Memorable quotes (going on forever because I kept finding ones I liked):
"That woman? Do you know why I sat with her? Because she reminded me of you."
"Really?"
"Of course, that's why I'm sitting here with you. Because you remind me of you. Your eyes, your throat, your lips! Everything about you reminds me of you. Except you. How do you account for that?"

"Do they allow tipping on the boat?"
"Yes, sir."
"Have you got two fives?"
"Yes, sir!"
"Well, then you won't need the ten cents I was gonna give you."

"You live here all alone?"
"Yes. Just me and my memories. I'm practically a hermit."
"Oh. A hermit. I notice the table's set for four."
"That's nothing - my alarm clock is set for eight. That doesn't prove a thing."

"Signor Lassparri comes from a very famous family. His mother was a well-known bass singer. His father was the first man to stuff spaghetti with bicarbonate of soda, thus causing and curing indigestion at the same time."

"You see that spaghetti? Now, behind that spaghetti is none other than Herman Gottlieb, director of the New York Opera Company. Do you follow me?"
"Yes."
"Well stop following me or I'll have you arrested!"

"Now pay particular attention to this first clause because it's most important. It says, 'The party of the first part shall be known in this contract as the party of the first part.' How do you like that? That's pretty neat, eh?"

"Shh! Don't wake him up. He's got insomnia, he's trying to sleep it off."