did the Vicomte get back? How long was he going to stay? What was to become of him? All these questions and more were running through Erik's mind when he remembered Danielle in front of him.

"Dani?" He softly whispered to her, as he realized all her body weight was leaning into him.

"Hmm?" She said sleepily while he picked her up into his arms. She was asleep, he realized, which was not a complete surprise for it was past her bedtime. If the Vicomte had not been there then they would have been home by now.

"Papa I'm cold." She whispered sleepily.

"I know little angel, I will get us home." He said quietly in her ear as he continued to think.

What was going to happen, he did not know. Although he was certainly glad that Danielle fell asleep when she did, for now he didn't have to go through the painstaking process of explaining that the man they had watched was her true father. That technically she belonged with Raoul, and not in his arms right now.

Thoughtfully he looked down at the precious gift in his arms. What would he do if she asked him that? What could he possibly say? There had been a time when she said that she chose him as her Papa. However one day that might change, maybe one day she will want her papa to be someone else, and surely then the pain would kill him. The pain of loosing her would destroy what remaining love he had left, and he would be forever void. She was the only reason he continued his struggle of life.

What had he been thinking? One day she might even ask why there is a tomb behind her mothers with her name as well on it. What would he tell her of that? Why had he not thought of these things years ago, so that he had time to prepare? Why had he not thought of these things while Madame Giry was still around to give him friendly advice?

Even if he had not killed in years, that did not mean that he was pardoned of all his past crimes. In fact, he did not even know if he would of been capable of killing Audric if he found him. However, none of that meant that if Danielle found out she would continue to love him.

As they existed the Cemetery gates he knew one thing for sure, as much as he still loved her, he would never visit Christine's grave again.

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