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| BEING A STUDENT OF THE SCIENCES, I HAVE ENCOUNTERED MANY STRANGE FACTS THROUGH THE YEARS. NORMALLY, I PUSH THE "I BELIEVE" BUTTON, AND THINK NO MORE OF IT. BUT SOME THINGS JUST BLOW MY MIND NO MATTER HOW MANY TIMES I HAVE THEM EXPLAINED TO ME. FOR YOUR ENTERTAINMENT, HERE'S A PARTIAL LISTING" 1. RELATIVITY: IF I'M DRIVING MY CAR AT THE SPEED OF LIGHT, AND I TURN ON THE HEADLIGHTS, WILL THE LIGHT BE MOVING AT TWICE THE SPEED OF LIGHT? NO, BECAUSE THE SPEED OF LIGHT IS CONSTANT THROUGH ALL FRAMES OF REFERENCE. WHAT IMPLICATIONS DOES EINSTEIN CLAIM THIS HAS FOR YOU? DISTANCE, TIME, AND EVEN MASS ARE ALL RELATIVE, DEPENDING ON YOUR FRAME OF REFERENCE. SO, IF I JOG A MILE, AND YOU WALK IT, I WILL HAVE AGED LESS THAN YOU AT THE END (MY WATCH WILL BE SLOW COMPARED TO YOURS). DON'T WORRY-MY MILE WILL HAVE BEEN A DIFFERENT LENGTH THAN YOURS, SO I GUESS IT ALL WORKS OUT. 2. HEISENBERG UNCERTAINTY PRINCIPLE: SO YOU WANT TO OBSERVE BOTH THE SPEED AND LOCATION OF A SUBATOMIC PARTICLE? SORRY DUDE, BUT IT'S NO GO. YOU CAN GET ONE OR THE OTHER WITH FAIR ACCURACY, BUT NOT BOTH AT ONCE. MATHEMATICALLY, THE MORE YOU TRY TO OBSERVE BOTH, THE MORE UNCERTAINTY IS INTRODUCED. UNFORTUNATELY, YOU CANNOT OBSERVE THE PARTICLE WITHOUT AFFECTING IT. BIG ELECTRON PROBABILITY CLOUD IMPLICATIONS FOR YOU QUANTUM PHYSICISTS. 3. ROTATION: SAY I HAVE A TWO FOOT PROPELLER BLADE. AS THE BLADE SPINS, IT CREATES A ROTATIONAL PATH. THE OUTER TIP OF THE BLADE SPINS IN A CIRLE WITH A CIRCUMFERENCE TWICE THAT OF THE INSIDE TIP OF THE BLADE. BOTH TIPS MAKE ONE COMPLETE REVOLUTION IN THE SAME AMOUNT OF TIME. THIS MEANS THAT THE OUTSIDE TIP OF THE BLADE IS ACTUALLY MOVING FASTER THAN THE INSIDE TIP OF THE SAME BLADE! EVERY POINT ON THE BLADE IS MOVING AT A DIFFERRENT SPEED, DEPENDING ON ITS DISTANCE FROM THE CENTER OF ROTATION. 4. BLACK HOLES: SOME SAY SPACE IS NOT FLAT, BUT CURVED. IT IS DEFORMED BY MASSIVE BODIES WHICH PASS THROUGH IT, SUCH AS PLANETS IN THEIR ROTATION, AND STARS. BLACK HOLES ARE DENSE ENOUGH TO CURVE SPACE INTO THEM. LIGHT TRAVELS A STRAIGHT LINE, WHICH IS ACTUALLY CURVED INTO THE HOLE. ADD CURVED TIME TO CURVED SPACE, AND YOU GET SOME WEIRD RESULTS. PS-IF YOU GET SUCKED INTO A BLACH HOLE FEET FIRST, YOUR HEAD MAY WEIGH A FEW POUNDS AT THE SAME TIME THAT YOUR FEET WEIGH SEVERAL TONS. DON'T WORRY-YOU'LL BE DEAD. 5. CHINESE RESTAURANTS: PERHAPS THE BIGGEST MYSTERY OF ALL. I'VE BEEN TO DOZENS OF THEM, AND THEY ARE ALL BUFFETS. DO THE CHINESE EAT ANYTHING ELSE? DOES MOM HAVE TO SET UP THE BUFFET LINE EVERY DAY FOR HER KIDS? APPARENTLY THEIR NEIGHBORS THE MONGOLIANS ONLY HAVE STIR-FRY. I DON'T CARE-I'LL TAKE A WHATABURGER OVER EITHER. 6. ATMS: I ACTUALLY SAW BRAILLE ON A DRIVE-THROUGH ATM MACHINE. I DON'T CARE HOW INDEPENDENT BLIND PEOPLE ARE-THEY SHOULD DRAW THE LINE AT DRIVING. 7. NATURAL SELECTION: THE BASIS FOR EVOLUTION IS NATURAL SELECTION. WE'LL DEFINE THIS AS SURVIVAL OF THE FITTEST. WHO ARE THE FITTEST? THOSE WHO GO ON TO REPRODUCE. THEREFOR, NATURAL SELECTION STATES THAT THOSE WHO SURVIVE TO REPRODUCE SURVIVE TO REPRODUCE. A TAUTOLOGY, THIS DEFINITION ADDS NO INFORMATION. IF NATURAL SELECTION IS INVALID IN ITS DEFINITION, IS EVOLUTION ALSO BUNK? PEOPLE WISER THAN YOU OR ME HAVE ARGUED THIS LITTLE BOO-BOO EXHAUSTIVELY. BONUS ARGUMENT: AT WHAT LEVEL DOES SELECTION OCCUR? |
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| THIS WEBSITE IS THE WORK OF ONE INDIVIDUAL-ME. I GET ALL THE PROPS. HOWEVER, I COULDN'T HAVE DONE IT WITHOUT: GEOCITIES.COM AND THEIR FREE PAGEBUILDER SOFTWARE. THE LAMEST SOFTWARE EVER, BUT WHAT DO YOU WANT FOR FREE? ALL THE GOOD DESIGN FEATURES ARE FROM BRODERBUND'S PRO PRINT SHOP 12. GOOD STUFF FOR THE HTML-ILLITERATE. I WISH TO THANK ALL THE PEOPLE WHO UNKNOWINGLY DONATED GRAPHICS AND INFO-YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE (EVEN THOUGH I PROBABLY DON'T). MY EX-ROOMMATE FOR HIS OFTEN IMPATIENT AND ALWAYS HOSTILE TUTORAGE IN THE ART OF COMPUTER USE. ALSO, THANKS FOR DOING MY CS101 PROJECT FOR ME. CHEERS! ALL THE LITTLE PEOPLE I ABUSED AND TOOK ADVANTAGE OF-GOD BLESS 'EM- EVERY ONE. GUINNESS BEER, FOR HOURS OF ENTERTAINMENT IN EVERY HAPPY LITTLE PINT. PAT GREEN, FOR TEACHING ME THAT NOT ALL MUSIC FROM TEXAS IS BAD, AND THAT EVERYONE HAS A FRIEND IN LUCHENBACH. PS-"STILL PROUD TO LIVE IN THE GREATEST COUNTRY IN THE WORLD" |
| AND IT MAKES ME WONDER... |
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