| Be courteous, kind and forgiving Be gentle and peaceful each day Be warm and human and grateful And have a good thing to say Be thoughtful and trusting and childlike Be witty and happy and wise Be honest and love all your neighbors Be obsequious, purple and clairvoyant Be pompous, obese and eat cactus Be dull and boring and omnipresent Criticize things you don't know about Be oblong and have your knees removed Be tasteless, rude and offensive Live in a swamp and be 3-dimensional Put a live chicken in your underwear Get all excited and go to yawning festival |
| GRANDMOTHER'S SONG |