I intend for those reading this page not to feel pity for the one writing it but for them to know what my friend was like and in my own way, this is my dedication to one of the best friends I have ever had. It is still hard after all these years to not think of him when I see something that we used to do, use to laugh at together when ever I saw him in Ohio. I chose this Midi because the first time I heard it, it invoked such emotion that I knew this song would always be special to me. The song, "Name" by the Goo Goo Dolls, probably has different meaning to most but to me it is a friend asking a lost friend to "Come back down, I won't tell them your name." A question of a person like myself who still finds it hard to understand why a great guy, just a few months younger than me, had to be taken away so early in his life.

Chris died November 18, 1995 in an unexpected blizzard while skiing in France but was not alone. Groups of students from Miami of Ohio University were in a student exchange program with their sister school in Europe. One group decided to go skiing so they drove up to the French Alps, but obviously did not expect the day ahead of them. My friends and I used to be in Ski Club when I still lived in Ohio and the winter days are not so cold when the sun is out. We would normally just wear a sweater or sweatshirt and a pair of jeans, and unfortunately that is all most of this group had on. They had no idea that a flash blizzard would come upon them, had no idea this night would change the rest of their lives. I was not there of course, but I do have a magazine article that tells the story of one the survivors, the best friend of the young lady that died along with Chris.

Chris was not my best friend, and I did not know him very long because I did not meet him until Junior High School, but he sure did influence me a lot. A student that excelled in everything, and a guy with the love of adventure that without knowing it, instilled in me also, he will forever be known for his kindness and ease to get along with anyone who he met in life. The Christmas of 1994 found my family traveling to Mansfield, to spend our time off work and school with my relatives. I had not seen Chris since the summer after I moved in 1991 because he had gone into the Army.

I got in touch with some friends and we all decided to go to Denny's one evening to catch up, to speak of old times when we were young and did not have to worry about bills but did worry about love. I remember that night like it was yesterday. Chris was there, Carla, Jason, John, Christi and I and as time passed by, we laughed and even cried because it was a good time in our lives, one of those moments you always reflect back upon. Upon paying the check I thought of what I could do to remember this night, so I looked around... to find something to take with me and looked up, took a single flower out of the vase and placed it into my pocket. I still have it today.

Later that night Chris dropped me off and we had talked of him coming down to North Carolina the next day, the day we were leaving also. He still had a few days off from school and to my amazement; he did come down to visit. I do not have to tell my friends here in North Carolina about what a great guy he was because they saw first hand how cool and funny he was.

I saw Chris a few more times as our trips to Ohio dwindled because we were finally settling into our new ways in North Carolina but the last time and the time I am most thankful for was August of 1995. I had been talking to a girl I had met in Ohio the previous year through letters and phone calls and decided to take a week off work to see her. I drove to Mansfield by myself; think it was August 8 to be exact for 8 full days. The drive was fun, but driving 12 hours in a Geo Storm without cruise control makes your feet fall asleep!

I dropped by the house as I always did to see if Chris was in town and his mom told me he was working. I drove up to Sandy Hill where he worked and surprised the hell out of him! He was like, "Whoa, hey man!" He told me when he was going to get off work so I drove around and visited old neighbors until then. I picked him up and we ventured out into the boring city of Mansfield to find something to do.

"How about renting a movie, what about the mall, hey... isn't there a new movie theater in town?" We went down the list but decided on the Richland County Fair. We didn't ride any rides but did play a LOT of video games that night... as I remember Chris and I always did that. I wish I could let you in on those nights because I can still remember certain conversations we had that night.

We ended up hanging out at his house and the next night we crashed at Rick's place. We played a few games of pool, drank a few beers and talked of old times. I remember Chris and Rick talking about what States we could get rid of, and the ones that we should keep. They were always talking about something crazy like that. We finally fell asleep and the next day I dropped him off at his house. That was a Wednesday, the last day I would ever see him or talk to him.

Three months later in November, on a Sunday morning after the night I went to see George Clinton and the P Funk Band with Chris and TJ (two friends here in NC) ...my father walked into my room and woke me up. "Son, wake up... there is something I have to tell you. Granny just called and it is about Chris. He has passed away." Those words are still vivid in my head, still make me numb but it seemed like a dream. I did not do anything... just rolled over and stared at the wall. I thought I was dying myself and that was the beginning of the longest day of my life.

I watched Headline News and taped the story, had friends send me newspaper clippings and I even sent his parents a letter. I do know that I feel a bit guilty because my loss is nothing compared to that of his parents and sister, and is small in comparison to his best friend Dan. A month or so later still found me having a hard time dealing with his death, but to my amazement, Dan called me late one night. I had not talked to him in 5 years, and to be honest I probably did not leave Ohio on the best of terms with him, but we talked. I cried and he helped me a lot... I would like to think we helped each other.

Whenever I go back to Ohio, I visit Chris' grave and talk to him. Each person deals with death differently and I would like to think I would see Chris again, so I refuse in my own little way to say good-bye to him. I grew up that day, found that part of myself that I was missing. My love for life grew ten fold and I started doing things I always said I would never do. The courage to ask a complete stranger out, to free fall at Kings Dominion and the list goes on.

The people referred to as "they" say that a little bit of good comes out of a person's death and I guess that is true. He taught me a great lesson, but that does not mean I still do not think of him, still miss him more than words can describe.

I know Chris is still looking down upon me, still laughing with that laugh you would always remember if you only heard it once.

I miss you Chris, thanks for everything.

~Brian