Stupid Website of the
Week
September 17, 2004
God Hates Fags
also known as The Westboro Baptist
Church Home Page
Hello and a huge, throbbing
welcome to the very first Stupid Website of the Week. For our
first award-winner, we'll review the ultimate human rights page-
Reverend Fred Phelps' "God Hates Fags" webpage!
First, the index page. It has one image, an ugly yellow sign that was obviously made in Paint that says "WARNING!! GOSPEL PREACHING AHEAD." However, the "gospel preaching" isn't actually in the website, but on the index page itself. It's all the biblical reasons why fagz r gay, mmmkay?
"For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in Him should not perish, but have everlasting life." John 3:16. Can someone please explain to me what this has to do with homosexuality? In reality, the page only lists one Bible verse which specifically condemns homosexuality; the others are vague statements that could be applied to anything deemed disagreeable.
Near the bottom of the index page is a warning that the main page contains a Gospel memorial to Matthew Shephard... awwww... how sweet of them. Clickety click...
Oh look, on the left side of the page is a lovely animation of a little boy holding an upside-down American flag in one hand and a yellow sign proclaiming "FAG SIN" in the other, with a drawing of what appears to be a man with abnormally low buttocks touching the lower back of another man who is squatting (could be constipation). The boy looks rather shocked at the blank space in between the flag and yellow sign.
The first text column is titled "Love Crusades." Oh yeah, now that's some happy homosexual fun right there! They have shedules for upcoming pickets, all of them being in either the South or Utah. They also say they're going to picket two "whoremongers," Bill Clinton and Bob Dole.
The other text column is just called "Special," whatever that means. The stuff listed isn't really that great. They have a nice little prayer up for our reading pleasure, and it is transcribed here (with my illustrations as links, and scary things bolded):
All together now...
An Appropriate, Timely, Imprecatory Prayer for America
Hear us, O GOD, and heed this imprecatory prayer of thy humble servants upon America.
How long, O LORD, holy and true, dost thou not judge and avenge our blood on them that dwell on the earth; who in their pride, fullness of bread, and abundance of idleness, commit abominations as the iniquity of Sodom? How long until we may see every bond man and every free man hide in the rocks and dens of the mountains and call for the mountains to fall upon them to hide them from thy face and wrath?
America is become an habitation of devils, and the hold of every foul spirit, and a cage of every unclean and hateful bird. America is become Babylon! All nations are drunk on the wine of the wrath of her fornication, and the kings of the earth have committed fornication with her, and the merchants of the earth are waxed rich through the abundance of her delicacies. Remember her iniquities, O LORD, for her sins have reached unto heaven. How much she hath glorified herself, and lived deliciously, so much torment and sorrow give her: for she saith in her heart, I sit a queen, and am no widow, and shall see now sorrow. Avenge thy servants on her, O LORD GOD that we may rejoice.
We thank thee for sending the airplanes which brought down the towers, the symbols of her economic dominion over the whole earth. Now she says, she will return and build that desolate place. As thou hast promisted, she shall build, but thou will throw down; America will be called the border of wickedness, and, the people against whom the Lord hath indignation forever.
We thank thee for scattering the seven across the plains of Texas; for destroying the symbol of her knowledge, her might, her science falsely so called; her precious Columbia.
We thank thee that thou has caused the blood of Americans, who trusted her military strength, to be poured out by the force of the sword and their wives be bereaved of their children, and be widows; let their men continue to be put to death and their young men continue to be slain by the sword in battle. For they look not unto the Holy One of Israel, neither seek the Lord.
We thank thee that thou has smitten America with AIDS; a botch that cannot be healed and a disease that cannot be cured. Appoint over her terror and a burning plague that shall consume her eyes, O Lord that thy glories might be known and her pride might be brought low.
We thank thee O Lord God, that thy wrath is revealed from heaven in the form of unquenchable forest fires, destructive flooding of her lands, and the terrors of lightening, earthquake, hurricane, and draught. Cause them to see terror all around. Magormissabib!
Americans did not like to retain God in their knowledge and will not endure sound doctrine; Her churches and synagogues no longer serve God, but have become whore houses for false gods, and leper colonies, and dog kennels, whereby ye require your seed, whom ye hate, to pass through the fire to Molech.
The people are taught to commit fornication and adultery. Blood is in their hands, and with their idols they have committed whoredoms. They prophesy smooth things and not right things, and have sold themselves to do evil in the sight of the Lord, to provoke him to anger.
They call evil good, and good evil; they put darkness for light, and light for darkness; they put bitter for sweet and sweet for bitter. They are wise in their own eyes and prudent in their own sight; they provoke the Lord their God to jealousy and wrath.
Thou hast sent America the sodomite seven who framed mischief by a law, who in their decrees call feces-eating good and Gospel preachers evil! Hear what the unjust American judges have decreed; shall not the soul of God be avenged on such a nation as this?
Make her councils confusion and her concourse vain. Take from America her children O Lord, God, for they hate the blessings of the womb, they despise the heritage that thou hast given them. Those children they have not killed, they give to these fag dogs. Let America eat her children, as they eat feces now.
Preserve them in the iniquity of their false doctrine and cause them to perpetuate their lies to one another. We thank thee for blinding their eyes and stopping up their ears and making their hearts fat and hard so that they cannot see with their eyes, hear with their ears and understand with their hearts lest thou should heal them.
Let the holy ones and the watchers issue forth a decree from heaven against this American tree - hew it down; hew down the tree; and let hell be moved to greet them at their coming! Let this nation be Anathema Maranatha.
Shall not God avenge his own elect, which cry day and night unto him though he bear long with them? Hear us, O LORD; avenge us speedily, that we may rejoice.
*ahem*
I'm very sorry you all had to sit through that. On to the rest of the website!
In an interview, Rev. Phelps referred to George W. Bush as an "insane little monster" and a creature with "the mentality of a gnat." DAMN IT! Must... not... agree... with... bigot...
Then he goes and says that the people who were killed on 9/11 died for the sins of Mr. Rogers. I am dead serious, that's what he said. Ahh, urge to agree with bigot completely erased.
Upon clicking on something
called "I Dare You to Read This," we see some REAL
TESTIMONY FROM FAGS CHANGED BY MR. PHELPS:
I trapped myself into faggotry when I was 19 years old.
I had in and out of doctors' offices for years, diagnosed and
treated for ghonorrea, scabies, and lice. I thought I had hit the
bottom when diagnosed with herpes in 1995. But on that day in
1999, I learned that I had tested positive for HIV.
The website also has a counter of how many days Matthew Shephard and Diane Whipple have been in hell. Joy!!
Ugh... I'm getting a headache. I guess that's all for this week's installment of Stupid Website of the Week. *slams head on desk*
